Madras, seersucker, Topsiders, oh my! Resort wear has hit the co-ed set in full force. While undergraduates are known as the best of the label whores, sometimes the goal of carefully planning an outfit is more than flattering your figure. It implies, of course, that you’re en route to the country club your parents can afford.

The perk of resort wear is that it’s classy and respectable until it reaches Frat Row. You can be adorable without dressing like a desperate-to-impress freshman, all it takes is a little dedication to the cause.

Collecting argyle sweaters and linen trousers can help you transition into a non-party persona for the workplace with no trouble. Here are some tips for dressing to the yuppie role without coming off as a complete douchebag:

1) Collars down. At all times. Ladies, if you’re going for the cleavage factor and rocking a Lacoste to the bar, pair it with pumps, ass-flattering denim, and go crazy. Unbutton as low as you dare, but find a cute contrasting cami to toss under that pique polo.

2) Set a limit to the number of pastels you go with. Your boyfriend can wear as much pink as he likes, and so can you, but just remember that the phrase “too much of a good thing” came about for a reason. Read More »

The other night, as I slept soundly in my bed dreaming about my new MJ aviators, my phone started to ring. It was really late so I figured it was probably another drunk dial from one of my friends. But after picking up and hearing my friend screaming, I realized that she was either a) totally wasted and annoying or b) really having a crisis.

It was B.

It took quite some time to calm Maggie down enough to even understand her screams. All I understood was, “How could he do that to me!?” I feared the worst and made mental plans for how I would kill her boyfriend for whatever horrible thing he did to make her this upset.

And then I heard what she was saying:

“HE FARTED! He farted in front of me!”

Maggie went on to explain that upon letting the gassy offender go, Steve looked at the horror written all over her face and said, “What? I thought we were at that point.” Read More »