Did you hear? Designer Vaginas were blacklisted in Australia!?

Yeah, I can’t believe it either! I mean, I am all about designer everything – bags, clothes, shoes, etc. – but I didn’t know a designer va-jay was an option! (Note: I just did some investigating and found out that this does not refer to some sort of
Louis Vuitton hoo-hah, but rather surgery to make it look prettier. Damn.)

Yeah, so basically women have been seeking out uber expensive surgery ($10,000!) to make their vaginas look more appealing. Surprisingly (pause, NOT!), some doctors are getting a little worried about this. Not only is it ridiculous to want a better lookin’ vag (let’s be honest…they aren’t the prettiest things), but the surgery is not safe and can cause long term sensitivity issues.

Um, ladies, why you so crazy? What is the point of a pretty (and overpriced) vag if you can’t enjoy it?

I’m just sayin’…

Being a sleepaway camp counselor is nothing like being a camper. If any of you forgot what camp is all about, let me give you a not-so-hypothetical situation:

You’re sitting on the side of the soccer field while the sun is drawing a tan line of your favorite flip flops on your feet. You’re at the front of the massage line (what could be better?) working on your latest pink and purple string friendship bracelet. The heat reminds you to bring your squeeze breeze to the next activity and you cannot wait for rest hour to play spit on your best friend’s top bunk, which, of course, you always win.

Since I arrived at camp, my daily activities have been slightly different. The campers have not arrived yet and my day has run a little something like this:

7:30 AM: Bugle call for wake up
8:00 AM: Breakfast (consisting of a choice of bagel, cereal, sometimes eggs , rarely bacon. Okay, not so bad) Read More »

Before I leave the house and head to the airport, I say goodbye to my one true companion: my seven-year-old pug Iris. I give her a big kiss on the cheek and squeeze her until she makes a huffy sound. “I love you, Iris,” I say to her. “You be a good girl.” Then, I give her a treat and, while she chews it, I walk out of sight. I will not be seeing her for a few months, but the reality doesn’t set in until I’m on the plane.

My friends tell me she whines the first few days, wondering where I am, and then she settles into life without me. My substitute for Iris is a plush gray neck pillow that I have brought with me on all my travels for the past five years. I sleep with my substitute and it provides me enough comfort to sustain me for the length of my trip.

Though there can be no real substitute for Iris, as a traveler, I am required to leave her behind — along with many other things. Despite missing these things, there is a profound cleansing that every traveler experiences. The value of an item is measured by its weight, size, and usefulness. The sorting between what will be brought or not quickly informs you of just how little a human really needs to survive life abroad. Read More »

In several previous posts I discussed the intense controversy surrounding the upcoming Beijing Olympics. In recent weeks the traditional international journey of the Olympic Torch has served as a flash point for clashes between supporters and protesters.

Ironically, this torch relay was supposed to be the largest in Olympic history—a showcase of international cooperation and sport. Instead, it has become a testament to international outrage over China’s human rights abuses, especially over Tibet.

March 31: A huge carefully scripted ceremony at Beijing’s Tiananmen Square sent the torch off across the globe

April 3: In Istanbul, Turkey, the Uighur expat community staged demonstrations against Chinese persecution of their “brother” expats in Xinjiang. In February 2007, for example, an Uigur activist named Ismail Semed, was executed on the shaky grounds of attempting to “split the motherland” and possessing explosives.

April 6: Massive clashes occurred between Free Tibet protesters and police during the London relay. Thirty-seven protesters were arrested including a man who tried to snatch the torch away from one of the runners. Another tried to put out the torch with a fire extinguisher. Read More »

The first few minutes of Oxfam International (a “confederation of 13 organizations working together with over 3,000 partners in more than 100 countries to find lasting solutions to poverty and injustice“)’s new exhibit seem normal enough: multimedia presentations detailing refugee experiences, timelines of various conflicts, and lots of photos. Suddenly, however, things drastically change—the model house you are standing in seems to be under attack!

While some group members hide, you and a few others escape into what appears to be a jungle of sorts. Still in disbelief at this turn of events, you stumble on into what looks like a desert… full of land mines. You successfully avoid the explosions and make it to a border crossing. The guards hassle your group ruthlessly, you get pulled aside for questioning, but, finally, after what seems like an eternity, they allow you into the country.

Just beyond the border is a refugee camp where you are told you will be able to stay temporarily. At the entrance you register and formally ask the government for asylum… unreality hits—you are a refugee, no home, no nationality, and most likely not even a complete family.

Freaky right? To be honest I’m not sure I would be able to deal with it. But according to the project’s director Stephanie Cousins, that is the desired effect; Read More »

You know how everyone’s telling teenage girls to stay away from drugs, sex, and bitchy behavior?

Well, someone wants to put a stop to all the preaching.

Coolest Girl in School, a “mobile phone based game” (a term which makes me feel old, since I have no idea what it is) is about to debut in Australia, and parents are pissed.

“Game developer and producer” Holly Owen, the (no) brains behind this new game, says that the point behind Coolest Girl is to “”lie, bitch and flirt your way to the top of the high school ladder“, a description that makes me think Owen has “cool” confused with “total asshole”.

“It’s not about glorifying bad things, it’s about giving young girls the opportunity to play around with high school.” Owen says about her horrible idea, going on to muse “It’s a pretty ironic game because things that might seem obviously cool like taking drugs and smoking might work against you because you have to go to rehab or have stinky breath when the captain of the football team comes to speak to you.” Read More »

The Veronicas: Hook Me Up

Today’s as good a day as any to post a cheesy video, right? Sometimes I love music like this, it puts a smile on my face. You too? Get it here!

I don’t have many regrets from college.

I don’t regret that “B” I got in English my sophomore year because I opted to go to a date party instead of the library. I don’t regret hooking up with a good friend, even if it turned out horribly ugly in the end. I don’t even regret catching a terrible cold that lasted 3 weeks after wrestling in Jell-O in the middle of October…in Michigan.

But if there is one thing I do regret from my years of undergrad it is that I never went abroad.

When my friends first started discussing going abroad for Junior year I was wary. Living in another country sounded interesting, but I was worried about being half way around the world for such a long time. I would miss my family. I would miss my friends. I would definitely miss late night pizza in Ann Arbor.

My friends moved forward, signed up to study in Australia and I opted out in favor of more time in good ole’ Michigan.

And I didn’t regret my decision…then. I had a great time! While it seemed like everyone I knew was going to be abroad, I ended up having tons of friends stick around Michigan with me. We all got a ton closer, I got more active in things around campus, I had an awesome spring break and it was a really fun semester (turning 21 helped, obviously). So what if my friends were off in Australia learning how to surf, camping in the rainforest or travelling through East Asia on their way home? Ann Arbor was just as great.

Then I graduated, got a job and realized that I only get 2 weeks of vacation time a year. Not nearly enough time for me to settle into another country, experience other cultures or see the world.

And the regret sunk in. Read More »

• If your ringtone is going to be an orgasm (ugh, totally lame), turn it off before you are in the midst of a courtroom. Manners, people! (news.com.au)

• London residents panic over chemical spill…I mean, 5-alarm chili! Literally. (timesonline.co.uk)

• Alabama woman: “My motto has been they are going to have to pry this vibrator from my cold, dead hand. I refuse to give up.” Haven’t we all thought that at some point? (TBO.com)

• Father makes 6 year old son chug a beer. Hilarity does not ensue. (tbo.com)

• An Alabama couple celebrates their 80th wedding anniversary. “After all these years,” he said, “I still enjoy being with her.” Does this give us hope or does it make us morbidly depressed? I’m going with depressed. (sfgate.com)

• Ditzy cheerleader bloopers are always a great way to wake up in the morning. (COED Magazine)

Every day someone muses about how fast kids are growing up in today’s society; how sexually charged their lives are, how full of mixed messages.

“Kids don’t get to be kids anymore!” is what everyone seems to be saying, “They’re becoming inexperienced adults!”

I don’t usually buy all our hyper-sexualized tween hysteria (I’m pretty sure most of this stuff has been going on for decades—just without YouTube), but after coming across this story, I can’t help but wonder what the hell is going on.

According to sources, a 6-year-old boy was recently caught running a ‘sex club’ out of his elementary school in Melbourne, Australia.

The boy has recently been placed in counseling for allegedly urging another 6-year-old to “perform a sex act” and “expos[ing] himself in front of other students.”

It’s hard to tell if parents and school officials are blowing an innocent act of kindergarten rebellion out of proportion (as we are want to do these days), or if our culture has really and truly gone off the deep end in terms of sexual exposure. Read More »