Daddy Simpson is spreading the word. Big sis Jess is taking it country. No more bubblegum pop.

Although I will admit I loved “With You”…which I’m listening to right now…

That’s the reason I love Jessica Simpson. Her music sucks and its horrible… and I love it. It’s the dance around in your underwear, want to be in love, lip-syncing in the mirror with a hairbrush type of music. It’s awful. It’s so awful you can’t help but love it. And I do.

But country?

Please, Jessica, spare me.

Your fake country accent in Dukes of Hazzard was worse than your fake tan at the CFDA awards. I grew up on country music and there are plenty of awful female country singers out there to go around. If there wasn’t, I wouldn’t have “Redneck Woman” stuck in my head right now.

As everyone’s favorite teenager dad said, “Everything in the music business, especially pop music, has moved away from singers. And I think country is the only pure, storytelling kind of genre left.”

So Jessica has a story to tell, and apparently she wants to tell it through country ballads rather than bubblegum pop lyrics. Is one genre not enough for musicians these days? Do they have to do everything—not just movies and music but every music genre too?

You can’t just sing anymore. There has to be techno beats and rap duos and lines like “It’s Britney, Bitch.” And now country is the new pop. Ugh.

It’s fine to be experimental with your music, to try something different. But sometimes, you should stick to what you know (or what you kind of know…consdering past album sales…).

But apparently, since she’s from Texas, Jessica (or Joe) think that they know country.

I guess we’ll have to wait and see…

Yee Haw Pardner!