Last night’s episode of Project Runway was strange without Blayne. No “icious,” no hot pink sweatshirts… I felt bad that he had to leave, but I know he is happily lying in a tanning bed somewhere, soaking up the artificial rays.

We are down to six designers now, but only one of them really has any talent: Korto. The rest are just sorta coasting by with their crappy designs, poor quality and total lack of a fashion sense. And that couldn’t have been more obvious than in last night’s challenge.

The challenge was actually an interesting one that we can all connect to. The designers were to create a look for recent college graduates who were heading out into the working world. Oh, and their moms were coming to stir things up a bit.

As I watched the designers attempt to appease both mother and daughter (or in the case of Anna, drag queen and daughter…seriously, did you HEAR HER TALK!?), I tried to imagine how it would go if my mother and I were part of the episode.

“I like black, white, and gray. I like classic lines, but very trendy looks.” I would tell the designer.
“What about this bright orange and yellow swirly pattern? Or these culottes?! HOW CUTE IS THIS LEOPARD SKIRT?!” My mother would react. And then she would somehow guilt the designer into making what she wants me to wear, which she has been doing to me since I was 4. Read More »

The hot tub: thought by many to be the ultimate in places to have sex.

It’s comfortable, relaxing, heated - it’s the aquatic equivalent of sex itself! So why should you not have sex in one?

According to studies by a (virgin) urologist, hot tub humping may not be very safe.

The old rumor of man becoming infertile after too many trips to the tub has been proven correct - but how long must you stay in the water? A week?

If your guy’s testicles have been heated up to a rolling boil, yes - you should probably get out of the hot tub.

It’s also common knowledge that yes, you can get pregnant in a hot tub. make sure Aquaman wears a condom, and all of your troubles will be gone.

In other words, don’t let anybody - scientists, urologists, virgins, moms - deprive you of experiencing the ultimate. It’s all of our God-given right to experience hot tub sex. Read More »

When we first got a computer—and the internet—my sister and I pitched a fit. At age 8, I was sure that this thing called the “web” my mother was so engrossed with, was a passing fad. My mother has always been technologicaly minded, I mean the woman was getting New Zealand pen pals for her fifth grade class in ‘97. Now she’s assigned homework to 11-year-olds via her webpage and getting her class to create podcasts. Which is why, in this day and age, it is a bit easier for my mom to keep tabs on my whereabouts day in and day out.

I’ll have to admit that I’m horrible about calling home. For the most part, my life is just so damn busy and by the time I think to call, its way past their bed time. Fortunately for my mother (who has just learned to text… she never could get cell phones) she can harass me lovingly in about five different technological forms.

Point in case:

Mom 6/6/07 10:28 am: Hi call me!

Mom 6/6/07 1:33 pm: Please call me and let me know how u r! Read More »