America’s Next Top Model is coming back for its 74th season!!

Okay, I’m exaggerating a little bit as Tyra ramps up for cycle 11. But there have been so many seasons that my beloved Fug Girls have chosen an all-star cast because the show seems to be less about modeling and more about being fierce and Tyra’s bowls of crazy and Miss J’s hair.

So where are these top models anyway? Adrianne Curry married a Brady. I see Jaslene Gonzalez on gossip sites where bloggers forever criticize her gaunt frame. I think that I’ve seen Danielle Evans in an ad or two. Karl Lagerfield, while obnoxious, is right - the show is never going to turn out the world’s next supermodel. If the show didn’t turn out ten supers before this, why keep it up?

Tyra, I beg you to stop after this cycle. Unless you can turn out another Jade for me or clone Nigel Barker for my bedroom, I’m worn out.

As we approach August, we may have started to take summer vacay for granted. In the dog days of summer, it’s easy to sleep until 2 p.m., get caught up on Maury, and not realize we still have our PJs on until it’s time to go back to bed. But with the countdown to Fall Semester ticking fast, it’s important to make the most of every spare minute. Whether you’re working your ass off or dedicated to being a lazy bum until a full courseload kicks back in, it’s time to get in gear and create some glorious summer memories.

1. Take a roadtrip. Sure, gas prices are skyrocketing, but you’re only young once, right? And once you’re shackled into a nine-to-five, you’re going to crave the spontaneity that’s currently yours for the taking. I’m a self-professed workaholic, but even I’ve been known to squeeze in a few quality roadtrips between May and August each year. One summer, I took a fourteen-hour drive to Ohio with two girls from work I barely knew, for the birthday party of one of my brother’s grad school friends. And no, my brother didn’t go. So, three random girls showed up at a party in the boondocks (aka Wooster), and promptly put on our party shoes. Liquor flowed, regrettable hook-ups were had, and the girls and I totally bonded over the experience. Even if you can only spare one day, find a town you’ve never been to before, and head out to explore. You never know what adventures might arise. Read More »

First America’s Next Top Model and now a beauty pageant? Looks like people are finally starting to get the hint that being emaciated does not equal being beautiful. Or, more importantly, that women with a little meat on their bones are still pretty damn fabulous.

Leah Green — a beautiful 22 year old girl who happens to be a size 12 – was crowned Miss London yesterday. Green beat out hundreds of rail-thin contenders to take the title. Naturally, she was ecstatic. “I was in shock, but it was amazing to receive my crown, trophy and sash. My best friend Emma burst into tears and all I could see was my boyfriend Matt’s huge smile.”

Green had been turned down by many modeling agencies before entering the Miss London competition. To Leah, this win is about more than putting her in the running for the title of Miss England; this is her chance to be a role model to curvy (read: normal) girls everywhere.

This is a wonderful day for Leah Green, but I find it frustrating that the world is so shocked and enthralled with her story. Yes, she has broken down a huge wall in the modeling and beauty industry, but should it really be this way? Should an average sized girl winning a beauty pageant really be world news?

We can only hope that Leah Green’s win will force the change that we have all been waiting for. Next stop: Miss England. We are all behind you, sister.

Sure, I’ve asked myself, “Are you into GIRLS”?

I think a lot of girls ask themselves this at some point in time or another. After all, guys and girls communicate completely differently and it can leave a girl feeling emotionally helpless. And plus, we all know women are the ones with beautiful physiques. So I have asked myself this question and yet every time, “NOPE” seems to be the answer. If that’s true, then why do I LOVE it when girls hit on me?

A girl winks at me at a bar and then tells me I’m beautiful.
A hot girl I know asks me if I want to join her in sex with her boyfriend.
A lesbian tells me she wishes I were a lesbian.

Why, oh why, am I so thoroughly delighted by all of this supposedly unwarranted attention? I think I know why…

I think it’s because girls are notoriously VICIOUS with one another. Girls judge other girls like we’re all competing on America’s Next Top Model and the prize is endless chocolate and all-expenses-paid shopping. Even if I don’t wanna make out with the girl at hand, it feels nice to know she wants to make out with me.

Am I crazy?
Or have you ever felt this way?

I did my usual perusing of NYMag.com a few days ago to find America’s Next Top Model on the homepage, with a picture of some beautiful girl and the headline that “Miss Tyra threw a curveball” by selecting the first-ever plus-sized model to win. I haven’t seen the show in many a season, because Tyra Banks continued to be Tyra Banks and you can only see a marathon so many times, but needless to say, I was intrigued.

I frowned and scrolled back up to the picture. Hm. Come to think of it, her legs don’t look like they could be snapped in two by a twelve-year-old. But plus-sized? She didn’t really look plus-sized. I was perplexed. The consistent theory was that this “oversized” model was picked from the beginning as part of Tyra’s personal agenda to make reality TV history. Or something. Making a point that you don’t have to be skinny to be pretty.

It’s a great message, it is. Except this Whitney character really isn’t not skinny. But in the context of an industry full of waifs, she instantly becomes the fat girl. It’s like picking the hottest guy in a classroom only to find that he’s less attractive on the street among other civilians; you can’t base your judgment of a person in the confines of one element. Read More »

I watch a lot of really bad TV, but I can proudly admit that I have never watched a single episode of The Tyra Banks Show. That bitch is crazy; I had enough of her antics on ANTM. That being said, after hearing that Speidi would be making an appearance on Monday’s episode, I searched the interwebs high and low to find a clip of their interview.

The highlights are below.



Having Heidi, Spencer and Tyra in one place should really cause the world to implode, no? That’s a whole lot of douche for one stage. I don’t even really know where to begin. Maybe with Heidi’s awful Heidiwood ensemble? Or the fact that she and Spencer have been denying for two years that they had anything to do with the tape, only to openly discuss it on national television? (Although, this is the Tyra show; it really doesn’t count.) Or when Spencer, so eloquently, discusses his distaste for watching Lauren’s alleged sex tape. Or, my favorite, when Heidi admits that she was in surgery (getting those boobs/lips/facelift) the day the rumor of the video hit the world.