So you have this boyfriend and you are so totally smitten. He is smart, he treats you well and he happens to be 3 inches taller than you…perfect. Things are going really well and you guys are gettin’ pretty serious; he has even met the parentals.

Huge!

And then you catch him at the bar downing a beer with some trampy blonde bimbo. What. the. hell? Is he really flirting right in front of you? Does he want to take this girl home? Is he trying to get into her (ugly/slutty) pants? She has nice boobs, yes, but does he even realize WHAT HE IS THROWING AWAY?

Hold on a second. Maybe you are over-reacting? Is there really something wrong with a little harmless flirting in a relationship? He is comin’ home with you, after all. Maybe it’s totally innocent. Maybe he’s telling that whore about his amazing girlfriend! And if not, he’s still comin’ home with you, right?

We asked our boy advisor to weigh in on this touchy (did you catch that pun? HA!) subject. Here is what he had to say. Read More »

I have had, on multiple occasions, the uncomfortable conversation that always ends with the words “I don’t think of you in that way.” I have sat down with many a guy friend to clarify that we’re just friends. I have explained to guys numerous times that I like to keep my friendships and my relationships separate, and that I don’t date my friends. I always mean it when I say it. I always want to stick to it. But the line between friendships and relationships always seems to blur in my confused little world. Why is “I don’t think of you in that way” so hard for me to say?

There have been several occasions this year where I have had to have this conversation. What troubles me the most is that I can’t seem to avoid it. I’m a huge flirt, especially when I’ve had too many whiskey sours, so I can understand why some guys might get the wrong idea and think I’m interested in more than just a shoulder to rest my head on when the room starts to get spinny. But even with guys I don’t get super flirty with, I still have to have the conversation. It’s always approached one of two ways:

The first is a situation in which I have heavily flirted with, or mildly hooked-up with, a guy friend and I have to explain to him that this doesn’t mean we’re meant to settle down, get married, and procreate. The second situation, and the more annoying one because it’s unavoidable is the, “How come we never hooked up?” conversation. Read More »

Seriously, who gives out their number anymore?

I remember having a drunken bonding moment with a really cool guy in college a few years ago, and he asked for my number. I asked for his screen name instead. I mean, IM-ing someone is so much more casual, and so much less stressful. You don’t have to feel your heart thumping through your chest as the phone rings. Is he going to answer? Is it going to go to voicemail? Is he blocking me? What do I say if he picks up?

With IM, you can see if he’s away or idle, and choose your own adventure from there. You can leave a casual “Just wanted to say I had a great time last night” IM, rather than starting a phone call with the same line and then struggling to make small talk. Likewise, you can make small talk behind the shield of the IM window, where he can’t hear your voice crack, and where you can copy and paste the whole convo to all of your girlfriends and get advice while you try to weed out his intentions.

And then came Facebook. The social network has made quite the mark on the dating scene. There’s the poke, which can be viewed as casual, flirty, or creepy. There’s the “it’s complicated” label for the relationship you’re in (finally- you can be open about having a f*ck buddy without warding off the rest of the male population!); and of course, there’s the wall post, which makes the casual IM seem like the awkward phone call of yesteryear. Read More »

Here at CC, our opinions on love, sex and relationships cover pretty much the whole spectrum of ideals (and according to the fantastic discussions amongst commentors, so do yours, lovely readers). However I think we can all agree that long distance relationships are difficult.

Whether you are a serial LDD-er (long distance dater, obvs) or this is your first case of separation anxiety, remember that a summer break is not a relationship death sentence, but more of a Paris-esque mini lockdown with time off for good behavior!

The most important aspect of a long distance relationship (as in any other healthy one) is communication. Beyond the obvious (calling, texting, IMing), it’s important to create an open channel of expression that allows you both to clearly explain your thoughts, feelings and, most importantly, expectations throughout this relationship vacation (not the Speidi version).

Before you two lovebirds separate, talk about the impending geographical issue. Discuss how you’re feeling about it (nervous? anxious? scared?) and why. Bring up your thoughts on the social scene and parties. I’m not a believer in strict rules governing your right to party (thank you, Beastie Boys) but your definition of a good time might be quite different from his (Is it ok to flirt shamelessly but innocently for free drinks? Are you cool with a night at the strip club with his boys?). By talking about problems like wandering eyes or drifting apart before they happen, you can easily avoid them. And by establishing a sitch where you can freely talk about stuff like that will help you stay secure in your union. Read More »

In this episode, the Lohans FINALLY get to Vegas! They didn’t fly there in a private jet though, which I’m gonna admit was a bit of a let down (I expected some major control issues and perhaps Dina’s debut as a pilot), and there was no liquor fueled dramz. While the episode was age appropriately absent of hard booze, it was heavy on the whine.

For some reason, Ali chooses to adopt an even more nasally tone for this 25 minute tribute to ungratefulness. She complains in this obnoxious tantrum pending voice about all of the trials life has delivered to her. Like the fact that she, her awesome brother and (arguably) cool mom have to live in a tricked out penthouse at the Palms while she records her album. I guess it gets pretty taxing when you’re attending all of these exhausting “Welcome to Vegas!” parties (with delicious looking cake) thrown just for you by the f*#king Maloufs.

Ugh, sorry about that. Anyways, Dina introduces Ali (who is wearing a gorgeous but way too mature minidress) to a bunch of important 30 something guys that she wants Ali to “get comfortable with.” Dina baby, they’re mentally undressing your 14 year old — not very comfort inducing, I would say. The men all flirt with Ali while she fidgets, present her the aforementioned cake (note to self, go buy something with chocolate as soon as I’m done writing) and begin an episode long tradition of complimenting Ali and promising her she’s the next big thing. Read More »

Guys are aggressive, goal-oriented and more confident than their female counterparts.

Sure, that was an extreme generalization and stereotype-enhancing statement, but there’s certainly some truth to it. As females, we’ve been spoon-fed the ideals that women need to be ladies, think about others first, be passive as to not offend anyone and be a ‘nice’ girl. And while I am all for embracing my femininity, being a fierce female and loving my feminist leanings, I can’t help but notice the ways in which guys manage to get ahead and lead a more stress-free life by simply ‘acting like guys’.

Since it’s more socially acceptable and even expected for men to behave in certain ways, they tend to have a leg up on females and the way we operate. In some situations, harnessing male aggression and assertiveness can pay big dividends.

Work it
Modesty and humility seem to be essential characteristics of a well-mannered woman, or so we are told. But when interviewing for a job, asking for a promotion or writing your resume, confidence and bravado are crucial. If you’re deserving of a promotion or qualified for a job, you need to be upfront and toot your own horn. Take every opportunity to boast about your recent accomplishments, achievements and successes with practical examples. Read More »

I’m in a fight with Facebook. First they opened the doors to every crazy person on the planet/your mom. Then they started telling you everything your “friends” were doing. Then they started recommending friends to you, even though you would already have those people as friends if you wanted to.

And now those crazy boys at Facebook are stirring the pot again. This time with Facebook chat. Read More »

Have you ever met that guy who’s got arrogance dripping from his pores? He’s a Tommy Lee, with charm, stuck in a Brad Pitt body. And he can dance. And he is undeniably witty…always with better comebacks than your own during your flirtatious banter with him.

He can get all the girls. And the fact that he knows it sadly doesn’t make it any less of a fact because…you know you’d do him, too.

Well, Scotland’s Calvin Harris is not only this guy…but he’s written a song about it, too. As I heard his music for the first time in a video on YouTube, aptly named, “The Girls“; I was angry. The chorus of his song is simple:

“I get all the girls, I get all the girls, I get all the girls, I get all the girls”.

He dances around with American Apparel looking babes of all sorts of hair and skin color. And I’m angry because I would bet money that he DID get all of those girls after the video shoot.

And the sexiest part of all? Read More »

In a dark, moderately dirtball Irish pub with adorable bartenders straight from Ireland, I am approached by a liquor promoter. He’s pretty good-looking, obviously a flirt because who else takes a job as a promoter, and so begins his attempt as he hands me a keychain:”Who do you get? Who do people always say you look like?”

I reply the truth, no one, because no one even thinks I look like myself after changing the hair. But the promoter has an opinion,

“Okay, so, you definitely don’t have some features she has, which is a good thing, but—”

Is he serious? I am intrigued by the obvious trap he is setting for himself. Why is it that dumb must always accompany pretty?

“—did you watch Blossom? I swear, you’re a post nose-job Blossom…. No, it’s a good thing!”

Was it really? I spent the rest of the evening staring at my nose in the mirror behind the bar and glaring at the promoter, who at the end of the evening thought he had a shot at seeing me at his ‘gig’ next weekend. Read More »

After our recent post about choosing to live in the same dorm as your significant other, I thought I’d bring up a similar topic I’m struggling with: should you start a relationship with a roommate?

My current financial situation means I had to make a few compromises when looking for a new apartment. First off, I had to move to a shady neighborhood. And not just a put-away-your-ipod kind of neighborhood, but a maybe-you-should-carry-pepper-spray-and-also-possibly-a-knife kind of place. Secondly, I moved in with three boys.

Yes, I know, I’m living in a glorified frat house: Scarface posters on the wall, 2 years worth of grime in the tub (so much for a relaxing post-work soak) and a fridge full of beer and moldy food. When I arrived to take a look around and put down my deposit, however, I soon realized that these were the least of my problems; one of my roommates is cute. Read More »