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I came across this article the other day, an article about how chivalry is dead, and my generation is the one who killed it.
To prove her point, the article’s author explained how she’s often cat called when she walks down the street, and laments about the days when men tipped their hats and said “mornin‘” instead of leering at a pair of breasts and saying “yee!”
Even though I think she’s got a point when she talks about certain forms of traditional chivalry going out the window (the last time a man tipped his hat at me was…well, never, and not once has anyone ever thrown a jacket over a mud puddle), I’m pretty sure that using cat calls to define the death of chivalry is just plain incorrect.
Look, men have been cat calling women since the day they realized their mouths made sounds and breasts were awesome. Sure, Victorian dudes opened carriage doors for us and offered their elbow when the terrain got rough, but don’t think they weren’t whistling and jeering under those handlebar mustaches and cute little bowler hats. Perhaps they weren’t shouting “aye, mami!” when a fine looking bustle walked down the street, but you can bet a Victorian chick knew when a Mr. Darcy was hating to see her leave, but loving to see her go.
Basically, cat calling sucks (especially when you’re walking back from the gym looking like a dead rat and KNOWING the only reason that creepy guy is yelling at you is because you have boobs), but just because certain men are vulgar and annoying doesn’t mean that the species as a whole has quit on us. Why, just the other day, a guy waited .5 seconds before grabbing a seat from me on the subway! He considered letting me sit for .5 seconds longer than most.
[What do you think? Is the Chiv dead? Let us know!]
6 Comments
I don’t think chivalry is dead - however, I’m in high school, and it really depends on what you allow! Boys know what they can get away with by how you react.
My boyfriend is a sweetheart, he always walks me to my car, offers me his arm when we’re dressed up, and respects women overall..I consider him quite chivalrous
I think you’ve got a point; chivalry is heading towards the door, but it seems that women are leading the way. Men are men, and when we wear clothes that invite men to look that direction- they’re going to do it. If you look at the difference between the way women dressed in the past versus the way we dress today, I think it explains a lot. If we want men to be more respectful, we have to begin by keeping the boobs in our shirts.
Even though no man should ever think it’s okay to say something degrading to a woman…the shorter our skirts are and the more booby we show — the more men are going to stare.
It’s science.
The low and poorly bred are more likely to be crude, as has always been evident. Dressing for respect keeps the cat-calls to a minimum. Also, it’s up to parents to teach their children to be polite. My boyfriend is exceptionally courteous and respectful to women, because his single mom worked her ass off and made sure her kids were going to turn out right.
I don’t think it’s our generation that killed it–I get cat called by men who are older as well as those of our generation. But the whole idea of “chivalry” seems a little sexist to me.. being polite and treating women equally and with respect is one thing, but treating women as though they are incapable of doing things themselves is another.
Also, I think it’s terrible to blame cat-calling and other similar behaviors on WOMEN. Saying “men will be men” and blaming the victim is not the solution–men need to know how to treat women with as much respect as they would (hopefully) treat their mother or sister, REGARDLESS of what she’s wearing. That’s just decency.
I’m a lot like Stephanie’s bf, I guess. Yet u all think i’m a nerd! Anyway, the boys who don’t do this stuff are the ones who never get any feedback from women. I learned a long time ago that hypocrisy is perfectly acceptable on this website, but at the end of the day, you always end up with the virile, catcalling “alpha male” you always claim to be a jerk. This is how feminism got off course–you used to be condemned to put up with whoever had the control over you and abused you, and now you use your freedom to choose your man to woo the very same men most likely to abuse you in many different ways because they take women for granted! Girl power my ass!
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