In the year since I’ve graduated, I’ve noticed a startling and disheartening trend. More and more girls want to have sex. Umm, what? A guy that’s disheartened because more girls want to get wild in the sack? Well, I’m not finished. The disheartening part is that this extra love-making is seemingly coming at the expense of oral sex.

In college, oral sex was the thing to do. Girls willing to give blow-jobs were a dime-a-dozen, and even as early as freshman year, any moderately good looking guy could walk into any frat and find at least one girl willing to go down on him that night. But now? Almost every girl I’ve dated since leaving college has been far more apt to get right to the nitty-gritty than take the time to pleasure me for a while. Even when I willingly and often eagerly take the time to go down on the girl, I’ve found that she’s only very rarely willing to reciprocate.

So what gives? Most girls in their mid-20s that I’ve talked to about this phenomenon tell me that giving head is “too personal,” and that they only go down on guys whom they know, like, and feel comfortable with. And I understand that, except that I was brought up to believe that that’s how you’re supposed to feel about sleeping with people.

I mean, oral sex was abundant in college, and there’s no way that every girl who was generous enough to go down on me felt comfortable with me. At least a few didn’t like me at all! And yet, in the years since, I can’t seen to buy a blow-job. And yet I have no problem getting laid. It’s almost as if you girls all go through this awesome metamorphosis in the summer after graduation: you enter the summer as oral-sex loving caterpillars, and emerge as beautiful butterflies ready and willing to spread your wings (read: legs) while intent on keeping your mouths closed.

Here’s the crazy thing: most guys, if given the option, will take a great blow-job over good sex any day of the week and twice on Thursdays, but I’m not sure girls realize this. Girls seem to assume that guys just want to get laid, that sex is the be-all end-all for every single guy, rendering the importance of foreplay totally moot.WRONG! We love oral sex. Nay, we need it. And in the absence of it, many guys will seek it out elsewhere.

I’m not saying that you need to go down on every guy that comes around, or even every guy that you get a little freaky with. But if there’s a guy you think you might like, don’t make him wait too long. Because he won’t.