Be Careful Out There, Ladies!

Miami University in Oxford, OH
(yea, confusing right?) conducted
a survey to see just how aware
young college women are about
the dangers of “drug-facilitated
sexual assault.” The findings were
surprising…and pretty scary. So we
all know about roofies and not to
accept drinks from guys cuz they’re
probably creeps who want to take
advantage of us. Read More...

 

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Man Junk. Yes, It’s Exactly What it Sounds Like.

manjunk.jpgThey have shampoo to clean your hair, soap to clean your body, and face wash to clean your…duh… face.

“But what about a man’s scrotum?!” you ask. Well, now they have that too.

Ladies and (especially) gentlemen, I present to you: Man Junk.

I know what you are thinking (”Oh what a glorious day! Hallelujah! Finally, no more sweaty stench!”), and I am right there with you.

There have been products on the market to keep women so fresh and so clean (clean) for years, so it is only fair that a product was developed to do the same for men. I mean, men are constantly complaining about what goes on downtown on a woman, but they have no clue what we are dealing with in their nether regions.

Mainly: the scent.

According to the Man Junk website, normal male body soaps are not strong enough to mask the Eau de Scrotum of a man (Editor’s Note: Don’t I know it! Daaaamn.), so some super smart guys got together to create this organic body wash focused on this one main zone. Which makes things much more pleasant… for everyone.

This sounds like a dream come true…if our boys would actually go out and purchase it. Which I imagine they would do right after they offer to pick up our tampons. Read: never. Most guys would die before they would let on to anyone that their scrotum may possibly stink. Hell, most guys won’t even entertain that thought for themselves! So, that means that it is up to us, ladies, to make the Man Junk purchase….or withhold on the trips downtown until the boys do.

Whoever picks up this product, I think we all owe the people behind Man Junk a giant “OMGThankYouSoMuch!

So, thank you, makers of Man Junk. We, the women of CollegeCandy, salute you.

Gay Virginity For Sale!

lance-bass.jpgSo, apparently the Wall Street crisis is hurting people in more ways than we thought. We’ve discovered yet another desperate person trying to sell sex to pay off debt.

Remember that crazy, desperate college grad student from Sacramento who tried to sell her virginity to pay for her student loans (I guess working and saving is just not as profitable)?

Well, looks like she inspired someone because after Johnny No Name blew away the severance pay he was offered when he was let go from his investment banking firm position, he decided to move on to selling his gay virginity online — because whoring yourself out is the must have job of the year.

What is gay virginity, anyway? According to him, it’s a hand job and/or blow job, but absolutely no anal (at least not part of this specific deal), because he’s not gay. Sure, keep telling yourself that.

The real comedy comes when he swears to the bidders he is “HOT” and looks like Adam Brody. Well Johnny, if you’re so “HOT,” maybe you should try to model your way out of debt instead of selling a hand and blow job.

…Just a suggestion.

It may or may not shock you, but where there is one desperate person there is of course a few more; currently Johnny No Name has a high bid of $11,000.

You gotta loves those brothels in Nevada and Rhode Island, thanks to them this is all perfectly legal. I wonder if Mr. No Name’s plane ticket from New York to Nevada is included in the bid?

This is just another piece of evidence that shows how far people will go for money and sex. Would you sell your body to pay off thousands of dollars of student loans?

Tuffy Luv Says You Deserve Better

cheatingGot something to ask Tuffy Luv? Email her at asktuffyluv@gmail.com and hold onto your hat. Because it’s windy out here.

PS Tuffy’s column will now appear every other Tuesday! So write in lots!!!

Dearest Tuffy Luv,

I have been dating a gentleman, “Bob”, for well over a year now. I left my boyfriend of five years to be with Bob. In the past few months, Bob has lied on several occasions about where he is, who he’s with, etc. He deletes phone calls and text messages because he’s scared I might “get upset over nothing”. I’m leaving for college in a week and will be two hours away. This past week, I found out he kissed one of his former student athletes (he was a swim coach). He begged me to take him back and I caved. This is the second time he’s cheated on me but I can’t seem to hold him accountable. How do I just make myself cut the ties when he makes me happy outside the lies?

Sincerely,
A woman scorned

Dear Woman Scorned,

I think you just blew my mind.

Seriously. Do you honestly believe him that he’s just scared you’ll, what was the term he used, “get upset over nothing?” My guess is, you don’t. Because otherwise you wouldn’t have written in. Read More »

5 Worst Things to Say During Sex

girl-in-bed-bubble.jpgI am an expert in awkward situations. When I first meet people, more often than not, I leave a horrible first impression. I am similarly awkward in my attempts to be a part of the dating scene.

Just last week, a coworker exclaimed, “Kathryn, you have no game. Your entire approach is off!” Yes, this is true. But somehow, I still get some action, which is why she followed her (rather harsh) declaration with the question, “How do you do it?”

Still, no matter how many times I’ve immediately wished I could retract the bizarre statement that just came out of my mouth, I’ve also been with, or had friends who have been with, equally hopeless guys.

Reviewing my own traumatic events, as well as some of my friends’ bizarre sexual encounters, I’ve compiled a list of some of the worst things to say during sex. Because I’m a woman, they are written from a female perspective, but each of these can be just as cringe-worthy coming from a guy.

1. “Ohhhh, Michael… I mean… Dan?”
Make sure you know the name of the person you’re inviting past the pearly gates. Calling someone by another name will at once crush your partner’s ego and make you look sleazy. Once, I was hooking up with a guy and he proceeded to pour out his feelings for another girl… and try to get my advice on how to go about courting her. That really sucked, and he was pissed when I cut our session short. Read More »

The 5 Not-So-Obvious Places to Meet a Man

yoga.jpg

Sometimes, the best things in life come unexpectedly. Like that time you ran into a store “just to browse” and you found a rockin pair of jeans for super cheap. Or when you got randomly paired up with your roommate and now you can’t imagine how you lived the last 20 years without her- you swear you must have been separated at birth.

This got us thinking - that perhaps, the best MEN in life also come unexpectedly… not only is timing everything, but apparently so is location. So we’ve put together the 5 most unlikely places to meet a man. Try them out or try out an unlikely place of you very own…

The 5 Most Unlikely Places to Meet a Man Read More »

Was Michelangelo Hot?

david_von_michelangelo.jpgI almost wish I lived in the 1500s so I could bang Michelangelo.

There, I said it, and I’m only a little embarrassed about it. I just returned from a two-week sojourn to Berlin and Florence, and the single most amazing thing I saw (and have perhaps ever seen) is Michelangelo’s sculpture of David.

Nothing has ever, ever made me want to get with somebody so much.

Until you see the sculpture in person, it’s easy to pass it off as a commodity. No picture can do it justice, and it’s hard to understand just how incredible it is without seeing it for yourself. The main thought going through my mind as I stood there looking at it, though, was, “Holy cow. How the hell could Michelangelo sculpt a man as anatomically gorgeous as this one? He must have used himself as a model, because the details are just too precise. Michelangelo must have been freaking hot!

This might seem ridiculous, but trust me, it’s not. There are details on David that pictures just don’t show. The veins in the arms, the just-so rippling of the hip and thigh muscles, the soft framing of the bone structure in the hands…it’s all there, and I am convinced that no artist could ever create that kind of detail without using a reference. And when you’re sculpting a nude that’s the same sex as you are, the easiest reference to use is yourself.

Conclusion: Michelangelo must have been ripped. Read More »

Will He Hold the Door, Or Elbow You in the Face?

polite man

Chivalry is not dead. It’s alive and well—or, at least alive.Since moving to New York, I have come across varying degrees of gallantry. Some is well intentioned and friendly; while some has a faded, slightly sour quality. Some acts of chivalry are carried out with genuine kindness, and some are done because the guy can’t bare the thought of letting a woman exert any kind of power.

How do you know what level of chivalry you’re getting on a daily basis? Read on.

LEVEL 1: On this, the brightest and friendliest level, the guy is being polite and helpful because he wants to be. Opening a door for you, standing up so you can take his seat on the subway, giving you room to pass on the sidewalk, all of these things are done with a smile and a pleasant glance. This guy’s mama taught him well, and it’s no trouble at all for him to show women that he holds them in high esteem.

Although it’s rare, this level does indeed exist, and I recommend immediately inquiring if such a polite lad has a partner, and if finding him to be single, snatching him up as quick as possible. Read More »

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