Last time: we found out that Daisy is a stripper and Jessica went home.

Morning: everyone is back at the house quietly eating breakfast. Destiney isn’t wearing make up and she looks fantastic without it. Big John comes in with three buckets for them to clean the house because someone they know is coming. Daisy is cleaning in a half shirt. Of course she is.

Doorbell rings and it’s parent time. Ambre’s dad is the first to arrive and they hug like she’s coming home from war. Bret got his hair blown out and flat ironed and he desperately needs a bandana. At least a real parent showed up for her this time.

Destiney’s parents come. She’s wearing a pink hat but no make up so I’ll forgive the stupid hat.

Daisy’s been on her own since she was 15 so instead of parents, Stephanie, Daisy’s ex-boyfriend’s sister, shows up for her. Are you kidding? Bret is clearly not thrilled.

They all hit the bar and Bret tries to serve up Destiney’s dad who can’t drink because he has liver cancer. He’s been given less than six months to live and Destiney’s awesome biker dad with the tattoo on his forehead makes her seem very human to me. Before this she was just a big bag of siliconed eyeliner crazy.

BBQ – Bret asks Ambre’s dad about all of his children. Ambre’s 37. Bret, don’t act like you really thought that she was really 32.

After eating, Bret shows everyone a clip from a show and Destiney got up to do a groupie dance. In front of her parents. Bret holds Ambre’s hand during her freak dance because he’s worried that Destiney won’t love Bret Michaels off stage.

Bret’s going to take everyone out separately. Daisy and her “ex” boyfriend’s sister are first.

They go to the Rainbow Bar. Daisy’s never been there, to the Viper Room or Whiskey – riiiight. Bret asks about Charles. Spill it, Stephanie. Charles cheated on Daisy and Daisy’s “life is black and white not color.” Bret and I have no idea what she’s talking about.

Stephanie says that the Charles relationship is over. “You’re seeing this like a guy.” Um, so I guess that I am, too. Stephanie has mastered English, though, so Bret’s getting some clarity on the situation – but not enough.

Next day: For the Destiney family date, Bret got a bike for Destiney’s parents to ride – that’s a really nice gesture. And he leads them to a tattoo parlor so that Destiney can get a tattoo. She wants the “Rock of Love” logo on the back of her neck but without the words. Is Bret disappointed that she won’t add the words to the tattoo? She’s putting it right where Heather did.

For Ambre’s date, they go for sushi and the age lie comes up. “Oh my god, I can’t believe I lied to Bret.” You said UM before you told him your age. Don’t cry, Liar. She has a career in which she needs to be younger so she told the girls that she’s 32. But she’s fallen in love with Bret – she says it in front of her dad which is kind of creepy to me.

So the date ends and back at the house, Bret thanks the families and the ex-boyfriend’s sister for coming out. Destiney’s mom is wearing an awful hat – I see where it comes from. I really hope that Destiney’s dad can somehow beat his cancer.

There was little drama in this episode but…no, I spoke spoke too soon. Ambre wants to air out some stuff. Are you gonna tell them that you’re 37? She says to Destiney: “I wasn’t sure if you’d completely given your heart to Bret.”

Destiney: “It’s hard for me to give myself 100% if I don’t know if it’s being returned.”

How is Destiney the voice of reason here? Ambre says that she feels like she’s in love with Bret. You ARE vulnerable and stupid. Speaking of stupid, Daisy says that she’s in love with Bret, too.

Elimination time – I have NO idea who’s going home.

Bret tells each of the girls what he loves about them and what their downsides are. He loves the way Daisy sings? And she has a walk-in garage of skeletons. At least he knows that he’s too old to pick through it.

Daisy tells Bret that Destiney’s not 100% in love with him. Destiney says, “I’m not in love with you but I have feelings for you.” But it doesn’t save her; he calls down Destiney and she’s going home for loving the experience and not loving Bret.

So the woman who was nearly eliminated on the first episode is in the finals with Daisy. Well, at least I can say I called one of the final two.

Next time: SEASON FINALE!!!! In the mean time, on Thursday night they’re gonna air lost moments. Like it’s some brilliant show a la Seinfeld and we need to see that…