I have been in college for almost a month, and so far my biggest problem is something I’ve done quite easily — making friends.

During Orientation, people began to cling together because, in truth, all of us were friendless. So my group of friends developed depending on with whom I ate lunch one day, who also got lost trying to return to my dorm after a party, or who was sitting next to me at one of the many assemblies. I am not complaining about my friends — they are all genuinely nice people - but I wonder: if we had gone to school from pre-K to twelfth grade, would they even give me a second glace? Would I give them?

I feel like making these friends so hastily isn’t really making any true connections. Maybe this is because I’ve never moved away, and so have known all my high school friends for years. I know them inside and out, and I am really grateful for them. Now I have plenty more people programmed into my cell phone than I did in last fall. I can call over ten girls to go eat lunch, or procrastinate by watching a movie. I can say hello to at least five friends every time I walk somewhere.

But what kind of claim is that, when I don’t know anything about them other than the generic five questions I have asked and been asked for the last few weeks. 1) What’s your name? 2) What dorm do you live in? 3) What are you interested in studying? 4) Where are you from? 5) Do you want to exchange cell phone numbers?

There is no number 6: What is it about you that would make us good friends? Read More »

It’s September 2nd, which means we must tuck our bikinis back in their drawers, slather ourselves in aloe vera, and hang our heads low as we mourn the coming end of summer. This also means that school is starting again, and for incoming college freshmen this brings a whole new kind of dread.

Sure, you’re excited to meet new people, take classes you chose out of your course catalog, and maybe even explore a new city. But there are things to worry about. A lot of them. Maybe it’s that you’re living away from home for the first time, or living across the country. There are more things you need to be prepared for than just athlete’s foot in the communal showers (plastic sandals will take care of that).

As someone who survived four years and two colleges and managed to graduate with all four of my limbs and at least a bit of dignity, I feel I should imbue on you, humble reader, ten important lessons and tips to help you enjoy college safely and happily, from picking classes to surviving alcohol poisoning.

1. Make orientation week count. I skipped a lot of the activities scheduled for orientation week and later came to regret it. I didn’t want to wake up at 9 AM to go on a tour of Boston, but what I didn’t realize is that a lot of people did wake up at 9 AM to go on a tour of Boston and, in doing so, met all those other people who got up at 9 AM to go on a tour of Boston. You’re not going to meet people if you hole up in your room, so go out as often as you can.

2. Taste-test classes. So you didn’t get into that History of Watching TV class you really wanted to take, go to the first class or two anyway. You’ll be amazed at how many people drop out of the class and a space for you may become available. The same goes for a class with a bad teacher. If sucky prof is teaching a general ed class you have to take, visit the same class taught by a different teacher. In my experience, a great teacher can make any class interesting and enjoyable. Read More »

So you enter your freshman year of college a confident single gal (or guy) ready to take on your new independent lifestyle and hopefully meet some hotties. The first week of college you meet someone who you happen to really hit it off with. A few weeks later, you’re still talking to this special someone and you start to wonder where this is all going.

But is it really a good idea to start dating someone you’ve only known for two weeks into your freshman year?

In my experience, no.

Freshman year is all about new experiences, whether it be living with someone you don’t know or having to do your laundry for the first time. While the idea of meeting a new boyfriend or girlfriend is exciting, the first semester of college might not be the best time to start thinking of a long term relationship.

I met a guy during the summer at one of my school’s orientations and I continued to talk to him once we met up in the fall. We started hooking up almost immediately after classes began and I wondered if he was feeling as strongly as I was about him. I soon realized, as he hooked up with multiple other girls, that there really were no feelings involved on his part. He announced that it was no big deal since he and I weren’t officially anything and he didn’t want anything serious his first year. I was hurt because I had read too much into the situation. Even more, though, I was angry at myself because I could have spent the time getting to know other people (or studying) instead of hanging out with him. Read More »

[Read the previous installment of my study abroad experience, I Could Really Use a “Not For Tourists” Guide About Now]

Alright, you’ve just arrived in a new city, eager to explore all it has to offer and excited for classes to begin. Making friends should be easy, right? Well, maybe not…

As I mentioned before, I arrived in Dublin well before my classes started, so I had to wait a few weeks to meet the people in my program. I assumed I’d meet people in my dorm, but I soon realized that a) my dorm only had 12 single rooms and b) no one had moved in yet. Damn. One morning I heard signs on life on my floor, so I went into the communal kitchen to have a look. There I met Colin, who immediately informed me that he knew everything about our school because he went there for undergrad and his masters and now his PhD, and his dad was some important dean. He talked my ear off for an hour, including as many details as possible (including the fact that he had JUST moved out of his parents house…shocking!), until I finally managed to excuse myself. Good lord. Read More »

Alright, what the hell, you’re in this four-hundred person lecture and just your luck, you can’t spot a single familiar face. Now what?

Spend the rest of the semester in studying solitude? Stalk a TA to answer all your simple assignment questions? Maybe you’ll just skip every class and hope your professor puts the notes online.OR, you could grow some balls and MAKE some friends. Doesn’t class go by a lot quicker when there’s someone you can pass notes to during?

It does, trust me.

So sure, it’s a little intimidating when there’s more people in your Philosophy lecture hall than there were in your graduating senior class of high school, but don’t worry, a bunch of the kids around you are looking for someone to strike up a conversation with as well. It’s really quite easy:

Ask questions.
From ‘Do you have any idea what Professor Sherman is talking about?’ to something as simple as, ‘Can I borrow a pen?’. Simply asking a question can kickstart a classroom friendship made in heaven. How else are you going to make study groups and pass the class? Or even better, get an invite to that kickass Men’s Soccer party this Saturday. Read More »