[College kids are notorious for being poor. And why shouldn’t we be? We take out student loans to pay for private universities, can barely balance a part-time job with our full-time courseload, and the only “balance” we’re familiar with refers to the number of points left on our dining hall cards. Oh, did I mention many of us tend to splurge every extra penny on PBR’s at the campus bar?

If you disagree with everything I just said, you probably don’t need this column. But if you’re nodding along because you’re officially an adult and still don’t know how to manage your money, then you might want to pay attention every week, because I’m going to (try to) get you through this, and make you a successful saver and a wise spender.]

I’ve been writing a lot about how to manage your money in bank accounts and with credit and debit cards. That’s the tricky stuff. As poor students, we are good at finding bargains and at least trying to make our money go a long way. That said, it’s easy to fall into certain traps when what we think is a good “deal” comes our way…and we end up paying dearly. Here are some scams to avoid in order to really save some dough.

1. Gym Memberships.

Beware of whatever type of deal a gym is trying to pitch to finagle you into joining. Why? Because they are probably lying. Okay, I’m bitter about this one. I needed to join a new gym at home for a couple of months, so I signed up for free guest passes at all the gyms in my area so I could work out for free and not buy anything. Next thing I knew, a Bally’s rep was selling me a special offer: $25 a month for a membership that I could transfer anywhere. He told me that if I got back to school and didn’t want to make the trek to the nearest Bally’s, I could freeze my membership for $4 a month, and when i started using their clubs again, I could continue to pay the dirt cheap fee.

The reality? Only the first transfer would be free, so I’d be paying in the future for every new Bally’s I tried to switch to; the “freeze” thing didn’t exist, and I was forced to pay the monthly fee even though I wasn’t working out; I’m stuck in a year contract, and now I have an express hatred for Bally Total Fitness Clubs. Needless to say: gyms are definitely places to read the fine print. Read More »

When I moved to college, the first thing I did after unpacking my shower caddy and twin extra long sheets was buy a parking spot. I had to have my car. Had to. It gets cold in Colorado, obviously, so walking all over campus in the winter was not an option. Plus, I got so used to having a car for errands, Costco runs, etc., that I just couldn’t bear to be without one.

I am sure most students feel the same way, especially since I can never find anywhere to park on campus these days. Ugh. Why do I even have a car if I can’t use it to drive to class?!

But I digress.

All of this campus street congestion that is no doubt a problem on college campuses nationwide has led many schools to start a revolution…with bikes.

The University of New England is one of a few schools (that will soon be many) that is offering free bikes to any student who leaves their car at home. Other schools are setting up bike share programs, which entice students to pedal around campus instead of hopping in the car. These schools are hoping that by giving students a real alternative, they will not feel the need to bring their car to campus.

And it looks like it’s all working - for more than just the parking sitch:

“We did it as a means of reducing the need for parking, but as we looked at it from the standpoint of fitness, health and sustainability, we realized we have the opportunity to create a change.”

The whole idea is really quite smart. By opting for a bike instead of a car you could help the environment, save money on parking (and parking tickets…), get healthy, and free up some of those parking spots for the rest of us reduce the number of cars clogging your campus streets. And all for free!

This looks like a total win/win.

[It doesn’t matter what school you go to, what state it is in, how big it is, whether it is public or private, all girls or coed…there are experiences that all college students share. No matter how crazy you think your personal situation is, it is not just you.

So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

The Drunk Email:

The boy you love just broke your heart, so your girlfriends decide that drinking is in order. Because nothing numbs the pain quite like a few shots of SoCo. Together with your roommates, you pick out a super hot outfit (consisting of some combination of low cut top/push up bra), take a few pre-gaming shots and head out the door to either “show him what he’s missing,” or “forget about that prick.” Read More »

[Every week, CC and John will bring you some of the weirdest, funniest, saddest things he hears on his college campus. Join the Overheard revolution! Leave your own overheard convos in the comments.]

Excited, rushing conversation, behind a closed door:
“And then this guy… he just, like, whipped out a trombone! And then some other guy just pulled out a harmonica! And then… and then someone had to do his laundry!”

A girl, holding up a bottle of vodka: “It’s my dildo! The best kind - the kind that has alcohol in it.”

Two girls arguing at a party:
“I’m gonna punch your cock off!”
“I don’t have a cock!”
“I wish you did - so I could punch it off!”

A dude walks into an apartment, carrying a keg.
“Wait,” asks another guy. “Is that, like, for drinking?”
“Nah, I think I’m gonna bathe in it, first. Hey, is that pizza? Maybe I’ll rub that all over my body while I’m at it.”

A girl at the library, in the stacks, as loudly as possible: “Listen. So then I talked to my doctor, and then my gynecologist, and he put me on birth control - but he says I still need to use condoms when I’m f***ing my boyfriend, because I might get syphilis! I know, right?” Read More »

“The Barack you saw on that [debate] stage was the Barack I’ve known all my life: smart, calm, respectful, intelligent, connected. There’s only one candidate in this race who will bring that tone and tenor to the White House.”

Michelle Obama, speaking to students at Keene State College in Keene, NH yesterday.

[Is it important to you that our next President be seen as calm and respectful, or is tough and powerful more to your liking?]

Most college students like to think that all the drugs and alcohol in the world are at their fingertips once they hit campus. But for us under-agers there are some off-limits places, such as certain bars and clubs. If you’re wondering about the secret world of the 21 and overs, you might start thinking about getting a fake ID. From personal experience, and the experiences of my friends who have fakes, there are a few things you need to ask yourself before coughing up enough cash for an ID.

What am I going to be using it for? If you’re buying a fake primarily just to buy your friends booze every once in awhile, it’s probably not worth it to go through the whole process of getting one. It would be easier to just find an older friend to buy for you. If you want one to get into concerts, bars, clubs, comedy clubs, etc., with friends who also have fakes or who are older, then it’s more beneficial for you to have one. This way you’re at least getting your money’s worth, and you know for sure you have others who can join you in your illegal adventures.

Who am I buying one off of? Some of my friends have gotten fakes from a random sketchy place down in Chinatown. Even though they only paid 60 bucks for it, the ID says that it’s not government issued and a lot of places haven’t accepted them. Needless to say, they got sh*tty fakes. Read More »

It’s been a while since a turned 18 and became legal, but I’m a little embarrassed to admit that I have never cast a vote — not for a local, state, or national election. My first opportunity to vote was the midterm elections in 2006, and I just wasn’t informed enough about the House and Senate to make a smart decision. So I didn’t.

The other thing that paralyzed me, and that made me think it wouldn’t matter if I voted even in the presidential election, was the electoral college. I’m from good old Massachusetts — you know, the first state to legalize gay marriage, the so-blue-we-don’t-even- see-the-color-red state, the most liberal state in the union. There is never a contest about who wins our state’s votes. In fact, the politicians don’t even try; in the last election, I didn’t see a single presidential campaign ad.

So why bother voting? My vote amounts to a spit in the wind, and as long as we’re not talking about national popular vote as an option, things are going to stay that way. Still, though, I felt a renewed urge to cast my vote this year, because more than ever it seems like a year when a tremendous amount is at stake. Like hundreds of millions of others, I’ve seen my country slowly going down the tubes in the past eight years. It’s gotten a lot harder to be proud of my country, and I see the ideals it stands for increasingly obscured by smoke.

That’s when I found out that several states — including my college’s state of New Jersey — have voted to pledge their electoral votes to the winner of the national popular election. Hot damn, my vote counts for one vote again! It’s a very exciting and rebellious move on the part of several states who are tired of only Ohio and Pennsylvania getting all the love.

So I registered! Read More »

5. Put YouTube terminals in the voting booths
You wanna know something? Us college kids are really just big magnets. If you open a dumb video of an overweight thirteen year-old kid singing a pop song from the Falkland Islands, every single student within a mile will be chuckling over your shoulder within fifteen seconds.

If our presidential candidates really want to get the 18-24 crowd out and voting, they should start making films of themselves running drunk and naked across the interstate. Right now, candidates are mostly remembered for being a bunch of lumpy old guys who still haven’t lowered the drinking age. They can do so much better: the McCain/Romney version of “Daft Bodies”, for example, would totally steal the election. I’d vote for them.

4. “Reframe the debate”
This year, the American people are concerned with economic something and whatever with foreclosure blah blah drilling offshore and climate change, very important to something Iraq timetable mumble mumble. Man! The issues are tiring! I need a nap!

So it’s not surprising that college students don’t get out to rep their favorite pols. All they talk about is boring crap that sucks! You know what college kids like? Movies. It’s what we care about. “Iraq” is far away and hard to pronounce properly. All those cutthroat late-night debates need to be centered around the real questions — the tough questions, the ones that will get students waving big posters and burning their underwear.

“I understand that Christian Bale’s a great Batman, Senator Obama, but what’s up with that police run-in? In light of his creepy bevhavior, have you reconsidered your recent “pro-shirtless Bale” position?” “Senator McCain, what’s your stance on Pierce Brosnan singing ABBA? Awful enough to be funny, or just awful enough to suck?” “If elected, what measures do the candidates plan to take to ensure that George Lucas doesn’t ruin another franchise, ever?” Read More »