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It\'s Holiday Season!

Welcome to holiday season! Sure,
you may not be able to shop, shop,
shop like you usually do this time of
year (thank you, Wall Street!), but
that doesn’t make it any less glorious!
There’s the music! And the movies!
And the general good mood of everyone
around you. We, like everyone else,
loooove
this time of year…and we don’t
even celebrate Christmas!
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Are You Scared Sh*tless Yet?: Allstate’s Horribly Depressing Ad Campaign

The time has come for someone to say something.  The madness has to stop.  What madness am I talking about?  Those effing Allstate Commercials. You know, the ones that make you afraid to do anything?  The ones that have you scared to even look at your car for fear of instant bad luck or even death?  Yeah.  Those.

I’m not sure which Allstate bigwig hired Debbie Downer as their ad executive, but whoever decided depressing people into buying insurance was a good idea should be punched in the eye.

Below are a few of the offending commercials we found on YouTube.  Not surprisingly, most of the worst ones did not show up.  This is probably because Allstate knows they’re being f*cktards.


The “If You Try To Drink Coffee While Driving, You Will Get Into A Serious Accident And Probably Break Your Neck” Allstate commercial

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Living at Home in College: The Road Less Traveled

home-parents-college.jpgI am the biggest. idiot. ever. Why? Because I will be spending one dreaded semester at home. That’s right, I gave up my freedom so that I could come home to spend a little extra time with the ‘rents. No, I’m not one of those people who can’t bear to spend time away from my parents, I just made a couple of mistakes…well, let’s call them choices

Rewind to the end of senior year when a certain girl was debating between College A and College B. College A is the largest school in North Carolina, is very serious about their sports program (which means tons of fans to party with, plus I love college football) and just happens to be an hour from my boyfriend. College B is a smaller but well-known school located right in the middle of a booming city not to far from my home in Virginia that also happens to house an insane Arts/Fashion program.

Of course, naive senior Amber picked College A so she could get a degree in Fashion but still tailgate, party like crazy and spend time with her beau.

One cringe-worthy break up, one failed class, dozens of racial/socioeconomic clashes and too many drunken nights later I decided that it was time to transfer. My decision was a good one, but was made too late; by the time I submitted my application to another school (College C, I guess), it was impossible to receive housing and a decent financial aid package. Then I remembered good ol’ College B with the awesome Fashion program and decided going there was worth spending one semester at a sh*tty community college while having to obey Mom and Pop’s rules.

Some of you may have decided (or been forced) to stay at home too, or maybe I’m just hoping I’m not the only one that gets upset when I see those back to school commercials with all the cute dorm furniture and kids running through campus. Either way, there are pros and cons to movin’ back in with the rents and I know all about them: Read More »

JC Penny Bastardizes ‘The Breakfast Club’

The Breakfast Club is one of the best movies ever made, but the older I get, the more I realize younger generations probably have no idea who John Hughes is, let alone the reasons why his film about 5 high schoolers was so revolutionary. That being said, I’m not sure this new commercial by JC Penny is the way to teach them.

For some reason, this homage to the original film pisses me off. I can’t quite figure out why. Maybe because I can’t see anyone except the original cast members doing those awkward library dances. Maybe it’s hearing that iconic song totally misused. Or maybe there’s just something inherently wrong with turning a beloved film into a vehicle for consumerism.


What do you think? Smart advertising, or wrong in every way?

Anti-Smoking Ads Don’t Work Anymore; It’s The Truth

truth.bmpRemember when The Truth first started? Way back in 1998, it was a little grassroots organization dedicated to putting out the truth about the tobacco industry. I was only 11 back then, but I still thought it was pretty cool that there were people hitting the streets and just talking to people about how harmful cigarettes can be.

But I know you guys have seen the recent Truth commercials. Sure, they’re still sort of living up to their name. Still, it seems like they’re more interesting in getting the shocked “WTF?” reaction out of people instead of educating them.

Most people in my family don’t smoke. I happen to be allergic to cigarette smoke, and I have asthma, so taking a puff for me would kind of be like committing suicide. One of my aunts smoked until the day she died about seven or eight years ago. My other aunt stopped smoking shortly after. I have a bunch of friends who smoke, though. And no matter how much lecturing they get, I know that most of them are not going to stop smoking. Hell, I remember asking a friend of mine at school if he thought he would ever quit smoking. He laughed. Then coughed. Read More »

CC Staff Rant: Activia = Impressive. Yoplait = HATE

You know how sometimes Friday rolls around, and your week has been really long, and some weird lady on the bus stared at you the whole way to work for no reason, and the guys in your office keep trying to get you to watch something you’re positive is gross and will scar you for life?

Yeah. It’s been one of those weeks.

So when we here at CC have one of those weeks, we sort of just talk about whatever we want — let it all hang out. Our filters have been corded by a week filled with strippers, bikini issues, porn, lists that piss people off, and of course, Guido dancing.

11.jpg Read More »

Got the Single Girl Holidays Blues? You’re Not Alone

lonely

“I hate these commercials!”

Throwing a pillow at the TV, my roommate pressed her fingers into her eyes and squeezed her eyes shut, doing everything she could to totally block out the tinkling piano and embracing couple on the screen. Another diamond commercial, another reason to feel lonely during the holidays.

If you think you’re the only single girl this holiday season, think again. All across the world, women are pressing the mute button on commercials where a happy wife is drowning in diamonds, staring at the big empty space occupying December 31st on their calendars with dread, and wondering if it’s possible to actually meet someone cute at an office Christmas party.

Living the single life can be difficult at times, but the holiday season tends to highlight those difficulties with an extra harshness. Read More »

America’s Next Top Model Goes International

heather antm covergirlPack your bags—you’re going to China with America’s Next Top Model!

The drama began almost as soon as the girls arrived, when the six of them fought over the five beds in their penthouse. And by “fought,” I mean that Saleisha grabbed a bed for herself that was clearly huge enough for at least two people or an orgy or something. She refused to share it with Heather, which the rest of the girls, namely Bianca, found soooo funny.

Heather failed to get the joke, as did I.

The models head to movie studio where the girls are taught martial arts, and then are immediately put to the test when they have to do the poses…on wires, suspended in air. Bianca continues to annoy me when she manages to come across bitchy talking about her fear of heights and how she’d rather be shopping.

I guess I agree with her on something—I’d rather she was shopping than in the competition too! She refuses to go up and it’s Heather that wins the challenge. And her prize, ironically, is a shopping spree.

The next morning, the girls head to shoot a CoverGirl ad and commercial, which always makes me cringe with second-hand embarrassment. Saleisha is first shooting the commercial, and totally kills it. Heather fell flat, even with Mr. Jay feeding her the lines, and I died a little bit inside watching it. Chantal makes it work too, but when Lisa gets up there, she looks like she’s about to cry.

And then she does. I wish I could make fun of her, but I’ve been known to throw up from nerves before reading a speech in class, so I’m not really one to talk here. Read More »

Erin Fetherston for Target!

I don’t know if any of you saw The Hills this week, but if you did manage to catch it, did you notice something unusual?

There was an entire commercial break dedicated to Erin Fetherston’s new line debuting at Target on November 18th! Talk about creating a buzz and “targeting” (sorry, I had to) your demographic!

That said, I may or may not be leaving the city and heading to my parents house in Pennsylvania this weekend. I may or may not be doing so to do a little pre-Black Friday shopping.

This may or may not involve a trip to a (huge) Target store in Delaware in order to land a few pieces from the new line.

Don’t call me pathetic! First of all, it’s smart so don’t hate. Two, if you know anything about New York City you know that Targets do exist (in the Bronx and Queens…no thanks) but like many urban superstores, they are so picked through that there’s no way I’d find anything. Especially in my size.

Why am I making this seemingly useless trip? Well, have you seen the line? It’s absolutely adorable. But not in a little girl way. It’s really just effortless and playful…exactly my style. Read More »