[For many of us, sex and college go together like Uggs and snow - you can’t have one without the other. So, we brought in one of Berkeley’s finest sex columnists, Elizabeth, to start a dialogue about the topic (and act) that is very near and dear to our hearts. Every Thursday she will get your day goin’ with a little somethin’ somethin’ that’s on her mind.]

I am the queen of terrible dates. Good or bad, I’ve always been the girl that “gives him a chance (or two)” often to a fault. After losing some blood, skin, and half of a tooth on my last date (no lie, I can’t make up stuff this good), I decided that enough is enough. No other girl should have to go through the pain of being toothless for two weeks during finals - it’s just wrong.

As a result, I’ve put together a survival guide to navigate you through the three most painful date scenarios you may ever encounter.

1. He wants to pregame with you – before your date.
There is nothing wrong with having a little somethin’ somethin’ before a date, but a trashed date should be a red flag. There are three things that go really well with heavy intoxication: vomit, awkward hook-ups, and injury. Ironically, these are three things clash with dates like Crocs with…anything. So what do you do if your date downs three long islands by the time you order your appetizers? First and foremost, I hope you didn’t wear heels since you will be walking all night thanks to Drunky Danny. If you made the fatal mistake of wearing heels, do not under any circumstances accept any sort of offer from your date to carry you home. Believe me, there is more than one muscle that gets weaker upon intoxication, which may cause him to severely overestimate his strength. Other than that, you can’t really do anything other than put his drunk ass to bed, run home as fast as you can, and never go out with that guy ever again. Read More »

They’re trooping off to the polls in the biting November chill, snug in their Uggs and North Faces zipped to the collars. They’re waking up too early and standing around in long lines for something that isn’t free food. They’re American college students, and they are voting.

Smell that? That’s the smell of freedom. Also, American college students don’t shower much.

Are you with them - or are you against them? Political nihilists beware: the jaded, “The-electoral-college-it’s-a-broken-system-f**k-I’m-moving-to-the-Moon” attitude won’t get you anywhere this year, because cynicism is out and passion is in! If it’s such a big stick up your ass, go vote for Bob Barr or something. If he’s not on the ballot, write-in “John from College Candy.” But please, do go and vote.

And what about this evening? You probably don’t have anything important to do while you watch poll results stream in, and “Nation’s First Black President” or “Nation’s First Woman Vice President” are both perfectly acceptable reasons to skip all your classes tomorrow. This means you should drink! Read More »

[It doesn’t matter what school you go to, what state it is in, how big it is, whether it is public or private, all girls or coed…there are experiences that all college students share. No matter how crazy you think your personal situation is, it is not just you.

So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

The Phone in the Toilet:

You put on your cutest (and tightest) jeans for the partayyy. When you arrive at the house, you drop your jacket in your friend’s room, take a few shots and head out to the living room to mingle. Your best friend is coming late/the boy you want always texts you late-night, so you keep your phone on vibrate in your back pocket so you can feel it when it rings.

You take more shots. And more. And drink a lot of beer. You laugh, you party, you begin to feel really drunk.

And, OMG, you have to pee so badly.

You head upstairs to use the bathroom; it’s gotta be cleaner than the one on the main floor, not to mention the line is probably shorter. Ugh – it’s not. You pull your phone out of your pocket in hopes that your boy-toy has sent you a “where you at?” text message, then shove the phone back into your pocket when the door opens and two people (looking particularly happy) walk out.

You run into the bathroom, lock the door, and stumble as you attempt to pull your jeans down. Just before you get them below your knees you hear a plunk and, HolySh*tNoEffingWayOhMyGodOhMyGod, your phone is in the toilet. Read More »

Well, tonight’s episode of The Hills definitely made up for last week’s lackluster performance. Big things happened! Audrina moved out! Heidi got drunk! And then she got fired!

OMFG it’s like drama overload.

Ok, breathe, Lauren. Let’s start from the beginning.

So, Audrina decides she wants to move out of the house and – poof! – she finds a place. And not just any place; a beautiful, huge, brand new place. What luck?! I mean, I spent 2 months looking for an apartment in NY before I found one…that was in Queens…and I shared with a girl who got drunk and ate in the bathroom and another girl who abused Ambien. Did I mention the lack of A/C? Read More »

[It doesn’t matter what school you go to, what state it is in, how big it is, whether it is public or private, all girls or coed…there are experiences that all college students share. No matter how crazy you think your personal situation is, it is not just you.

So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

Hugging the Bowl:

You started the evening out with the girls and a few shots of vodka to the tune of Bon Jovi blaring from the stereo. Then you moved onto the party, where you couldn’t not play 10 rounds of flip cup, followed by a game of beer pong. You were feeling good – really good – so you decided to give into the boys and do a keg stand.

After all, you had to show them what you’re made of.

When your feet are firmly back on the ground it hits you: you are totally f**ked up. The room is spinning, the floor is rocking and all you can think about is getting home and dying.

But you don’t want anyone to think you are a wimp (because you’re not!), so you pull one of the girls aside and whisper, “I’m tired. I think I’m gonna go,” which comes out more like, “I’m <hiccup> tiiiired. I <hiccup> mthink I’mgomna <vurp> go.” Your friend offers to go with you.

You stumble home, run straight to the bathroom and strip down to your bra and underwear. Your friend brings you water in the bathroom as you crouch over the toilet and start spitting into the bowl. Your knees hurt already, but you are not leaving the bathroom until you puke, dammit. Read More »

Just because you’re a college student doesn’t mean you have to drink like one. I mean, come on; vodka and Crystal Light gets old after awhile. Why not try something a little more…sophisticated? (Editor’s Note: You can still chug it like a college lady.)

These cocktails are guaranteed to make all your friends love you, and, of course, get everyone very, very drunk.

So welcome to the world of sophisticated drunkery.

What better way than to start of the list that with a drink that compliments fall season upon us?

Warm Fall Evening
1 part Absolut Peach
1 part apple flavored vodka
1 part Absolut Mandarin
1 part cinnamon syrup
1 part hot apple juice / cider
Cinnamon

Combine and serve in a glass.

Fall flavors not really your thing? How about a drink that is guaranteed to warm you up in the cold days and put your drinking skills to the test? Can you handle hot sauce? Read More »

[Like a magpie, you gravitate towards things that are shiny: cell phones, TVs, anything that allows you to play Rock Band. But just because you love ‘em doesn’t mean you know much about ‘em. That’s where we come in. Every week we will be highlighting the best, coolest and shiniest in technology. Consider us your personal Geek Squad.

And let us tell ya; with CC on your side, geek has never looked so chic.]

So your current computer/MP3 player/TV/thing that runs on electricity isn’t treating you right anymore. Or perhaps your friends are laughing at you for being trapped in the 90’s (“You still use film for your camera? That is so cute!”). For whatever reason it’s time for you to upgrade. Chances are you know what you’re doing, but just in case you don’t, here are some pointers:

DO: Know what you’re going in there to get. Srsly, don’t go in the store and say,“I’m looking for something to play my music on.” Ok, that’s great, would that be for your home, travel, or other? You can save time (and $$$) by being specific. “I need an mp3 player that’s sturdy with long battery life,” is more appropriate. This allows you take control of your shopping experience rather than be controlled by the sales associate.

DON’T: Go in there thinking that buying gadgets is just like buying a shirt. People make this mistake all the time. If you go into Macy’s and say that you want a red shirt they can show you what they have in stock and you can pretty much make a decision based on your personal knowledge of what does and doesn’t look good on your fabulous self. The same does not hold true for shiny tech stuff because everything looks good, but that doesn’t mean it all works well, epecially if you don’t know what you’re looking at to begin with. Which brings me to my next point. Read More »

[It doesn’t matter what school you go to, what state it is in, how big it is, whether it is public or private, all girls or coed…there are experiences that all college students share. No matter how crazy you think your personal situation is, it is not just you.

So, let’s bring it all out in the open. Right here. Because you are not alone - we’ve all been there before.]

The Drunk Email:

The boy you love just broke your heart, so your girlfriends decide that drinking is in order. Because nothing numbs the pain quite like a few shots of SoCo. Together with your roommates, you pick out a super hot outfit (consisting of some combination of low cut top/push up bra), take a few pre-gaming shots and head out the door to either “show him what he’s missing,” or “forget about that prick.” Read More »