I have an addiction. And it’s really expensive. I don’t know how to stop.

No, Lindsay Lohan, I’m not talking about cocaine. I’m talking about TV on DVD. There is nothing I love more than dropping into Best Buy and picking up two or three seasons of various shows. Some I may have seen, and some I have not, but like any good addict, I understand that one is never enough.

My first real DVD binge was on Grey’s Anatomy. Bored and home sick one day, I went to Blockbuster and ended up picking up the first disk of the first season. When the disk had finished I needed more. I had to know what happened, and immediately I grabbed my things and copped the first two seasons at WalMart.

I thought it would last, but in two days I was fresh out of Meredith and McDreamy. I didn’t really sleep in those two days, because I would just say to myself “one more episode, then bed.” But I was hooked and like Whitney to crack, I would run to the DVD player to put in a new disk.

I don’t indulge that often anymore. I have also figured out that quality comedy shows on DVD are better for the TV junkie. You cannot possibly watch five season of Family Guy without wanting to shoot yourself afterwards.

One or two episodes feels great, and then I’m satisfied. Other suggestions for those who cannot waste half their day watching the fourth season of Dawson’s Creek, The Daily Show, Chappelle’s Show, Robot Chicken, and South Park.

If you are a real junkie, take two weeks off from work and run out to buy The Sopranos, Lost, and Sex in the City. These three will keep you staring at your TV for a nice long time.

Here are my top five DVD seasons to own:

1. Family Guy, Season 3. We meet Herbert the creepy old man, and the show has quite become as scattered as it is now. Like some of the episodes actually have plots. Read More »

It’s time for Hollywood to take out the trash.

You know what I’m talking about– Lindsay, Paris, Britney, Nicole, Nicole’s unborn baby, Nicole’s ugly boyfriend, and dare I say…Christina Aguilera. Always rubbed me the wrong way, that one.

H-town is seeming more and more like a ghost town these days with its little coke-infused starlets escaping the summer grit of the city for rehab.

Rehab: it’s the new Hamptons!

But, who is there to look to now? Who will inform us, mere plebes, of fashion trends we cannot afford and only imitate feebly by shopping at Forever 21? Who will entertain us while we slave away at our precariously filing - centric summertime internships? Have we no heroes anymore? No inspiration?

I try to think of understudies for Lilo & Co, but the best I can do is a list of the boring and banal: Anne Hathaway, Natalie Portman, Jessica Biel, Scarlett Johansson. Ugh. Stars– they really are just like us. Meaning? Boring. Read More »

I remember watching The Lost Boys a few years after it came out. I was still young then, easily impressionable and scared of everything. Needless to say, the movie had me sleeping with the light on for weeks.

A few years ago I happened to catch it again. Although I’m still very easily terrified, the 80’s classic was no longer a nightmare waiting to happen—it was a dream come true. Big hair, dated special effects, comedy, Kiefer Sutherland before he was in that completely irrational and unreal Fox show…and best of all, the film introduced the world to what we now know as The Two Coreys.

Corey Haim and Corey Feldman were the Lindsay and Britney of the yuppie era, adorable, famous, and then drug addicted and ruined. Only a few years after they starred side-by-side in the vampire extravaganza, both men were strung out Hollywood garbage.

But guess what? They’re back!

Of course.What forgotten celebrity doesn’t have a TV show these days? The Two Coreys, debuting on A&E on July 29 at 10:00 / 9:00 central, is the comeback extravaganza for the now clean and sober BFFs. Read More »

The only reason I hesitate to proclaim LL’s career completely dead is because comebacks are so big these days. She could land herself a E! series, or maybe even some giant Barbara Walters special where she cries. There’s a chance Lindsay could rise again.

But just in case she doesn’t, Hollywood had better start looking for new big-boobed starlets.

A New York Times article (yup, even the grand old NYT is digging through Tinseltown garbage these days…) claims now that Lindsay has been arrested twice, she’s basically uninsuriable. And when you’re uninsuriable in Hollywood, everything fades to black.

If a production company can’t be sure a star will show up for work or stay out of jail, it’s unlikely she’ll be hired. One missed day can mean hundreds of thousands of dollars down the drain, and almost no actress is worth that kind of anxiety. Combine Lindsay’s unpredictable behavior with her less-than-stellar film record, and you’ve got a girl who can be (and most likely already has been) replaced.

Poor Things, a small independent film (that was supposed to begin shooting shortly) in which LiLo had only a supporting role, was recently plagued by rumors of an early demise after Lindsay’s first rehab stint. Since the starlet was arrested a second time, the movie’s producer claims the film is “moving on” – supposedly without the troubled star. Read More »

Lindsay Lohan needs help. Real help. Now.

Early this morning, Lohan was busted, yet again, for driving under the influence. The twice rehabbed star had a BAC that was between .12 and .13 and was driving with a suspended license.

Apparently, cops were alerted when Lohan’s white Denali was spotted chasing an Escalade (Samantha Ronson, anyone?) down the highway.

Oh and once Lohan was caught? Cocaine was found in her possession as well! Cops found the stuff in her pants pocket once they took her in and booked her. Now, it looks like she’s free on bail — $25,000 — and now all she has left to do is wait. And freak the hell out.

LiLo’s career going down the tubes has always been kind of a joke lately, but its pretty much a certainty now, no? Read More »

Let’s get real.

Suspenders aren’t especially groundbreaking or shocking, and they’re definitely not new, but it seems some of Hollywood’s most fashion forward stars beg to differ.

The trend started way back in late 2005 or early 2006 and looked to be picking up some speed; places like H&M and Forever 21 carried suspender dresses and shorts for us ladies looking to be budget trendsetters. Then, as quickly as it came, the idea seemed to just – drop off. Read More »

It’s finally happened. Orange Oprah has proved she’s a money hungry moron.

Any other mother might decide to lie low after her famous daughter gets out of 45 days of drug treatment. Any other mother would see her daughter’s rehab stint as a cry for help, a cry for a guiding light, a teacher, a mature friend, and decide to spend some quality time giving her flesh and blood what she desperately needs.

Not Dina Lohan. Dina Lohan is a different kind of mom.

Hours after her daughter spent her first post-rehab days partying in Las Vegas (smart Lindsay. Very smart), DL let it be known that she’s working on a show with the E! television network. No one’s completely sure what it’s going to be about yet, but chances are it will suck. Read More »

Being Irish-Italian carries with it a few unfortunates. I’ve got a temper that can flair up out of nowhere and an unearthly hunger for all things bread. I’m also pale. Redheaded and pale. Pale.

Because of my unsightly whiteness, I find most self-tanners look completely ridiculous on me. I don’t just turn Lindsay Lohan orange, I turn Tropicana orange.

Until this summer, I had resigned myself to carrying the semi-albino torch forever, scoping on the SPF 45 and radiating whiteness like Kiki Dunst on a ski hill. But this May, I stumbled across a product that didn’t just make good on its promise: it came through with flying colors of tan.

Jergens Natural Glow Firming Daily Moisturizer may have a long name, but that’s because it does more than your average body moisturizer. Not only does this product “firm” that cellulite, it also gives an all over summer glow that actually looks real. And unlike those other self-tanners, it doesn’t smell like musty, wet dirt. Read More »

Whoever told her to do “I Know Who Killed Me“.

This movie looks awful.

I’m not sure what about it strikes me as hideous. It might be the fact that the plot seems convoluted and stupid, that Lindsay is stripping, or that it’s rated R for “violence and gore / including torture and grisly images”. LaLohan + violence and torture = a combination I want no part of.

Considering her last movie tanked harder than a concrete block filled with bricks, Team Lohan is banking on this film to show Hollywood and the rest of the world that she’s more than a party girl.

After taking a gander at this trailer, I can’t say I’m too convinced on its breakout potential. It might earn LL a few more pubescent fans, but Oscar caliber it’s not.

What do you think, lovelies? Will you go see this movie?

Lindsay Lohan may not be a role model in the traditional sense, but if there’s one thing that we can learn from our favorite recently rehabbed starlet it’s this: Confessing your undying love on MySpace never turns out well. Ever.

According to Star, Linds and her BFF DJ Samantha Ronson are in the midst of a sordid affair — complete with love confessions via blogs and comments and have been for quite awhile now.

Wow, the stars really ARE just like us!

Any of this sound famaliar?

The following were all sent by Ms. Lohan. Try not to judge. Read More »