Angelina Jolie the Barbie looks remarkably like Angelina Jolie the person

Speaking of dolls (caution: WEIRD)

LC Drinks it, so should you

Freakiest mom ever?

Locklear’s arrest a setup!

THE Viral Video

Britney accidentally admits her VMA awards were staged

What you need to be one of Hef’s bodacious babes

Teenybopper dream job: have sex with a Jonas Bro

The Princess Diary’s assests…

Gossip Guys on the Gay rumors

Kurt Cobain: in blunt form

Daniel Craig, your title sucks

Aw, Leo wants little leos!

Admit it. I’m sure most of you have met THIS guy at a party. He’s not exactly attractive (or is downright HAGGARD) and you don’t bother giving him the time of day, let alone a conversation. Then all of sudden, he picks up a guitar and it’s like a halo appears over his head.

His tangled beard is no longer gross, now it’s “rugged.” His dirty sneakers don’t reek anymore, now they’re “vintage.” It’s like there is some secret blinders installed in every single guitar on the planet that are ignited the second the boy starts strumming. And, speaking from experience, it becomes even worse when they play one of “your songs.” Unexpectedly, the ugly boy has become a guitar god in your eyes and you are smitten.

Sadly, this phenomenon isn’t exclusive to us mere mortals. It’s carried over into the world of celebrity, granting horrible to mediocre-looking fellows a chance to shine too. In fact, without their guitars, it’s doubtful whether these five men would have had a career at all because, god knows, they don’t have the looks to carry them through Hollywood. Read More »

Hottie of the week
Oh, hellooooo, Johnny Depp. I didn’t mean to watch the MTV Movie Awards, but the two times that I accidentally watched, there he was. He banged my eyes stupid.

Kurt Cobain’s ashes were stolen from Courtney Love. Did she stage that so that people would talk about her? Seriously, that’s awful. I miss Kurt and Nirvana.

Fashion
Where are you going Grandma?
Lily Allen, Bambi spewing blood on your dress freaks me out – it is not fashionable.

You need to know that despite what TMZ told you, Jamie Lynn Spears will not raise her child in a barn .

Song of the Week
Still with the “Lollipop“.

Politics
Finally, the dems have a candidate.

Quote of the year
“If I punched every bitch who called me fat, it would be dead bitches all up and down the highway” I’m gonna say it – I love Star Jones.

The WTF of the week
How the hell do two toolboxes like Heidi and Spencer make millions of dollars? That’s it – I’m never writing about these two ever again. $500 might grow on their tool tree just for me typing this about them. P.S. Heidi, just design your sh*tty clothes because you are never gonna get an Oscar. Read More »

Every girl who is a fan of a band has her favorite guy. It’s a fact. Even if she likes the band 95% because of their music, I can guarantee you that she at least likes the band 5% for the boy on stage who she’s got a crush on.

I was spoon-fed Nirvana and multiple other Seattle bands from my older brother during my preteen years. I was just learning what it was to be attracted to a boy then and Kurt Cobain was the first object of my displaced infatuation. His mystique to me was an amalgam of talent, drug use, insanity, humility, and…oh yeah…the fact that he was dead. I focused so much of my hormonal energy on Kurt Cobain that I never looked behind the drum set to scope out that long haired drummer who kind of looked like a horse. Dave Grohl, as far as I was concerned, was just Kurt’s drummer. And I wasn’t the only person who saw it in this stupidly ridiculous way.

Over the years, I’ve grown older and beyond my stage of having crushes on deceased boys. As I’ve become more in tune with the world of music with each day, it’s been hard not to notice something about the former Nirvana member: He never quits. When I found out he was playing with one of my favorite bands, Queens of The Stone Age, a few years back, my interest was aroused. It seems as though between the Foo Fighters, his own metal throwback band Probot, and countless other projects…the man just never stops.

So while perusing the biography section at the library a couple weeks ago, I had to give the Dave Grohl biography a bit of a double take. Sealed together with a black and white cover that gracefully stretches his married and not-so-horse-like-anymore face across it, the book simply called out to me to take a peek. Not only was it an easy read, but I now officially have a new crush. Read More »

I’ll admit it right here, right now: I’ve always been a total sucker for the “artsy” guy. Now that I’m venturing into single early twenties territory, I’m sorta wishing Kurt Cobain hadn’t been my love interest when I was younger.

If I could have just had a super crush on a lawyer…or even a football player…maybe everything would be more normal in my love life.

Maybe I wouldn’t find myself waking up on an air mattress in a loft in Williamsburg… pinching myself and then repeating over and over, “He’s an ARTIST, Elizabeth…he’s an ARTIST.”

But I’m an artist, too. Hell, all I do is write everything from books to songs all day. I even paint. And take pictures. And I dance. And I do mosaic. AND I sleep on a REAL bed in a real apartment that has heat and cable and plants that aren’t dead.

And so I sit on the train pondering this question. With every hipster/artsy looking boy I see, I wonder if he too sleeps on an air mattress. Is this a prerequisite for being cool?

Certainly, my artist lovers past….which would be…ugh…all of my lovers past…didn’t all sleep on air mattresses. In fact, I can only think of one other.

And then I realized: Read More »

If there’s one thing we’ve learned from recent pop culture it is that everyone loves to watch the rise and fall of Celebrities. From Britney’s Sinead O’Rebellion to Parisgate it’s as if the ultimate fate of a pop icon is to be ripped to shreds by it’s once adoring public right there on Robertson Blvd. But here comes the fun part, seeing how they put themselves back together. Because just as much as America loves a downfall it loves an embarrassing comeback even more. Every once an while though, we are in turn surprised by a true artist, although fewer and fewer are apparent in the commercial pop abyss, it’s not a legend, as Linda Perry could tell you they actually do exist.

Courtney Love is a name culturally synonymous with many things, undoubtedly an icon in her own right she has more than made her mark on the music industry, the tabloid circuit and even invaded the Golden Globes. However Love’s success did not happen overnight or in a Hollywood fairytale. She has no distant Coppola relative nor did she descend from a pop dynasty. She was in fact at war with her label, her drug addiction and her public image all at once. The widow of late legend Kurt Cobain, she has faced a constant unavoidable comparison despite her own professional accomplishments and critical accolades. Her band Hole achieved success in the mid nineties creating an army of 12 year old feminists searching for a viable role model, armed with Hello Kitty backpacks and Emily Strange stickers they are all grown up now. But the question is: Are they still listening? Read More »