This morning, when my Michigan / OSU weekend hangover finally went away, I came downstairs and found my roommates laying around the living room drinking coffee and sharing stories from their weekend escapades. Note: any normal person would assume we all would know these stories since we spent the weekend together, but it was Michigan / OSU weekend…. Without my digital camera I would have no idea what happened.

It turns out that, while in bed, my roommate’s boyfriend, drunk as a skunk (yes, I just used that phrase) made an interesting request. Anal sex.

Now, this topic may not be as taboo as it used to – perhaps we can thank Brokeback Mountain for that? – but it is still a topic I would rather leave to the porn stars than bring into my bedroom. In fact, I am constantly wondering why so many guys make the request to begin with. I get that it may feel “better.” I also can see how it will really spice up a boring sex life (to which I must respond, “So will doing it in the shower.”).

But after asking around, I confirmed my suspicions as to the real reason: the story… Read More »

I’ve always bad-mouthed online dating. And although it’s becoming somewhat normal to meet your “soul mate” through a match-making website, I’m still not into it. I’m much more comfortable doing the whole hooking up, “then I’ll decide if I want make you my boyfriend” strategy.

However, I’ve been thinking. Once I graduate from this place, I won’t have such a large pool of potential boyfriends to choose from. Think about it, where else will I have access to so many people my age?

I’m seeing now that this whole “dating” thing that happens after college probably won’t be so easy. I mean where am I supposed to meet people? The bar? Yeah, that’s classy. The gym? Um, who will want to talk to me when I’m all sweaty?

So I’ve looked into these dating websites. Just for research purposes. And have decided that if I must become part of one of them, it will only be HotEnough.org. Why? Because it’s for “fit, good looking people.” Haha. How shallow is that? But hey, I don’t want to date someone who’s not into staying in shape.

Check out this article.

Obviously I’ve got sex on the brain today.

Here are some tres interesting tidbits about the most talked about subject in the universe (thanks to breathetheoxygen):

1. According to the Kinsey Institute, the biggest erect penis on record measures 13 inches. The smallest tops off at 1 3/4 inches.
2. The most common fantasy is oral sex.
3. 8% of us have regular anal sex.
4. 60% of men and 54% of women have had a 1-night stand.
5. Women buy 4 out of every 10 condoms sold.
6. In 1609, a doctor named Wecker found a corpse in with two penises. Since then, there have been eighty documented cases of men similarly endowed.
7. Men say the average erect penis is 10″. Women say it’s 4″.
8. A female orgasm is a powerful painkiller (because of the release of endorphins), so headaches are in fact a bad excuse not to have sex.
9. 56% of men have had sex at work.
10. Among the Mangaians of Polynesia, 18-year-old couples make love
an average of three times a night, every night, until their
thirties, when the weekly average drops to a mere 14.
11. 1 in 3 of us have had an extramarital affair. Read More »

Cosmopolitan. Thanks for being all about sex. I’ll admit you’ve encouraged me to broaden my sexual horizons.

Today, I’d like to introduce the Lusty Lean. Yet another hot sex position. It requires some tact, but if done right can be faaantastic.

Directions:
Climb up on the bed or a chair with your back to him and squat down. Have him stand behind you, so your shoulders are against his chest. Lean on him as he steadies you by placing his hands on your hips or under your rear. Tell him to enter you from behind. Think of your knees as little springs and enhance his thrusting with your own little moves.

Why Cosmo Says You’ll Love It:
Leaning back on his chest and bracing yourself on his biceps, you’ll feel totally taken care of, and he’ll feel more studly than a first-string stallion. Plus, gravity is on your side, giving him hot, deep access combined with more of a grinding motion than the usual from-behind fast thrusting.

Cosmo’s Tip:
Once you have the rhythm down, change it up a little. So long as he can support you in his weakened state, have him take half a step back. Upping the angle will alter where his penis hits your vaginal walls, enhancing your climax by drawing it out.

Yep. I’ve done it. And that’s all the detail I’m willing to disclose.

But let’s talk about this precarious position for a second because yea, it feels pretty good, but it’s also a tough one to maneuver. First of all, you’ve got placement to consider — if you aren’t careful, someone could get a knee or foot in the face and that’s a real mood killer. So being smooth is pretty major.

Once you’ve made it down there successfully, you’re faced with a penis (which can be uncomfortable and/or scary). And as things get going you have to concentrate on getting him off while he’s trying to, for lack of a better/cooler word, pleasure you. Honestly, that’s hard to do when you’re probably a little self-conscious that you’re both getting so up-close-and-personal, not to mention trying to enjoy what’s happening.

To make things a little easier here are some tips (hey, I’m no expert, I’m just going by what I’ve “heard“). Read More »

Oh yes, the wait is finally over. The now infamously over-hyped “Kim Kardashian Superstar” sex tape hits the stands today at a porno shop near you. Can somebody remind me again, why I should care about this talentless nobody getting shagged and dragged every which way AND loose?

Maybe I am out of line. And to Kim’s defense, I have yet to see this vacant Vivid Video release- Who knows, maybe she polishes a knob like nobody’s business and we all could learn a trick or two from the superstar socialite. Pfft… Doubtful. I think the only trick here is Kim herself.

There is however an upside for Ms. Kardashian. According to NinjaDude.com, portions of the video have been edited out- “most notably the watersports portion.” Don’t worry shower fans, you still got R Kelly.

Yeah, yeah yeah. We have all heard it a thousand times - “It’s not the size of the boat, but the motion of the ocean.” Sh-aah, If even- whatever. I hate to be the bearer of bad news for you dudes out there, but it’s the SIZE of the boat. C’mon, deep down you knew she was only trying to make you feel better.

OK, here’s the deal. It’s not the middle that’s the problem, it’s the low and high end of the spectrum that has something to worry about. The fact of the matter is, we are just not designed to accomodate a horse, and likewise, an angry inch just won’t cut it. I found some testimonials on utterpants.com that will hopefully set the record straight. Take a look.

Amy, 32, said, “I should at least be able to feel some kind of penetration. Either the ruler he’s using has shrunk even more than his dick or he was too busy playing with himself when he should have been learning how many inches there are in a foot. If he’s eight inches then my Nissan Micra is a bloody BMW!

Does Size Matter?

Read More »

The creators of the “sac-relig-a-riffic” Pope John Paul II - Commemorative Thong with Matching Camisole are most certainly going to hell for this one, but they will be looking fly on the way down.

I mean c’mon, what better way to canonize the glorious life of the late, great PJP2, than with some dope-ass unmentionables from Dope Pope Wear.

Oh, this is so VERY, VERY WRONG.

Wow! I stumbled upon this gorgeous little audio clip on PharmaGossip.com and OMG- this will absolutely kill you.

The long and the short of it is, This guy is about to propose to his girlfriend of 4 years, when he finds out she was caught giving some “oral dictation” to her Boss in the bathroom stall at the company Christmas Party. So, instead of breaking up with her in person, he recruits some help from a local radio show.

The result is painfully cruel- Gorgeous, I tell you.