When I say “silver medal”, I’m not talking about the Olympics or sports or anything like that. I’m talking about men. I know most girls hate being a guy’s first when the v-card cashing in isn’t mutual. But I think the worst is being a guy’s second.

My first experience being a silver medal was during freshman year. There was a guy I thought was cute and funny, and I had him in my room late one night watching all of the Saw movies. My roommate was going to be gone all night, so I figured I’d make a move…and he decided to be a whiny bitch about it!

Let’s rewind here a second: this dude’s girlfriend (who he tried to keep after going to college and who I later found out was only a freshman when he was a senior in high school. scuzz bag) broke up with him 4 months ago, but he’d been flirting with me excessively. The movie marathon was his idea. The timing, in my head, was perfect.

Sure, I could be considered the rebound girl, but I wasn’t looking for anything serious.  So I start kissing him, and he starts crying! YES. CRYING!

His Ex was dating other guys, they’d only gone out for 2 months, been broken up for like I said, 4 months, and yet this guy won’t stop talking about how “she still loves me” and “we’re going to get back together, I know it”. I couldn’t believe what I was hearing! Until I found out that this girl was his first. I proceeded to give him a hug, tell him it was ok, and send him home. Read More »

Today is Friday. Tomorrow is Saturday. That means the stock exchange is closed, which also means that the economy can’t crash for 2 whole days! Wahoo! Grab you’re your favorite snacks (fat is in!) and celebrate!

That is the best news we’ve heard all week, but that isn’t saying much after the week we’ve had:

Gay rights activists get locked out of a campus, a**holes continued to break girls’ hearts, celebs got all cocky on us, Joe Six Pack made an appearance, the presidential candidates “debated,” we had to watch Rachael Ray porn, Bubba had some transgender issues, our boyfriend posted that (PRIVATE) sex tape online, and I missed out on a fantastic opportunity to get with my campus’s most notorious man-whore.

But don’t worry; Barack Obama can make it all better! (No, that was not a political statement…that was a sexual one.)

Happy Friday, peeps.

You meet a guy. He’s cute, he’s charming and he makes you want to take off your clothes and jump his bones. And then - score! - he asks to come home with you. So, you finish your drink (read: chug that bitch), say goodbye to your friends (read: scream to them across the bar, “LATER, LADIES!), hail a cab and head back to your place.

As you fidget with the keys to your house you begin to think to yourself, this guy is too good to be true. There must be something wrong with him. Right? But what could it be? Bad in bed? Weird rash? Miniscule manhood?

Not that it matters - it’s the motion in the ocean, right? Well, now you can know exactly what you are dealing with…down there. Yes, ladies, someone has done the unthinkable: they took a condom and a ruler and put it all together into one handy dandy little (or, if you’re lucky, big) package. Read More »

Ever notice how you always see a hot chick/ugly dude couple, but never see a smokin’ dude with a non-so-smokin’ lady?

There’s a reason, ladies, and it has to do with science.

Researchers at the University of California recently studied the preferences of single women and found that women prefer brains over biceps, something I have been telling people for years. However, this finding doesn’t only apply to long term relationships; when lookin’ for a little late night action (read: one night stand), women also tend to go for the more intelligent men.

When considering evolution, it makes sense that women would want to settle down with a smart man: so they could potentially produce smarter children. But researchers were shocked about the one night stand situation. I am not.

We all know there is that awkward time - usually around 30-60 minutes - between taking the man home for a little fun and actually having said fun. A time that is filled with awkward conversation about your classes, the pictures on your wall and…I don’t know….politics?

And who wants to have conversation with an idiot?

Also, a smarter man is probably more likely to know how to please a woman, as opposed to a moron who can’t tell a va-jay from an elbow.

I’m not sure this study was really necessary (I mean, duh), but it does help me prove to men that women aren’t as concerned with looks as they are. Oh, and it gives hope to those computer engineers out there that they too can get a little late night booty.

Last weekend the biggest man whore on campus asked me to go home with him. My first reaction was, “Hell yeah! HE KNOWS WHO I AM…and he wants to do me!!!” Which was immediately followed by, “Ew, do I have to get tested for STDs cuz he just talked to me!?”

I said no that night (and by “said no” I mean “spent the rest of the night on the bathroom floor vomiting up Jimmy Johns and Jameson”), but I have been thinking about it ever since. I mean, we are Facebook friends now, so the opportunity is obvi still there.

I have always been a big fan of pro/con lists, so I am going to make one here. So, here it is: The Pros and Cons of Hooking Up With a Major Man Whore. I hope this helps if you are ever presented with such a conundrum. Read More »

Just because you’ve finally hooked up with someone, doesn’t mean anything has been solidified or any questions have been answered. In fact, the love sesh may have raised even more questions: was it good? Was it just a fling, or were there feelings involved? Is it going to happen again? Should you regret it? Does he regret it? Can you go back in time and pretend it never happened?

Depending on the relationship you had with the guy before the hook-up; the scenarios in which you’ll interact after the hook-up; and how much discussion you had before, during, and after the hook-up, the first “reunion” can be totally smooth, or completely cringe-worthy. And, for the record, the first reunion does not include your first words the morning after when both of you are still in bed…naked…and possiby still drunk.

How do you deal? If your first meeting with your last fling falls into one of the following categories, you need to work on your post-play approach.

1. The Awkward Aversion

You don’t know how he feels, and if it means avoiding rejection, you’re fine not knowing. You may respond to his presence by interrupting someone else’s conversation to avoid having to talk to him, fumbling with your phone to appear busy, or simply leaving the room. This will come off as either immature or disinterested. If he does like you and you blatantly ignore him, he’ll think you regret it. Unlike girls who want what they can’t have, guys are more likely to give up if you’ve bruised their ego. If you do like him, I suggest developing a different method. Read More »

Being in a relationship is great, but getting there totally sucks. You meet someone, start to like that someone and then go crazy trying to figure out if they like you, why they aren’t calling, if you should text them, if you should have kissed them, if telling them you love The Hills was too much information…

It sucks, which is why I think one-night stands are the way to go. Seriously, if you are safe (read: wrap that sh*t up) the one-night engagement is a total win/win. And here are 5 reasons why: Read More »

The bartender’s calling last call, but the night is still young. You’ve been chatting it up with a great guy all night, and you’re both ready to go beyond friendship and polite conversation. The question isn’t are you going to hook up? The question is where.

His Place
Pro: You don’t have to worry about the pile of dirty laundry on your bedroom floor.
Con: You have no idea if he has to worry about the pile of dirty laundry on his bedroom floor.

Your Place
Pro: You can easily access your toothbrush and contact lens solution.
Con: He can easily access all of the secrets of your medicine cabinet.

His Place
Pro: You don’t have to worry about waking up/sexiling your roommate.
Con: You have to worry about his roommates.

Your Place
Pro: You won’t have to take a walk of shame in the morning.
Con: You risk your entire floor seeing him leave your room. Read More »