No one believes Britney actually earned her moon men.

Oh God. Lindsay Lohan wants to be a mom.

Scary baby preacher.

The NYT takes on your filthy habit.

The tales of self-love always have a happy ending.

The VMAs in 2 minutes (which would have been long enough!).

Joe Francis shot down by Donald Trump.

Triumph the Comic Dog visits the RNC….for me to poop on.

The Gap is back and turning heads at Fashion Week.

Don’t let that smile fool ya; Ann Curry is a biatch.

What you’ve been missing from Fashion Week in NYC.

Sorority Forever: A new web series that may be worth checking out.

I’m sorry, did I miss something? Are these men actually attractive?

In most cases I would say the only reason that women date rich, ugly celebs is for their money, however, the women who date them have money.

When you’re a rich man from “The Lucky Sperm Club”; born into wealth, fed caviar from platinum baby spoons and vacation in The Hamptons only to return to your opulent, unnecessarily extravagant, fully-staffed mansion, you’re also a man who is getting laid (frequently) by babes.

It seems that a “dating hierarchy” comes with gobs of money. The bottom position has a minimum of 500,000 grand a year. Minimum. Looks, PERSONALITY, INTELLIGENCE, and chemistry are completely null and void. If you’re a dude who comes from wealth, even more so if you’re “famous” (or if your parents were), Status, society, inheritance, bloodlines, and Rolls Royces are what guarantees you a date. Love is measured in gold, last names, thick wallets and RSVP’s. Read More »

Joe Francis is more than just a sleazebag rich kid who cajoles drunk girls into making out and flashing their boobs.

He’s more than a crybaby who had a panic attack in jail and was tied up in his own home. He’s more than an obnoxious frat boy in a designer suit.

Joe Francis is a good guy.

At least according to Joe Francis.

Meetjoefrancis.com is the Girls Gone Wild creator’s new online endeavor to show the world that his past behavior was all a misunderstanding…something he’s been plagued by his whole life.

“I’m excited to have this opportunity to introduce myself to you personally.” Francis writes on his homepage.

“Over the years, I’ve gotten used to being misunderstood.”

“From as early as the first grade, when a teacher’s aide took offense at my efforts to get her attention by putting a tack on her chair, to more recently, when a certain Southern judge took a relentless interest in putting me behind bars, it seems that I have been in a constant struggle just to be understood as a regular guy trying to get by in life.”

Putting a tack on someone’s chair to get attention? More like putting a tack on someone’s chair to watch them sit on a tack and laugh. Read More »

We’ve all heard about Asshole McPerv’s recent legal snafus, and apparently, he’s paying for them—with jail time.

All the money in the world couldn’t save Joe ‘Douchbag’ Francis from spending the first part of spring cooped up in a cell, and I guess the orange jumpsuit life isn’t suiting him at all.

“He can’t sleep. He hasn’t eaten properly. He’s prone to anxiety attacks” claims Francis’s laywer, “He came back to his cell from a (lawyer) visit (this past week) and was told that he wouldn’t get his Xanax pill because he’d missed the medication cart that day. He went into a full-blown anxiety attack.”

May I be the first one to start laughing hysterically? Guess Mr. ‘Girls Gone Wild’ isn’t as cool as everybody thought. Guess Mr. ‘Girls Gone Wild’ is just as prissy as the chicks he feeds alcohol to until they undress themselves for a camera. He must have been so busy making poor man’s porn that he missed the memo that clearly explains how jail is not a vacation.

I’m sure he’ll get out too early and pay his way into a quick trial, but for every day he’s behind bars, I smile a little wider. Let this be a lesson to assholes everywhere: eventually, it’s all gonna catch up to you, and when it does, ain’t nothin’ gonna save your butt from feeling the burn of Karma’s payback.