I am never alone in college. Sure, I have the elevator to myself occasionally and sometimes my roommate is at class when I’m not, but usually there is always someone else nearby. This is drastically different from my high school experience.

Of course I would spend every high school moment from that morning bell—which seemed to ring earlier and earlier as my senior year wore on—to the final bell with my friends by my side. I was part of a bunch of different groups, all of which met after or before school and surrounded me with people. But at home, I had solitude.

With both my parents working and my brother off at college, I spent many nights doing homework, watching bad television and heating up leftovers all by myself. Some may think that would be lonely, but I really liked the peace and quiet.

It’s never quiet here. And sometimes I like it; with all the commotion, I haven’t had time to get homesick or have a culture shock freak out. There’s a feeling of community when I walk around campus and see someone I know or when I strike up a conversation with a stranger in the dining hall. Yet every once in awhile I realize… I never have a moment to myself. Read More »

I hate Halloween. I have always hated Halloween. One of the first pictures anyone ever took of me is in a pumpkin costume at age 4, crying my eyes out. I don’t hate other people who like Halloween, but the holiday itself makes me so pissed that when prompted to write a Halloween article I refused to write a positive one.

So if you want to hear about why Halloween rocks you should go somewhere else because I f*cking hate it and I’m about to make you hate it too by listing some reasons why it’s terrible and should be canceled.

Costumes: Yah, I said it. F*ck costumes. I have never trusted motherf*ckers in costumes. Why are you wearing that? People in costumes can do anything they want, and often do on Halloween, because it’s basically the official Holiday for burglary and assault.  That’s really what I want, a day where it’s impossible to spot criminals because everyone is wearing a godd*mn mask.

I don’t even like people at Disneyland and sh*t wearing costumes. Ask any nerd which day was the worst in high school and I guarantee you that Halloween is up near the top of the list. “I sure wish I knew who was beating the sh*t of out me right now, beyond ‘guy in gas mask’ and ‘guy in hockey mask!’”

Additionally, wearing costumes is probably the most uncomfortable thing ever. It’s hot and you can’t hear sh*t and you can’t run away from other people in costume without making a ridiculous shuffling noise. F*ck costumes. Unless you’re on a stage or in a movie, no costumes ever. Street performers shouldn’t be allowed to wear costumes. No one. EVER. Read More »

I did not go to a rough and tough urban school where knife fights happened daily and teachers getting punched were regular occurrences.  I did not go to a high school where metal detectors were needed, where kids sold drugs in every corner, or even where hall passes mattered.  My high school was in rural New England — and still, if Adnan Ghalib had tried to walk through the front door looking, talking, and acting like he is today, his ass would get such a beat down there’d be nothing left but that sick little landing strip on his chin.

First of all, even though my public high school was brimming with middle to upper class white kids, even middle to upper class white kids know that certain fashion decisions are worthy of an ass kicking; tight shirts with silk-screened skulls paired with multiple cross necklaces, random newsboy caps, giant sunglasses worn inside, and LANDING STRIPS ON ONE’S FACE are just a few of the things that Adnan wears with wild abandon that would surely mean his demise at my high school.

Secondly, carrying around an obvious pompous assh*le jerk vibe has been known to get certain idividuals thown into dumpters.  Very rarely, an obvious assh*ole jerk would climb the ranks and become a popular assh*ole jerk, but most of the time, Upperclassmen didn’t take too kindly to douchebags who walked around like they owned the place. I knew a kid Sophomore year who tried to hit on a Senior’s girlfriend (even though it was front page school news the senior was dating this chick) and that kid ended up taped to the flagpole — overnight. Read More »

I have a confession. When Joey Potter chose Pacey Witter over Dawson Leary, I was pissed. I mean, the show was “Dawson’s Creek,” not “Pacey’s Creek.”

That said, Gossip Girl seems to be taking a similar turn this season, as the supporting characters are totally stealing the spotlight. How ironic, considering that last night’s episode was all about Blair’s insecurity and the dark shadow that Serena casts on her. Let’s just get right down to business and discuss.

This week’s GG lesson? Your whole life is fulfilled when your photo appears in US Weekly, apparently. And if you aren’t photographed by the paparazzi at the age of sixteen, apparently all of your conniving plans to take charge of your mom’s fashion show and upstage your (former) bff will blow up in your face and bring great success to everyone else. Read More »

Remember when we were in high school and our teachers and parents told us that we’d better get ready for the ‘real world’? Maybe you didn’t hear these words of advice (which always seemed more like a threat) as much as I did, but I know I wasn’t the only one out there being warned of how hard my twenties would be. Across the board, particularly from older friends, I kept hearing horror story after horror story about the ‘terrible 20’s’.

But you know what?  I disagree with those stories.

I think life is what you make it. I think that if you want to be happy, you will find a way to be happy. I think that if you’re meant to be in college, you will study hard and learn and enjoy it along the way.

I’m 24 and my twenties have been my favorite part of my life so far. Granted, I’m constantly trying to have the best time of my life, so I’ll probably be bouncing off the same sentiments when I’m 40, too…but what’s wrong with that? Read More »

If there’s one thing I learned from Gossip Girl last night, it’s that you can have sex with whomever you want, and the person you actually have feelings for (but aren’t banging, for some reason) will completely understand, and forgive you, and maybe even like you more.

If there’s one thing I already knew, it’s that when you’re the poor, unpopular kid on the Upper East Side, your life will be a continuous cycle of being walked over, speaking your mind, putting your foot in your mouth, and then being magically forgiven and allowed to advance to the next round.

Did you miss last night’s episode? Let me fill you in.

Within the first minute of GG, Nate mentions the inevitable party that will tangle everyone up in some drama that will continue to be played out next week.

Other expected GG staples: Catherine and Nate talk money; Serena and Dan are together but have issues (did I miss them deciding to be a “secret” couple?); and Jenny has some great ideas for her fashion internship, but she’s a lowly intern and isn’t allowed to have opinions.

The best thing about the first half? The mini gossip girls who approach Dan and throw in their two cents. If you missed it, two tweeny-bopping brunettes are on Dan’s side, and one tweeny-bopping blond is on team S. The blond asks Serena how she can kiss Dan, knowing his tongue has been in Georgina’s mouth, which seems a bit much when you consider the girs were, what, 11? The tweensters were obviously comic relief, but for some reason their opinions caused an awkward rift between S and Lonely Boy…which I was over by the next commercial. Read More »

Even though a lot of us look back on high school fondly, most of us are smart enough to know that nostalgia is based more on Hollywood movies and selective memory than actual fact. Hell, by the time we were done with 12th grade, we were so happy to be out of there that we hardly looked back after that big “Happy Graduation!” pool party where we hid behind our towel just in case our 4-year crush finally noticed us and asked us out.

33-year-old Wendy Brown, however, really believed that high school was the place to be. Arrested last weekend on felony identity theft charges, Brown may face a year in jail for trying to impersonate her 15-year-old daughter and joining the cheerleading squad at a high school in Green Bay, Wisconsin.

After having a child at 17, Brown believed she had “missed” a vital part of her childhood and thought enrolling as a fake teenager and going to a pool party at a cheerleading coach’s house was a surefire way to fix all her problems. Weirdly, even though school officials thought Brown “looked older than a student,” they thought her demeanor was “teenager” enough to accept her as a real student — that is until the middle-aged woman stopped going to school and only showed up for cheerleading practice.

So really, Brown didn’t want to go back and do the work of high school, she just wanted to have the “fun” — jumping around in a little skirt during basketball games played by kids half her age. Read More »

So, we’re two seconds into the highly-anticipated season premiere of Gossip Girl, and already the hormones are flying! Cue gratuitous shot of Chace Crawford, panting and frisking some girl in the front seat of a car.

Mmmmm.

But this is GG, people. Chace Crawford sexcapades can hardly satisfy our thirst for smut clothed in Prada. Cut to Chuck, chardonnay in hand, on a beach with one…two…three insanely hot girls. Oh, Chuck Bass. You are what every sixteen-year-old boy should aspire to be before graduating high school.

First shocker of the episode: GG informs us that “Lonely Boy” Dan isn’t so lonely after all. It seems he has a new chick — wait, maybe two new girls? Can you spell R-E-B-O-U-N-D?

Of course, before our first commercial break, we need a love triangle, and some legit dramz. Send Chuck to meet Blair, looking sweet and dapper with roses in hand. Insert random new man (James), let Blair make steamy eye contact with Chuck and then shove her tongue down new guy’s throat. This is how it goes down for high schoolers in the Hamptons.

It’s game, set, match for Blair when she enjoys dinner with both James and Chuck, yet she still feels the need to run after Chuck when he storms away from the table with his tail between his legs. WTF Blair? We know you don’t feel the same way for James as you did for Nate. Otherwise you wouldn’t be chasing Chuck. Alas, poor Chuck, who used to be made of steel, turns on the waterworks again, just in time for another gratuitous Chace Crawford shot — hottie Nate running down the street in his underwear after his new lover’s husband comes home early from work. Read More »