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Grossest Halloween candy ever!!

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Creepy cocktails for Halloween! Yum!!!

While Halloween now is more closely associated with finding a (slutty) costume and drinking Halloween inspired beverages, as a kid, there was nothing better than going door to door loading up on enough candy to last you till the 4th of July.Only problem is, my mom - the smart woman that she is - knew her life would be torturous through July if she let her three hyper children keep that much sugar around.

So every year, my two older brothers and I would have to dump all of our coveted, prized candy into the middle of the table. My mother then carefully separated the candy into piles - Milky Ways in one pile, Twix in another, Candy Corn in another, and so on. She then handed a bucket to each of us and, one by one, we would go around taking our pick and filling our buckets.

Once they were filled, the rest of the candy went to inner-city kids whose neighborhoods were too dangerous to trick-or-treat in (which now I see was a very noble thing but at the time I couldn’t understand why they deserved my candy gold. After all, I spent three long hours in the cold with clown makeup on my face, saying stupid poems at people’s doors while they filled my bag up with all that deliciousness). Read More »

Halloween can be a great holiday; candy, being able to wear those 4-inch glitter pumps you bought for some occasion that could only be Halloween, weird-colored drinks that taste like an explosion of sugar…we could go on. Halloween is just badass.

But you know what? Halloween can also be really, really inappropriate. Inappropriate body parts shoved into spandex, inappropriate masks that scare the bejeezus out of people on the street, inappropriate dances to inappropriate song selections such as “Monster Mash” — if you’re not careful, this holiday can quickly go from good time to complete epic FAIL.

Here’s a few ways that can happen… Read More »