Taking a break from reporting the woes of the global financial crisis, today the New York Times reports that actor James Franco is physically perfect. (Okay, so maybe they didn’t get the memo when Spider-Man was released.)

According to the article, Israeli computer engineers have developed a “beautification engine” that uses an algorithm to digitally alter photographs of an individual’s face to be more attractive. Based on extensive research conducted at Tel Aviv University, the beautification engine can modify an image of a person’s face according to widely-held beauty principles (including symmetry of features, smoothness of skin, vividness of hair/eye color, among others) while still maintaining a striking, unmistakable resemblance to the original image. Read More »

The other day, I was tricked into going to Costco with my Mom. I just really wanted an excuse to wear my SWEET new rain galoshes, so I agreed to go on what I knew would be a torturously long errand. I soon found myself wandering the massive aisles, bored out of my mind, considering buying 600 plastic forks, just so I could use one to poke out my eyes. Maybe then I could go home?

I figured this was a bad idea, so I meandered over to health and beauty, where I knew I could find something to occupy myself with. And then I saw it– a Smashbox Picture Perfect Kit with eyeshadow quad, mini lip gloss trio (with pink leather mirrored case!), mascara, and face highlighter– for $19.99!! The kit came with detailed instructions on how to apply the makeup, much like other cosmetics brands that are now taking the guesswork out of makeup application . I snatched it, threw it inconspicuously into Mom’s cart and tore it open as soon as we were in the car.

Opening up the new makeup kit felt exactly the same way it did that very first time. My Grandma (against my mother’s desperate pleas not to) bought me a GIANT pink and purple kit full of awful pink lipsticks, hooker-blue eye shadow, fake mascara, fucshia blush and glitter, glitter, sweet glitter when I was three. It was then that I fell in love with makeup. I put on all of my face decorations, just like mommy did, every day before I left my house. I sometimes had loaded my face so full of makeup that it couldn’t take anymore, and, consequently, I applied some to my helpless baby brother.

Which brings me to my point. Read More »

[Want Tuffy Luv to answer your question? Email her at asktuffyluv@gmail.com.]

Dear Tuffy Luv,

Here’s my dilema. I’ve been dating my boyfriend for about 7 months. He’s great, really into me and always doing anything he can to make me happy. At first, all the “you’re so beautiful and perfect” blah blah comments were cute and flattering, as any girl would think, but he’s still doing it now, to an extreme, and it’s a little…annoying.

I mean, every girl needs a little bad boy now and then, not a mush ball ALL THE TIME. Sometimes I wonder if I’m with him because I’m afraid no one else will treat me as well as he does, but other times, I love being with him. Am I forcing it? Am I leading him on? Should I end it now, before things get further along? UGH

~Overloved

Dear Overloved,

Honey, you need to sit this boy down and tell him to cut that sh*t out.

It’s great to be flattered, but it’s only great if you know it’s sincere. And to Tuffy, it sounds like this is exactly the problem. How are you supposed to know he means it if he says it all the fricking time?! Read More »

When I walked into the room the first time I met my friend Becca, I saw her sitting at her desk and immediately hated her. She was just too perfect; she was tiny, wore great clothes, had perfect and shiny long brown hair and was just beautiful. She even had perfect freaking handwriting.

I walked past her, gave her a once over and vowed to make her my enemy. As I sat down behind her, Becca turned around and began talking to me. And she was just so nice; bubbly, friendly, funny. As much as I wanted to hate this girl, she was making it damn near impossible. Like a Lifetime after-school special, we became fast friends and have remained that way ever since. (Side note: It is still hard to hit the bars with this one because men fall instantly in love with her…while I chug beers in the corner.)

Anyhoo, yesterday I was chatting with Becca about our current man problems. Becca, it seems, is dating the perfect man who does and says the perfect things and pretty much adores her (as he obviously should…the girl is the complete package!). Yet, even with all of that, Becca finds herself doubting the entire thing and expecting the worst. She is constantly questioning if he likes her, if he wants to be with her and if she is getting too attached. Read More »

A few years ago, while working as a ski instructor up north at some unnamed resort, I made friends with an awesome guy.

A youth instructor like myself, we spent our days holding up languid 3-year-olds on the bunny slope and chasing screaming kindergarteners down larger hills, hoping against hope no one slammed into a tree in the process.

Being in a high stress (and FREEZING) situation supplied us with an instant bond, and we soon found ourselves skiing together during our free time and discussing our lives on chairlifts.

During out time together, it began to dawn on me that he was everything I had ever looked for in a guy: smart, funny, good with kids, active, gentle, and giving. He liked his parents, wrote music on his off time, and always waited for me whenever I fell into a giant snowdrift.

Basically, he was awesome. The only issue? I wasn’t attracted to him in the slightest.

He wasn’t ugly. It didn’t hurt to look him in the face or anything; he just wasn’t my type. Nothing about him made me jittery or full of butterflies, my heart never jumped when he walked into a room, and those long chairlift rides were never awkward with anticipation.

I didn’t fantasize once about kissing him. Read More »