I just read the beautifully written (but also mortifying) novella by Ian McKewan, On Chesil Beach. It’s a lovely little book, with well-drawn characters, but I think the main reason it’s been pretty famous this year is because of its infamous sex scene, a scene in which two inexperienced virgins get just about everything wrong.

Without giving it away, I couldn’t help laughing even as I blushed. At the same time, I learned a lot about what NOT to do when the realities of our bodies inevitably trip us up.

1. You must talk about sex. On Chesil Beach is set in the early sixties, a time when it was “simply impossible” for anyone to discuss sex. It’s the ultimate taboo subject even when people are married, and as a result, couples who get together barely know what to do with each other or even what to expect.

In the book, Florence is given a brief pamphlet about the bare bones of sex, but she still doesn’t have the first clue of what to do or what will happen on the man’s side of things. Because of this huge taboo of talking about sex, neither of them can talk healthily about it when things go wrong. Times have changed a lot since then, but I still think the taboo stands in a lot of situations. We’re not supposed to say certain words, protest if something hurts, or talk about what we want. But without having these difficult and embarrassing conversations, people will end up being disappointed, hurt, or just plain confused.

2. Don’t feel ashamed. A powerful sense of shame is another reason why Florence and Edward feel paralyzed in McKewan’s book. When things go wrong, Florence immediately assumes it’s her fault, she has done something wrong. Edward similarly feels ashamed for having “failed.” In reality, sex the first time is harder than TV and movies make it out to be. It takes a little finagling to get the jigsaw pieces together, so to speak, and if either girl or guy feels shame about this, it will taint the whole experience. Read More »

How many times have you been walking down the street with a girl friend only to have some guy scream, “MAKEOUT!!!”? How many times have you been minding your own business when you see 2 girls making out at the bar for attention?How many times have you wondered why guys are so obsessed with the idea of 2 girls making out?

I know that guys tend to let their peens do all the thinking, but I still just never understand why guys are so willing to do just about anything if a girl will kiss another girl. What is the point? How does that benefit the guy? Why don’t they just try to kiss the girl themselves?! I turned to my favorite male to give me the answers. Read More »

Alright, alright. We all know that I love sex. Hell, half of our readers commonly engage in calling me the S word for it. While I do love sex (FACT), I also hate the drama that comes along with my sexual partners.

Yes, I know - if I could just find a guy to stick with, it would all be easier. This is true. And maybe, just maybe, I will eventually meet a good guy who I can really rely on and want to commit to. Until then (which is off in the way distant future), I think I found a substitute.

The SaSi.

I haven’t actually tried this thing out yet, but I am deeply considering it. And once you know more about it, you most definitely will, too.

It seems as though, thanks to new technology, this little vibrator knows more about how to please women than most men do. (Editor’s Note: Which isn’t hard. Ayooooo!) SaSi has a learn mode wherein it tries all different sorts of movements. If you don’t like one, you can simply skip to the next and it remembers the ones that you prefer. The next time you use it, the SaSi will skip the stuff you hate and stick to the stuff you love. If only it were that easy with the boys…and they didn’t get all self-conscious/curled up in the fetal position and cried when you tried to guide them. Read More »

After hearing about KY Brand’s new Yours & Mine couples lubricants, I was mildly intrigued. After seeing a few more ads in magazines and one semi-funny commercial, I decided to investigate via Google.

What I found was an intricately designed website that made this lube look like the kind that astronauts would use… if they found time to do the dirty while in orbit. Extra-curricular NASA activity aside, I decided I had to try it.

I went to my local Target, dragged my boyfriend to the pharmacy aisle and asked if he was game to test drive it. $18.09 (!!!) later, we were opening up our high tech pleasure pack.

The box reflects the same “couples only” mindset that all the other marketing for this product does, which I find pretty inconsiderate of any loyal single KY customers. Slogans for Yours + Mine include “The best thing to happen to sex since love” and “It takes two…To make magic. To make love.” KY makes no effort to sell this product to those engaging in casual play.

The lubes come in 1.5 oz test tubes (they’re a lot smaller than I thought they’d be, considering the price) that faintly glow in the dark. This unnecessary (but awesome) trait earns the product bonus points with me and boyfriend, as both of us are easily amused.

Boyfriend, a biology major, gets into the whole playing scientist scheme with the test tubes and obeys the box’s directions to use “Mine” (the pink one) on me, while I use “Yours” (blue) on him. Read More »

You know when you walk into your dorm room and get a little skeeved out because it’s like, real obvious someone just had sex in there?

Well, apparently, there are people who want that slight but noticeable smell around them at all times.

Vulva Original (I’m not joking) is one of the newest sexual oddities to hit the market.

Its developers insist Vulva “is not a perfume”. Instead, they describe their product as “a beguiling vaginal scent which is purely a substance for your own smelling pleasure.”

Ew.

Developed in Germany, where a “research team” is working on complimenting the original scent with two new smells, “Exotic” and “Eighteen” (I mean, Jesus!).

Vulva Original doesn’t have much media surrounding it besides an explicit website with lots of vague references to sex. Read More »