Midterms are still weeks away, and already you can’t stand your roommate. Being forced to share such small quarters as a dorm room with another person can take its toll on one’s sanity. Perhaps you got a random roommate, and the two of you just never clicked, or maybe you chose to room with a friend, only to find that spending every waking moment with her is a nightmare. You want to do a housing swap, but you’re settled into your room. Problem is, so is she. The gauntlet has been thrown; how do you make her move out?

1.Leave Passive-Agressive Notes.
The PAN is a surefire way to irk any person who gets it. You know what I’m talking about: Post-It notes that are written in a polite tone of voice, yet irritate you more than your mom nagging you to clean your room in high school. In fact, often the PAN comes off as sounding like your mom. I’m getting annoyed just thinking about PANs! So, use this technique to get under the roommate’s skin. Read More »

Despite all of you who are going off to college in the fall, moving thousands of miles away from dear old mom and dad, there are a few of us who choose to remain close to home. So close in fact, that we don’t even have to move. That’s right, I’m talking about living with your parents throughout college. Lucky (or not so lucky) for me and my peers, my hometown has our very own, reputable university. And with my college fund having the capacity to cover my entire undergrad at Lakehead or only ONE year at another school, the choice was pretty simple for me.

I know, I know, many of you are shocked. Isn’t a key part of the college experience the independence you gain living in dorms? You have to learn to cook, clean, do laundry and manage your own time! And what about rules? People always question how I live under my parents thumb at 19. And I do agree, it’s definitely not easy to abide by rules when I could be making my own, under my own roof.

Bar none, the best part about living on your own for school is the freedom. When you move out of your childhood home, curfew and chores go out the window! If you want to come home at 5AM every night (or morning depending on how you look at it), that’s totally possible. But with mom and dad sleeping soundly and working the next morning, even if your curfew is non-existent, you still can’t help but feeling guilty. After all, you’re still bumming off of them. Read More »

With a hectic schedule of classes, papers, exams, and keg parties, it can be easy to let your dorm room look like a dumpster threw up in it. Besides allowing notecards and empty beer cans pile up, it’s a damn pain in the ass to cart your shizz to the laundry room and spend some precious change that could be valuable on Quarter Drafts night at the campus bar. Then there’s the process of remaking your bunkbed.

However, neglecting your sheets for too long can result in some icky, unwanted guests– and I don’t mean the one-night mistake you made last Saturday. Here are the five nastiest things that should inspire you to grab the Tide and make a date with the washing machine.

1. Bed Bugs

Reports of bed bugs are rising on college campuses and even if you’re particularly clean, you may not be safe. The little bastards can catch a ride to your room on luggage, clothing, and old furniture (e.g. your hand-me-down futon). Plus, they can live up to a year without a feeding, so they could have been hiding out in your empty dorm room for the whole summer just waiting for you to move in and unpack. Luckily, pest control on college campuses is prepared to snuff the buggers via steam, extreme heat, or pesticides. If you wake up with little red welts from bedbug bites report it immediately before the infestation spreads down the hall.

2. Your Personal Sheddings

When we hit the sack every night, we shed dry, dead skin and hair. Gross. I gag at the site of a hair-clogged shower drain, and sleeping with hairballs seems just as unappealing. Girls with long hair shed a lot, so there’s also the chance that you’ve left your mark in your man’s bed as well. Of course, dead skin and strands of hair are a breeding ground for microorganisms, so bacteria can escalate after just a few nights of shedding in your sleep. Read More »

School is approaching, and as returning sophomores, juniors and seniors, many already know what that means. But you incoming freshmen, giddy with excitement, you probably can’t stop thinking about what adventures there are to be had on the quad, throwing Frisbees and crap. You probably don’t know what to do with yourselves during your last week in your ‘stupid, boring town.’

Let me help.

I don’t want to make college sound like incarceration, and indeed the possibilities for fun are numerous, but there many things that definitely will not happen once you arrive on campus. Here are things you should enjoy in your last week at home.

1) Quiet Time

College is noisy as balls. Normal dorms are noisy, quiet dorms are noisy, the library is noisy. The only guaranteed silence you may have at your disposal is if you’re a music student with access to sound proof booths. Everyone has speakers and they all want to share their music with you! So in your last week of boring old home, just sit outside (or in your room if outside is noisy), close your eyes, and enjoy the sound of absolutely nothing. It is soon to be replaced with ‘WOOOOOO’ and “seriously let me in I need to PEE.”

2) Food without chemicals

I would say ‘good old home cookin’ but who knows if you enjoy that. The real point here is that the food you eat on campus, while edible and in a lot of cases yummy, has a certain…difference. I don’t know if it’s a laxative, or sedative to keep students in line, but something is in the food. It’s not dangerous but it will make you take dumps 20 minutes after every meal, on the dot. The regularity is nice, but also a little worrisome. Read More »

[Read the previous installment of my study abroad experience, I Could Really Use a “Not For Tourists” Guide About Now]

Alright, you’ve just arrived in a new city, eager to explore all it has to offer and excited for classes to begin. Making friends should be easy, right? Well, maybe not…

As I mentioned before, I arrived in Dublin well before my classes started, so I had to wait a few weeks to meet the people in my program. I assumed I’d meet people in my dorm, but I soon realized that a) my dorm only had 12 single rooms and b) no one had moved in yet. Damn. One morning I heard signs on life on my floor, so I went into the communal kitchen to have a look. There I met Colin, who immediately informed me that he knew everything about our school because he went there for undergrad and his masters and now his PhD, and his dad was some important dean. He talked my ear off for an hour, including as many details as possible (including the fact that he had JUST moved out of his parents house…shocking!), until I finally managed to excuse myself. Good lord. Read More »

Ah, spring. The bees are buzzing. The birds are singing. The flowers are blooming. It’s gorgeous outside, all sun and bright colors and cool green grass. All you really want to do is take your textbooks outside and do your work on the green. Mostly because your room is a complete and utter mess.

Spring cleaning is that thing you hear about that usually applies to houses, right? Wrong. Spring cleaning can apply to apartments and dorms, too. The smaller a space is, the more cluttered it gets and the more quickly it happens. Before you know it, you have to shovel a path from the door to your bed – and you do NOT have the time to clean it up.

But it doesn’t have to be that way. You don’t need an hour or two to clean your room; just 15 minutes will do. Muchly inspired by Fly Lady’s 15 Minute de-cluttering guide, here’s how to get your dorm or even your bedroom clean (or at least, cleaner) in just a quarter of an hour. Read More »

Controversy is brewing at the State University of New York at Old Westbury, where school officials have recently started to enforce an old rule that requires on-campus residents to maintain at least a 2.0 GPA.

The New York Times reports that one student, whose grades slipped due to an illness during exam week, received a letter informing her of this policy only days before the spring semester. She was also dropped from the meal plan, and her ID card no longer allowed her access to her dorm, making even clearing out her belongings difficult. Read More »

When I lived in the dorms I was always looking for a way to make food preparation really quick. Also, in case you were wondering, the healthy factor wasn’t really an issue. Pickles for breakfast, yogurt for a meal, leftovers at midnight. If it was in the fridge, I’d eat it.

Then came weekends, when my hungover ass would stumble out of bed in search of aspirin, water, and food. I was craving a homemade meal. I usually got…like, Saltines or something. So leave it to science to come up with the best thing ever created when it comes to both eating and being lazy.

Spray Pancakes!

You guys, it’s like that spray cheese crap your mom would never buy because “it wasn’t real food”! It’s like whipped cream only you can chew it! It’s the future!

If you’re like me you probably want to see it in action, so here you go. Prepare to be amazed:

But on those hungover mornings, try not to mix it up with your Reddi-Whip…I imagine that batter isn’t good for aching stomachs.