I remember the day Britney and K-Fed filed for divorce.

I remember it being a shocking revelation that the two trainwrecks were parting, leaving two little mistakes in their wake.

I also remember placing bets on how long it would be before Kevin wouldn’t be able to come near Brit-Brit’s babies. I was so confident that it wouldn’t take a month, that I made a bet with my roommate at the time. K-Fed was a grungy, skeezy, pot-head dancer…there’s no way he could be a decent father! Right?

Well, my roommate won that bet, my friends, and I need to officially pay up starting today.

Britney Spears has lost custody of her kids. According to TMZ, “L.A. County Superior Court Judge Scott Gordon issued an order today, stating that Kevin Federline, the boys’ father, “is to retain physical custody of the minor children on Wednesday, October 3, 2007 at 12:00 PM until further order of the court.”"

It’s about time. Britney is a drug addict. Plain and simple.

She likes the attention. She likes the pictures. She wants us to see her looking like a heap of garbage. Call her masochistic but she wants this for herself. She’s “troubled” y’all and its completely disgusting.

If this is what drugs do to you, physically and mentally, I am counting my lucky stars I never got mixed up in them.

Hats off to Kevin Federline for coming off sane and grounded. Maybe I’m wrong, but I just can’t hate a man who can…I don’t know…handle himself?

Britney, your looks are gone. Your marriage is gone. Your kids are gone.

Time to f*cking grow up. You’re pathetic.

Did the judge make the right decision?

If you’ve accidentally caught Paula Abdul’s new Bravo reality show Hey Paula, you know what a boring snoozefest it truly is. If you’ve spared yourself the misery, I can break the episodes down in one sentence: Paula acts weird, cries about people not understanding her, bitches about being tired, and claims she’s an amazing person.

Repeat that sentence fifty times and you’ve got yourself a series.

These days, if you’re a semi-famous celebrity, you’ve got a reality show. Careful editing and funny camera work makes you seem normal and almost endearing in front of a national audience, but as soon as the crews go home, you go back to being an almost nobody who has a big problem with something (which usually gets worse after a quick reboot of fame). Read More »

Ok. Enough is enough. Lending your name to a restaurant, or even a hamburger grill is one thing, but a search engine? For f@#k sake, give me a break. According to “Attack of the Show” on G4tv, K-Fed, the no-class, jack-ass has done just that. Thank God Google is getting into the mobile phone biz, because the competition from SearchWithKevin.com just might put the industry leader into chapter 13.

But no really, all kidding aside, this is why I switched- every time you enter a search on Mr. Spear’s engine, you might just win a prize, like an invitation to K-Fed’s B-day party, or better still, an autographed 8 x 10. It is so much fun I just can’t help myself.

As an entertainer / spokesperson, where do you go from here? K-Fed the Queen-Sized Maxi Pad?