Gone are the days of dainty purses and miniscule wallets. They’re fine for special events, sure, but for everyday use, it looks like women are turning to real bags. Huge bags. The kind of bag into which you fit half your life- and then never find it again. Giant black holes slung on our shoulders sucking in every stray business card, matchbook, and penny that cross their paths.

At one time Big Bags were strictly for use by mommies, to carry Bandaids and nail clippers and tissues and lip balm and the million-and-one other things that kids may require on a daily basis.

Now my own Big Bag is stocked with Bandaids and nail clippers and tissues and lip balm, and I definitely have zero children in tow. The bottom is littered with old receipts, seven pens and gum wrappers. My Metrocards are slipping between the pages of my three notepads and my laptop is a constant companion. There’s even a hardcover copy of The Corrections by Jonathan Franzen somewhere in there. My iPod headphones are tangled up in my cell phone charger. Every credit card I’ve ever owned is jammed into my wallet that contains no cash. Three lipsticks are rolling around stuck inside of the lining.

Sound familiar? Read More »

If my life was a movie, I’d look jaw-dropping-hot in a little black dress, and every college hook-up would involve a Freddie Prinze, Jr. lookalike leaning in for a kiss, while Six Pence None the Richer’s “Kiss Me” plays in the background. But, since my life is not She’s All That, my spit-swapping stories involve a lot of liquor, and a lot of regrets. There’s a Now! That’s What I Call Music CD out there with Aaron Carter’s “Aaron’s Party (Come Get It)” on the track listing. I know this because it made up the soundtrack of a one night stand a few years ago. Yeah, that’s how my sex life goes down.

Life doesn’t come equipped with an orchestra. If your sexcapades, like your iTunes, are on shuffle, here are a few songs you probably don’t want on your playlist.

1. “Dat Baby”–Shawty Putt feat. Lil Jon

With a chorus of “Dat baby don’t look like me,” and an opening line, “Dat baby ain’t mine… I’m sorry, bitch you heard Maury,” this jam is an instant libido-killer. The last thing a guy wants to hear as he’s sliding into home base is “You are NOT the father!” Sure, you’re using protection, but condoms aren’t 100% effective…paternity tests, on the other hand, don’t lie. Besides, no woman wants to find out that her cute college hookup won’t take responsibility if an accident does happen. Read More »

With the economy in a serious downturn (thanks to the Wall Street Hangover, apparently), smart college women like ourselves know better than to hit the malls and stock up on the latest fashion. We have to save! We have to buy gas! We have to invest in our futures!

But, there are just some things out there that are worth a little splurge. Sure, you may not be able to buy corn products next week, but who cares? You have yourself one of these babies:

1. An iPod.
I’m sure half of you already have iPods, but I’m also sure there are a few of you out there who are like me… unwilling to fork over the dough because you’re cheap and/or poor. Well, let me tell you, investing in an iPod is the way to go. After forking over the dough for something REALLY huge (a new computer), I got a free iPod touch, and wow. Just wow. The future is here. I can’t even fathom getting to access the Internet for free on a device that also plays music and lets me take notes, get the weather, and watch movies… it’s so awesome.

2. A new computer.
After eight years (serious) of lugging around an outdated Mac laptop, I took a deep breath and hit the “purchase” button last week for a new MacBook Pro. My old computer was still working… it was like a tortoise in terms of speed, though, and it wasn’t really capable of streaming video. Oh, yeah, and the total hard drive capacity was 9 GB. My new computer, I am already convinced, is the best investment I’ve ever made. I can Skype! I can load Web pages in under the amount of time it takes me to make a sandwich! I can listen to podcasts! With my old Mac, podcasts were something strange and exotic that I had heard about but never experienced. If you too are toiling away on an ancient computer, GET A NEW ONE! It is sooooo worth it! Read More »

On the new iPhone you can call your friends, listen to the new Beck album, send emails, Google ex-boyfriends, and even navigate your way to the closest coffee shop for a caffeine fix. The days of finding a payphone and then realizing that you’re out of quarters are long, looooong gone. Even announcements about turning off cell phones and pagers make us snicker.

I’d like to take this opportunity (5:30pm on a Tuesday sitting in a Starbucks…) to thank the techie gods for these five technological innovations I can’t imagine my life without:

1) The Laptop – I wouldn’t even be here, sitting in this Starbucks at 5:30pm on a Tuesday if it weren’t for the laptop. Mine is a black MacBook. It’s light, sleek, fast, and now that I’ve got a new battery, it holds a five-hour charge. As a writer I can’t even imagine what it must have been like to have to write papers, even novels, on typewriters. Writing a page and then realizing that there was a spelling error? The horror! Being stuck in a home office or computer lab in order to use a desktop computer? Never again! Read More »

Remember back when your parents met? How did your parents meet, anyway? Mine worked at the same ad agency and had a number of mutual friends. They courted the good old-fashioned way, with phone calls and dinner dates.

Wait a second, though—isn’t that still the way people do it?

What with your iPod in your left hand, your BlackBerry in your right hand, your laptop spread out in front of you, and your cell phone plastered to your ear, it seems a little weird to imagine dating without the technology of today.

But when you think about it, the dating of today is really just the same as the dating of pre-technology. Maybe it’s just because I never have the latest gadgets and I try to avoid logging into my Facebook account whenever possible, but I really don’t think it’s necessary to electronically “poke” my love interest or text “OMG U=SO GR8 LAST NITE!” to my boyfriend’s cell phone. Call me old-fashioned, but I actually find it annoying when my relationship becomes entangled with technology.

There have to be other people out there who feel that way. I mean, yeah, it can be nice to stalk your crush in a nonthreatening way by reading up on the interests they list in an online profile—but wouldn’t it be better to, say, ask that person out for coffee and chat about hobbies over a caramel latté, face to face? Or is that just too much to ask? Read More »

VH1’s “I Love the New Millennium” premiered this week. Much like its fabulously entertaining predecessors mocking the 80’s and 90’s (sorry, the 70’s one predates me), it doesn’t fail to deliver laughs and amusing sound bites. Although I think I Love the New Millennium might be jumping the gun time-wise (they are discussing things that happened, like, last week!), I adore the short-attention-span-theater for the distraction-inclined:

Exploring all the pop cultural guilty pleasures, memorable products and people, disgraces and debuts, fads and fashions, scandals and sensations.

With clever and over-animated comedians dissecting and reflecting on everything from metrosexuals to Dance Dance Revolution to Sudoku, you can’t help but giggle at the off the wall and politically incorrect observations. In honor of the show, I decided to take a yummy walk down pop-culture memory lane from 2000-2004. Here are some of my personal favorite memories from the new millennium…and the ones I despise.

New Millennium Favs:

Napster- The inspiring illegal innovation that started it all. Thank you, Shawn Fanning, for changing the musical and digital landscape.

Uggs- I don’t care how hideous they are and how far-gone the trend is, these babies keep my tootsies toasty on the way to class or, if I’m feeling really lazy, at the bar. Read More »

Most people’s first encounter with the ultra hip, uber talented band, The Ting Tings can be attributed to Steve Jobs and his brilliant iPod commercials. Their song, Shut Up and Let Me Go, was catchy, fun and piqued everyone’s interest…in more than an MP3 player. Fortunately, that song wasn’t the only trick up The Ting Tings’ sleeve.Their newest album, We Started Nothing, is further proof of this duo’s serious talent. Unable to get those songs out of our heads, CollegeCandy just had to get the story behind the band. So, we did. The good news: Katie White is just as down to earth and cool as she is talented. And, though we didn’t get to chat with Jules, we are pretty sure the same goes for him.

CC: We Started Nothing is chock full of textured beats, irresistible melodies and witty lyrics- where do the songs come from?
TT: We didn’t intend to form in a band so I think it came from a very honest place, because when we wrote these songs we didn’t think anyone would ever hear them. We just wrote them to play for our friends at parties. We were both feeling quite frustrated at the time and very sort of, I don’t know, like, invisible. We had been in a band that hadn’t worked out, we had a bit of a horrible time with it; I think it came from a real frustrated point of view, but they weren’t negative songs; they were just songs to make us feel better.

CC: Could you describe your song writing process?
TT: It’s completely different for every song. Both myself and Jules write everything together. Sometimes it will be that I will come up with something on the guitar and then we’ll come up with an idea on top of that. Or Jules might come up with something on the guitar or drums, or we’ll play keyboards or we’ll just have this little percussive sound. We just turn to sing like guy vocals and then an idea will come out of it.

CC: A year and a half ago, you were playing living room parties for friends; what’s the largest venue you have played to date and how does the experience differ from the early sets?
TT: The largest venue we’ve played to date so far is the festival for the BBC one big weekend in the UK. I don’t know how many people there were, but there were thousands and thousands all singing our song. It’s very different. We just try to keep it the same really, we haven’t tried to change the bond, we haven’t tried to make it anything that it wasn’t; we just keep being ourselves and you know, people either like it or they don’t. We don’t try to manipulate it for other audiences or anything. Read More »

This morning, as I do every weekday morning, I hopped on the bus and made my way downtown for work. It’s a crappy way to get around but it saves time avoiding traffic and keeps me from paying tons in parking. Whatever. Anyway, I usually have a few things to do to keep me entertained on the ride, however on this unfortunate day, my ipod died the second I walked out of my apartment, and I finished my book at the bus stop waiting for my bus. Damn.

So, after a few minutes of staring off into space and a few minutes of rummaging through my purse I notice the woman sitting in front of me was in the midst of a serious texting-fest. So, I peaked over her shoulder and took up reading.

HORRIBLE IDEA! The conversation went a little something like this (and keep in mind I actually cleaned this up a little.)

Lady in front of me: Sorry about last night
Reply: Don’t worry, I like when you pull my hair…
(Me: what the hell?) Read More »

When I was in 6^th grade I made a mixed tape for my boyfriend. Side A was filled with songs I loved (and taped off of the radio); side B was songs about love (which included a lot of Mariah Carrey and a few jams from California Dreams). I decorated the tiny white label with pink hearts and our names. I adorned the outside of the tape case with glitter, stickers and a picture of the two of us at the most recent Bar Mitzvah. It was so romantic.

Soon, mixed tapes turned into CD mixes. People were tossing out their tape players and trading up to the Disc-Man and 6-CD changers. For me, CD Mixes were far superior to their antiquated predecessors. The CD’s shape and size provided much more space for decorations/proclamations of love. I was making mixes for everyone (friends, lovers) and everything (workouts, power hours); but I didn’t realize that my days of CD mixing were also coming to an end.

With the advent of the MP3 player (namely, the iPod) came an end to an era. People were getting rid of their standard music players of choice in favor of the smaller, sleeker MP3 players. Sure, I bought one (I am actually on number 3), but with this shift into the future I was yearning for the old days. I missed my mixed tapes!

I started scouring the internet for a tape player. I wanted to bring back the glory! Then I realized that just because I bought a tape recorder to make the tapes didn’t mean that the recipients would have tape players to play em. And then I found this. Read More »

I’ve had my share of eccentric travel companions, but none can top my alcoholic ex-boyfriend. On our trip to Italy, his antics epitomized the disgusting reasons why we are called Ugly Americans. The list below clearly catalogs ten reasons I now choose my travel companions wisely.

Our trip to Italy began as most do: pleasantly, in romantic Rome. We had been dating for nearly a year and, for two months leading up to the trip, he quit drinking and limited his smoking! I was feeling optimistic. We spent the day walking to all the major sites in Rome except for the Sistine Chapel, which we agreed would be a nice culmination of our travels and saved for the end of our trip.

Reason #1: A Peroni in Florence
Walking along the main promenade our first evening in fiery “Firenze,” he was hungry and stopped by a pizza joint, ordering pizza and a Peroni. “I can’t travel in Italy and not drink at least one Peroni,” he insisted. He was hungover the next morning, and we were an hour late to our reserved date at the Uffizi.

Reason #2: A Moretti in Venice
We arrived in the maze that is Venice by train. Claiming he was hot and in need of a refreshment, he ordered a Moretti at a nearby café. Then, upon arriving at our hotel, he continued to drink at the nearby bar while I showered. Four beers later and much to my embarrassment, he jumped off a bridge into the contaminated channel. A passing resident scolded him and a fight nearly ensued. For the remainder of our stay, he was on a quest to find the highest bridge from which to jump. Due to a “mysterious” ear infection, he ultimately decided against it. Read More »