If you’re anything like me, you own one air conditioner that’s only strong enough to cool a tiny pocket of air, and you’re afraid to turn it on anyway because of that pesky electricity bill.

So basically, you’re spending these summer days dripping in sweat. And not that pretty, girlish glisten. Sweat. Sticking to your clothes, running down your back, mattering your hair down until you feel as attractive and energetic as a cat that’s been hosed with dirty water.

What’s a girl stuck in the middle of summer without AC to do? She improvises.

#1 Make a Towel-sicle: If you’re certain it’s going to be 90 degrees with a 100% chance of stuffiness tonight, wet a small washcloth or towel and put it in freezer for up to an hour. When you’re ready to go to bed, take that baby out and use it to cool yourself for a few blissful minutes. The one downside to this endeavor is the obvious melting issue, but hey, a little wetness never hurt anyone.

#2 Freeze your Head: Much like the towel-sicle, all this improvisation needs is a cloth bandana and a freezer. Moisten the bandana and stick it in the freezer up to an hour before going outside. Sure, you can buy something made specifically for this purpose, but most of them make you look like a giant tool.

#3 About Face the Fan: When the temperature outside is just as hot as the temperature inside, it makes no sense to have a window fan that’s blowing hot air into your room. Turning the fan around so it blows air back out your window keep things circulating, and does wonders for that “stagnant room” smell.

#4 Shower it Up: Obvious, you say? Maybe, but a good cold shower can invigorate and rejuvenate, and it’s always advisable to rinse that lovely face off after a day of sweaty activity. Clean skin is happy skin.

#5 Cover Your Seat: Leather car seats can be torture after a day in the sun, so do those thighs a favor and drape them with a bamboo cover. Bamboo rarely gets hot and doesn’t soak up sweat, plus, retro is always in.

#6 Soak Those Feet: One of the fastest ways to lower a body’s temperature is to dunk the feet into ice water. Find a bowel, fill it with cold water and ice, turn on the TV, and soak yourself cool.

Always remember, camping out in front of an open fridge won’t do anything except suck up your energy bill and wilt all your veggies. If it’s really too hot to deal, finding your nearest public library, church, or mall is the best way to chill out for a few hours.

And don’t worry, you’re not the only one who’s melting this summer. I’m right there with you, wiping my liquefied eyeliner five times a day and secretly dropping ice cubes from the company fridge down my shirt.

I won’t tell if you won’t.