So who gave Russia permission to be the biggest buzzkill ever?

If you haven’t heard, Russia decided to go wave their giant international schlong around in the Georgian region of South Ossetia last week. And then, since Georgia’s military consists of two tanks and a three-legged dog, they decided to just run all over the damn place - go for the gold, perhaps. Oh, hey, how topical.

Russia, what gives? Were you thinking that everyone was too enthralled with the Olympics to notice? We’re not blind, Russia. We see you over there. Mr. “I’m only the Prime Minister” Putin, wipe that snide smile off your face, you’re not fooling anyone. We are ready for swift, decisive action. It’s not like we’re too busy chumming it up with the women’s volleyball team or anything.

Russia, really, we’re sorry you haven’t had a bona fide invasion in sixty-odd years. We know your country is huge and hard to invade. We know you just want to sit in your snow palaces and chortle heartily as the fascist armies starve to death on the tundra. But could you at least have waited until the world-wide quadrennial moment of community was over? Man, we really had some spirit going on.

Couldn’t the one-sided massacre of civillians in a thinly veiled land grab along with grotesque human rights violations have waited at least until after the BMX competition? Maybe?

Not like anyone’s surprised, of course. Government people have a pretty terrible record of ruining the fun of decent, normal human beings. Let’s have a look back at some of their more belligerent moments: Read More »

Ha ha!

Tom Cruise is supposed to be filming this movie right now over in Germany, playing a guy named Claus von Stauffenberg. The movie is supposed to be about a plot to kill Adolf Hitler and Tom’s character is supposed to be the leader of the unsuccessful attempt to assassinate the Nazi dictator in 1944 with a hidden bomb.

Yea, this was supposed to be happening….

Not anymore!

Reuters reports the movie has been BANNED BY GERMANY. An entire freaking country has put its foot down, not because of what the movie stands for - but because of Mr. Scientology himself.

The German government doesn’t recognize Scientology as a church, saying “it masquerades as a religion to make money.” Therefore, if film makers officially ask to shoot in Germany, they “will not be allowed to film at German military sites if Count Stauffenberg is played by Tom Cruise, who has publicly professed to being a member of the Scientology cult”.

Oh man. This is funny. See what happens when you think you’re such a hot shot that you can go off on crazy tangents, piss off and offend people with your cult-like popularity? You get shot down from doing what you’re supposed to be doing in the first place - ACTING.

Tom Cruise is nuts.

What do you think about Tom Cruise?