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It\'s Holiday Season!

Welcome to holiday season! Sure,
you may not be able to shop, shop,
shop like you usually do this time of
year (thank you, Wall Street!), but
that doesn’t make it any less glorious!
There’s the music! And the movies!
And the general good mood of everyone
around you. We, like everyone else,
loooove
this time of year…and we don’t
even celebrate Christmas!
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Nip/Tuck Gets a Reality Check

nip tick dylan walsh

Not only is reality tv dominating networks worldwide, but now it’s also inching it’s way into actual tv shows — i.e. our dear Nip/Tuck.

Although I must admit last night’s episode was a nice switch up from the status quo with the “Plastic Fantastic” title and theme song (that was hilarious), I doubt I’d ever feel as much love for the show if it continued that way. The drama was just too forced and completely exaggerated. It had never been more apparent to me that reality tv thrives on creating conflict even if there may or may not have been any to begin with.

I mean, we have Olivia and Liz making a love connection, Christian spilling the beans to Julia, Julia flipping out at the two lesbos and begging the cameras not to capture her emotional breakdown, while Eden races in after escaping from rehab and finally gets Sean to kiss her and Christian plays the guy who just wants to “help out.” It was total madness, well more than usual anyway.

It would of been way over the top if Kimber and Matt stormed in crying that their baby is addicted to crystal meth. Read More »

Nip/Tuck Confronts Addiction

kimber niptuckAddiction. I felt like that was a pretty big theme in last night’s episode. No?

First we had the trainwrecks, Matt and Kimber living in a dump with their newborn baby, who might as well be smoking crystal meth too. Not to mention their brush with gay porn to make money to feed their habit, but I’ll get into that later.

And last, but certainly not least, there was the headcase Eden (with the bad hair) who probably would’ve become addicted to all three pill prescriptions that Christian gave her if he didn’t crack his whip and send her to rehab. Side note: I think she exaggerates her heterosexuality because her mom is a lesbo. But that’s just me.

Anyway, let the dissecting begin.

I am dying to know what will happen to Matt and Kimber’s baby. That poor thing may just cry itself to death. But I guess they aren’t completely terrible parents. I mean, they did bring her to the daycare center at the porn production studio. Um, seriously?

Since we’re on the topic of porn, Matt getting into the gay porn biz, is kind of hilarious. If I remember correctly, doesn’t he like to do guys? He may not have gone through with it this time, but I have a sneaking suspicion that he might consider it again since Kimber is now doing their drug dealer.

Now, on to Miss Eden. This bitch deserved to have her ass handed to her by Christian. Yes, he is so unbelievably shady and manipulative, but I really couldn’t help but adore him at this very moment. I never saw it coming. However, I have no doubt that Eden will return with some god awful scheme to get back at him.

Oh so exciting! Read More »

Who Wants to See Stephanie Tanner’s Uterus?

You know how I know it’s gonna be a great day? Because the first thing I saw on the Internet this morning was a big, fat picture of the uterus of Stephanie Tanner, a.k.a Jodie Sweetin.

Didn’t you know uteruses of old T.G.I.F stars are good luck? It’s true.

Stephanie Tanner, who spent 9 unforgettable years causing shenanigans and making me jealous on Full House, (Tommy Page is so dreamy) with the same expression on her face, is now preggers! Not only that, but she sent her ultrasound pics to TMZ for what I can only guess is some hopeful media attention. Man, what some people will do….rather unnecessary if you ask me, but this is much better attention than her addiction to meth! Wee-hoo!

But Stephanie isn’t the only one with new developments (and in her case, developments also means “boob job”). Some updates on the fam:

Danny Tanner, a.k.a Bob Saget, recently had an HBO comedy special. Too bad it sucked. If you’re gonna do a whole bit on animal sex and incessantly curse, make it funny. Read More »

Cheese Heroin NOT Low - Fat

cheese-heroinA shocking new drug epidemic has emerged in Texas. Since 2005, 21 Dallas - area teens have overdosed on “cheese heroin,” a potent mixture of black tar heroin and Tylenol PM. The highly dangerous combination of downers is highly accessible and frighteningly cheap. In Dallas, where a gram of cheese heroin sells for $10 (a hit can be as little as $2), the drug has become as ubiquitous as pot. The feds are all up in arms about the lure of the cheese spreading to other states.

The underground drug world never ceases to amaze me. What will they come up with next? Milkshake crack? Thank God I’m lactose - intolerant.

To read the whole story, click here.

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