Fact: I love famous men. Love them. No matter what movie or TV show I’m watching or what gossip magazine I’m reading, I can always pick out at least one person that I would totally ride the Sexy Train to Dirtytown with. (Example? The other day I was chatting with my lady friend about the do-ability of Jerry Seinfeld. No joke.)

But despite all their fame and money and ready access to plastic surgery, there are some celebrities that are too terrifying even for a fame skank like myself to consider acceptable. Here’s a rundown of the top five male celebs I’d rather saw my leg off than get nekkid with. Read More »

We all have them. Those celebrities we can’t help liking, even though we can’t quite figure out why. They may not be traditionally attractive, but whether they have a fabulous talent or just make you happy, you find yourself swooning over them. I call them embarrassing celebrity crushes and I’ve been known to have many of them. No need to make fun of me; trust me, my friends do it more than enough.

My Top 5 Embarrassing Celebrity Crushes:

1) Donny Osmond

You know it’s bad when your friend texts you “over 100 Osmonds on Oprah,” and 5 minutes later your mom calls and says, “Donny is on Oprah!!” And my response? “Duh. It’s a rerun; I’ve seen it already.” Seriously though, how can you not think this man is adorable? His smile makes me melt and when he sings “Puppy Love,” I want to jump him. I saw him in concert, and yes, I was the only person under 45. And I am OK with that…men like younger women, right? Read More »

In case you live under a rock, Britney Spears has officially gone crazier than any of us thought possible.

After freaking her sh*t last Thursday night when it came time to return her two sons to their less insane parent, Spears participated in a three-hour standoff before being rushed to a hospital on a stretcher and checking herself out less than 48 hours later (apparently too early for people admitted with psychological issues). While nobody’s saying exactly why Spears was taken to Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, it’s been reported that at the time of her hospitalization, she was “under the influence of an unknown substance”.

As if the circus wasn’t big enough, TV’s favorite media-whore “therapist” Dr. Phil got himself involved in Brit’s debacle, visiting her as she was checking out of the hospital and subsequently telling every news outlet that he was “very concerned” for her.

“My meeting with Britney and some family members this morning in her room at Cedars leaves me convinced more than ever that she is in dire need of both medical and psychological intervention.” The TV doc is quoted as saying. “She was released moments before my arrival and was packing when I entered the room. We visited for about an hour before I walked with her to her car. I am very concerned for her.” Read More »

I get it. Guys like sex…and guys like competition. So naturally, guys make it a competition to see who has more sex. Whether it is a points game (extra points for threesomes or two girls in one night-obvi) or just listing off their sex stats. Guys go out in search of a hookup to add to their list.

And so, the number-game-guys seek out one of us girls to take home. And we ladies cast the fact aside that he is, admittedly a huge MW (Man-Whore), and strip right down to our Hanky-Panky’s. I mean, clearly if everyone else wanted him, there must be something appealing that we should want too. And naively we think we will be the one to change him and tame him. Right?

Soooo Wrong. Read More »

Whenever I happen to look up from the piles and stacks of work on my desk, flip through (mostly) bad TV, or go out with friends to a bar where I usually can’t afford more than an ice cold Pabst, the same realization dawns on me time and time again. Everyone is pairing off! …or at least, trying to.

Today’s gimmie gimmie NOW society doesn’t have much patience when it comes to finding a significant other. Casual hook-ups are becoming more and more acceptable, and internet dating is allowing us to meet tons of people in insanely quick succession. With all the opportunities swarming around us, almost every movie or television show we watch featuring a love story, and bestsellers like He’s Just Not That Into You and 365 Proven Ways to Find Love in Less Than a Year giving any and all advice you could ever desire in the area of dating (though my girl Abigail rightly points out such “advice” isn’t always right…or even close to it), it’s hard to imagine a life that doesn’t include a partner. Read More »