If people judged me only by what they read on this site, they would think I am quite obsessed with orgasms. And ice cream.

And they would be absolutely right.

The only thing better than a giant scoop of vanilla melting all over an oversized warm chocolate chip cookie that also happens to be smothered in whipped cream is…wait, where was I going with this? Oh yeah. There is truly only one thing better than that. And it is a mind-blowing orgasm.

Unfortunately (not for me, thank GOD), there are women out there who cannot make that statement. For some it is because they are on a diet and don’t know quite how good that cookie/ice cream thing can be. For others, which is SO much worse, it is because they have never had an orgasm.

NEVER.
Oh the horror!

Maybe it’s time they invest in The Slightest Touch. Only the best invention since the Nike Air Cole Haan pumps. This little guy (about the size of an iPod) gives women the ability to have an orgasm whenever they want, wherever they want. No need to take chances on a guy who can’t figure out how to do it anyway. No need to pay a massage therapist to do it for you! No, my friends, all you need is a bottle of Powerade and 30 minutes to get yourself to heaven. Read More »

So, you met a hottie out on the town. Against your better judgment (because you can imagine what your mom would say if she knew what you were doing), you went home with him. And it was fun. Really fun. Your clothes are strewn around the room and if you weren’t so exhausted from the marathon romp session, you would be a bit more worried about where the hell your underwear was at the moment.

You pass out as the sun begins to peek its way out from behind the tapestry haphazardly hung over the window, the gent’s arm wrapped around your waist.

Then you wake up. You turn over the boy has his back to you. He’s snoring. You run to the bathroom to pee, trying not to wake him up, but hoping at the same time that you do. After all, it’s sorta awkward; you can’t just leave without him getting up. That would be weird.

You come back into the bed (after searching frantically in the bathroom for some mouthwash/gum and fixing your hair/makeup so you still look fresh) and he stirs. You make a joke about how tired you are and throw yourself into the bed. Random conversation ensues and most likely includes discussion of hangovers, how much you drank last night and how that water you chugged before bed was just divine.

And then….what? You know what you want to do. You want to have morning sex. Who doesn’t? Morning sex is the best way to start the day. (Some people think Wheaties is the breakfast of champions, but you and this boy both know the truth.) It is pretty much a given at this point, but neither of you really know how to broach the subject, mostly because you are both sober now and things are slightly awkward.

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