Oh Blohan, what are we going to do with you?

Our favorite media whore’s movie tanked over the weekend, bringing in a meager $5.8 million dollars. Georgia Rule made half of the horror sequel 28 Weeks Later’s 10 million and one tenth of Spider Man 3’s 60 million.

Ms. Redhead-blond-black-blondish red hasn’t made a hit movie since Mean Girls, and continues to have bit parts in films that do just okay (Bobby, Prairie Home Companion) or staring roles in shit fests like Just My Luck and Herbie: Fully Loaded. In addition to drug and sex issues, Blohan seems to have a disability when it comes to picking good scripts. Either that, or her wild and annoying behavior is keeping people away from her movies. Read More »

Paris Hilton and Lindsay Lohan are ruining my life. Seriously. I have said many times how much I love reading celeb gossip—it is my escape throughout the day. TMZ, Perez, Page Six, … all one stop spots for me to marvel in how the other half lives. But I honestly can’t stand to read another thing about these two morons.

Paris—throw her ass in jail. And please TMZ, stop updating me every four seconds on the state of the case. She’s an idiot who has done nothing for us except act in bad movies, or openly feuded and fucked everyone in Hollywood. Enough.

And Lindsay? I agree with Jess—I had hope for you, and now you’ve ruined it. Snort, and screw yourself into oblivion, ruin your career, do whatever it is you do, I just don’t want to hear about it.

So I’ve had to find entertainment elsewhere these days. I blindly search the internet for something of interest, and have been mostly unsuccessful in finding anything that tickles my fancy. Until I came upon this video.

Air Sex? I am weirded out, amused, confused, disgusted, intrigued… there’s really not enough words. I wonder how you gather the nerve to put your moves on in front of an audience—especially the one’s shown off here. I’ve heard of cultural differences, but this is just too strange for me. What’s going on over there?

So your daughter’s geeked on gack and f@#%s hollywood stars serially. In times like these, it’s only natural for a mother to step in. That’s just what “Mother of the Year” Dina Lohan has done. Except instead of stepping in to get LiLo the help she most desperately needs, Dina has stepped into the spotlight, to help her own career.

Yes as disqusting as it may be, Page Six reports that Dina Lohan hit the red carpet at last night’s “Georgia Rule” premiere in NYC, as a “special correspondant” for Entertainment Tonight. ET says “We are looking forward to Dina asking the questions only a mother can.” WTF ET??? Are you so irresponsible that you would allow a mother to profit off her own daughter’s addictions for a mere ratings boost? You both deserve eachother, you miserable, ignorant sluts. Read More »

Yes, the rumors are true and here are the pictures to prove it. According to Hollywoodbackwash.com, in addition to Ms. Lohan’s love for the White Lady, she is reportedly quite accomplished in the art of Star F@#$ing. Shortly after these pictures were taken, Lindsay is said to have rattled off a list of her Hollywood sexual conquests that include James Blunt, Jude Law, Calum Best, Joaquin Phoenix, Benicio Del Toro, Jared Leto and James Franco. So many boys, so many drugs, so little time… to blow them all. It is a shame acting is not an excessive habit for the young starlet. If it were, she just might be good at it.

More photos Read More »

When Lindsay Lohan said rehab, what she really meant was a few weeks to rest up so I can party even harder.

According to everyone’s favorite gossip whore, Lindsay Lohan was recently caught—on tape—celebrating St. Coke’s Day in a bathroom stall at Teddy’s nightclub in Hollywood’s Roosevelt Hotel.

The person who taped Lohan doing things such as shoving a finger up a friend’s nose to help her snort a few bumps is an alleged “friend” who is worried Lohan’s ways are going to buy her a one way ticket to that movie theater in the sky. The “friend” leaked the video to the press “So the world can know what Lindsay has been doing and she can’t lie about it to herself or anyone else.” Read More »

Whenever a celebrity, and more specifically, a pop star, is caught on camera doing something stupid, lame, idiotic or illegal, I must admit there is a part of me that relishes in the embarrassment. What can I say? I guess I’m just an evil person who finds pleasure in the oh-so-ironic pain of the rich, famous and beautiful ones who fall victim to the same thing they’ve wanted all along - the spotlight.

Blender has dug deep (as there are waaay too many to list) to establish the Top 20 Most Embarrassing Pop Star Video Moments. Some moments are recent and some are from pop’s forgotten past. Some moments are mild and some are mean. Some moments are self-induced by drugs, and some are just self-induced by plain stupidity. Whatever the case, from Nirvana to Paris, they are all golden moments, and touchstones in the culture that is pop.

Revel in K-Fed’s face as he is dumped by Britney via text. Snicker as Lindsay is publicly referred to as a “firecrotch” with giant labia. Ouch. Cringe as R. Kelly, and YES, that is indeed R. Kelly, as he checks to see that the shot of him peeing on his much younger, female counterpart, will be caught at just the right angle. GROSS. Read More »

So many parties, so little time - to sleep. What is a girl to do when the coffee, Red Bull and B-12 shots just ain’t cutting it? NinjaDude.com reports that Lindsay Lohan has found a solution to this age old dilema.

Blohan, seen here leaving a NYC club on St. Patty’s day sports a “mysterious white substance in her left nostril evidently aiding in her excitement level for the evening.”

Lindsay, a bit of advise: Try Crack. It doesn’t stick to your face.

But on a serious note, for all of you that need more info on the condition known as “Blo-nose,” please check this out.

GQ magazine has named Lindsay Lohan 2007’s Obsession of the Year. This is a terribly sad statement about “WE” as a people. Certainly we are more obsessed with what part of Britney she will shave next. Here is a tasty little excerpt from Lindsay’s interview with GQ:

Tell me about an average day in the life of Lindsay Lohan.
It starts out with a 5 a.m. hike through Runyon Canyon to watch the sunrise. Then I go outside, and I try to find the paparazzi. I go down to Robertson Boulevard, try and search for them, find them, and bring them food.

And then what do you do at night?
Well, of course, I’m sitting at the computer all night.

Have you ever read anything interesting about yourself on the Internet?
No. I wish they’d be clever and make something up for me.

There’s some interesting stuff about you. Irocman39 in Skokie, Illinois, says you’re the “smokinest woman on the face of the earth”—
God bless him.

—and that he wouldn’t kick you out of bed for eating saltines.
I don’t eat. Don’t you people know? It’s all about anorexia and bulimia nervosa.

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