The next day, Chuck and I went out to dinner after work, as we often did. This time, however, something was different: we were quiet, awkward even…not like our usual selves. The whole day had been a mess really–I didn’t think it was appropriate for us to be holding hands or kissing in front of our co-workers, so instead we had avoided each other like the plague. Flirting, which had previously come naturally to us, seemed inappropriate, as though at any moment someone would figure us out.

After dinner we kissed quickly and went our separate ways. Ugh.

I went back to our mutual friend for some back-up. “What the hell is going on? I thought Chuck liked me!”

“Do you like him?”

“Um. Of course I do! He is the nicest boy I’ve ever met, and he always treats me so well.”

“Maybe you only like him because he likes you.”

OK, fine, maybe part of the appeal was knowing I wouldn’t be rejected, but when I thought about it long and hard, I really cared about Chuck, and I wanted him to be happy.

“Do you think maybe you kissed him because you knew it meant so much to him?” Read More »

We all know him. We all have one: the best guy friend who secretly has a crush on you, and has always had a crush on you, but has sat idly by while you date total assholes. He’s there when you get your heart broken, and he never takes advantage of your vulnerability.

Then, in the movies, you wake up one day and realize that he’s the perfect guy, and that you are madly in love with him. You tell him, preferably outside when it’s raining, and you both live happily ever after.

If only.

The summer after my Freshman year, I was working your typical slave-labor job and licking my wounds after breaking up with my first real boyfriend. To comfort myself, I started dating this total asshole; he didn’t really care about me, but loved leading me on.

My best friend from work, lets call him Chuck, tried to give me advice on the situation, since I always seemed to be upset. “We got in a huge fight last night, and he kicked me out of his car!” I would whine, and he would tell me I was too good for that guy, that I should just move on.

It was obvious to everyone (besides me, of course) that Chuck was falling for me big time, and every time I talked to him about my asshole rebound boy, I was just making things worse. I was clueless. Read More »