These days, the radio is a serious disappointment. I long for the days when the number one hit was Mariah Carey singing Vision Of Love (I’m sorry but that sh*t was QUALITY). When I listen to say…something like, “This Is Why I’m Hot”, I find myself feeling so incredibly–unhot. Instead, I feel ashamed for listening to junk. Listening to most of the todays Top 40 tunes is like eating a Big Mac.

So, I’m going to bring you MY version of the good stuff, old school style, spanning several decades. Holla!

1. She’s Got A Way and Piano Man- Billy Joel
Ok, if you really want to go there….just buy a Greatest Hits album, so worth it.

2. Gypsies, Tramps and Thieves- Cher
Yeah, Cher. And no, I’m not a gay man.

3. I Have Nothing- Whitney Houston
Whitney would MURDER any of those American Idol b*tches.

4. Bennie and The Jets and Sorry Seems To Be The Hardest Word- Elton John
Elton John should be my father. I want to be his adopted baby.

5. Shower The People and Sweet Baby James- James Taylor
What better message is there than all of the worlds problems could be healed if we, “Showered the people you love with love…”

6. Go Your Own Way- Fleetwood Mac
Stevie Nicks is basically my fashion muse.

7. Dream On- Aerosmith
Don’t worry, you’re not the only one who wants to make out with Steven Tyler, I’m totally on board.

8. Gimmee Shelter- The Rolling Stones
Whoa….Steven Tyler and Mick Jagger in a three person kiss? Can you even imagine?! Holy. lips.

9. Hey Jude and Well…..everything they’ve ever done?- The Beatles
I feel spiritually connected to The Beatles. I’m truly a flower child. Am I alone?

10. Earth Song and Man In The Mirror- Michael Jackson
No “One Hit Wonder” here, though fame maybe…just maybe…drove him a little crazy.
11. Open Your Heart- Madonna
Next: Madonna runs for president.

12. Separate Lives- Phil Collins
His great songs often get overshadowed by “True Colors” and that damn Lion King song, wait- was that him?

13. Fields Of Gold- Sting
SUCH A FAN.

14. Bloody Sunday- U2
Before Bono was off saving the world, he was a badass musician…

15. Again and I Get Lonely- Janet Jackson

AND….in closing, I give you, God:

16. Prince- I don’t even need to give you a song, he’s a one word, one symbol…all-encompassing entity.

[Any other Best Of songs to add?]