Seriously, how awkward is the break-up convo? In the words of 90s one-hit-wonder Nada Surf, “even if you’ve gone together for only a short time, and haven’t been too serious, there’s still a feeling of rejection when someone says she prefers the company of others to your exclusive company.”

Sometimes, I think finding out that your mate has cheated is a blessing in disguise, because you can sidestep the entire “this isn’t working” discussion and end things in an explosive fight instead. Of course, for those of us who just had to choose nice, faithful boys, it can be hard to let the poor guy down. So, we make up excuses. Sometimes we even lie. Read More »

Put this under Things You Should Not Do If You Want To Remain A Happy Person: finding out what your ex is up to now.

To preface, I’m not talking about the person you dated for a month who you kind of cared about but never enough to commit and / or introduce him to your friends. If you want to look through that guy’s Facebook or Myspace, go ahead. Seeing him with his arms wrapped around another girl will probably do nothing but make you kind of glad you’re no longer seeing someone who thinks weird neck tattoos of skulls are cool.

But look, if you loved the dude (or chick), and it kind of ripped your heart out when things ended, do yourself a favor let them remain a mystery. Don’t try to find them on Facebook if you’re not already connected, unfriend them if you are, don’t ask mutual friends about who they’re dating, and for the love of god, DON’T GOOGLE THEM.

I am a naturally nosey person, but after The Big Ex and I split up years ago, I refused to seek out information on the girl he started dating a mere few weeks after our 4 year stint ended. I knew my friends had info, I could tell by their eyes whenever they tried to jump away from the subject, but I never pressed them. And when information was accidentally spilled to me, I made a conscious effort to change the subject and told people “I really don’t care to know”. It was hard, because I did care to know, but I knew that need for knowledge was coming from a macabre place in my brain that loved to torture the rest of me. Read More »

[Read the first part of this blog HERE]

I wasn’t planning to go to the prom. With no date and a recent heartbreak, what was the point? Instead, I was going to dress up and have dinner with some single friends. Except… at dinner, one of my friends and I decided that we kind of wanted to go to the prom after all.

The only problem was that it seemed impossible—you needed to have a ticket to get in, and tickets had been selling all week for $50/pair. Advance tickets were the only tickets, and you couldn’t buy them at the door.

My friend and I complained to each other about how $50/pair was an exorbitant price for prom tickets (something I still believe). “Screw that,” she said. “Let’s just sneak in.” Read More »

This is a sad story. It begins, as most of my stories do, with me spilling coffee all over myself. I ducked into the nearest clothing store to pick up a cheap new shirt, and found myself staring at a lime-green, rhinestone-encrusted t-shirt reading “My Boyfriend Is Cuter Than Yours.” Next to it, a similar horror, this one reading “I May Be A Flirt, But My Boyfriend Likes It.” Above it, “I’m A Diva! Just Ask My Boyfriend!” Literally every single shirt on that wall featured the word “Boyfriend.” It was a perfect storm of condescending t-shirt copy. But it opened my eyes a bit.

For girls, having a relationship is not just a fun bonus - it’s practically a requirement. We’re told from birth that it is our job to make people desire us. Being single, in this light, is a violation of the Lord’s almighty commandment to girls: Thou Shalt Committedly Bone. When you break up, there are precious few resources to support your decision.

The fact is, you don’t have to be in a relationship just to be there. And, when a relationship passes, you don’t have to stop having fun. It’s just that being miserable is really easy. I have been guilty, many a time, of taking this stuff too seriously. Having salvaged just enough from these wrecks to learn something, I hereby pass down to you the cardinal sins of the heartbroken. It may not be much - but avoiding these things will, at least, allow you to emerge into your fun new single life without sacrificing your dignity.

1. SEEING HIS/HER FRIENDS Read More »

Valentine’s Day. Blah, blah, blah. I really have nothing to say about this holiday other than I’m sure certain people love it. Being stricken with the flu for three days does nothing to brighten a girl’s demeanor, and V-Day has never been high on my list of days to get excited about.

I don’t own a card store. I’ve never dated anyone who’d be pulling diamonds out of his pocket, and it’s always been strange to me that we need certain days to prove we love one another.

Sorry about being a screwup for 364 days, honey. Here’s some chocolates and a bear. Let’s make up.

ANYway, all annoyance aside, I’m aware that there are other opinions about February 14th. Some people love this day. Seriously. Can’t get enough. And other people…?

Well, they use it as an excuse to lie on their bed, stare at the ceiling, eat a box of chocolates all themselves, and go all melancholy about why they have no one.

If you’re one of these, have I got the mix for you.

Below is a list of songs guaranteed to help those tears, and dear god whys?!, flow. Read More »

Okay, okay, I may be a bit biased on this topic, due to my heartbreak three years ago at the end of my freshman year of college. But every year around this time, I get a little nostalgic about this issue.

All of my first year, I dated a boy from high school who went to college 14 hours away from me, and we somehow managed to make it through the whole year with visits, emails, and a hefty phone bill. I could not wait to get home for the summer and live in the same town again. But, upon returning, it was evident that things were different between us and he broke up with me. I was devastated and could not understand why this had happened. What did I do wrong?

The thing that I wish someone had told me originally is that, in college, people CHANGE, in some way or another, no matter what. And that’s not always a bad thing! I know I have grown into who I am over these four years and feel confident in what I want to do with my life and how I will get there.

Read More »

We all know that breakups totally suck, no matter how you cut it. Whether you are the one doing the dumping or the one who gets their heart ripped out and stomped on, no one comes out of a breakup unscathed.

Something that may help lift your spirits? Throw a party! I know it sounds cheesy at first. But after watching a clip on The Today Show about a gorgeous girl who moved across the country for a dude only to find out it wasn’t going to work, and then had the time of her life at a breakup party thrown by her friends, I think it can be done. Yes, some people take these parties too far, aka Shanna Moakler who threw a “Divorce Party.”

Seriously though, what’s the harm in celebrating one more girl joining the single and looking to mingle club (when there are no kids or family involved)? Everything is better with a few cocktails. And what girl doesn’t love a chance to get together with girlfriends and have some real fun?

Well, luckily, now, there is an actual market for break up party supplies. How perfect!

Read More »