The first date… those three words alone are enough to fill my soul with terror. The person likes you enough to go out with you, but did they just agree to be nice, or do they really like you? Do they mean to be friends? Have you just completely misjudged their advances? What if they act really overzealous? What if they act really uninterested?

It’s clear that there’s a lot to worry about when you meet up with somebody for the first time, so try to cross at least one thing off of the Worry List by having a low-stress meal. These five things are not the way to go for first date fare:

1. Mexican.
Refried beans are soooo delicious, yes, but the effects are musical, and you really don’t want that to happen at an inopportune time.

2. Sandwiches/burgers more than three inches thick.
Honestly, these are the most annoying things ever, and they will embarrass you when you least expect it. When you finally maneuver the thing so that it’s possible to put it in your mouth, everything inside it will inevitably spill out onto either your hands or your lap. (Editor’s Note: Sounds familiar to the bedroom festivities later. Ayoooo!) You can’t eat them with a knife and fork, either, for fear of looking like an extreme neatnik. Read More »

During my vegetarian kick this winter, I was determined to get enough protein and, ironically, fat in my diet. Cheese was good, milk was fine, and I cannot say enough about my obsession with avocado, but what I needed was something of the nut variety to add a little to my meals. Peanut butter was the obvious choice.

It’s cheap and easy. It’s pre-made. It’s delicious. But I can’t eat the Jifs or the Skippys. They’re too sweet, no matter how choosy my mom is. In actuality, because my mom is diabetic, she was the one who considered them too sweet, and so, by default, I went natural.

Initially I was a little repulsed, because the peanut oil settles on top of the mashed-up peanuts themselves and it requires stirring, but I soon got over this. Contrary to popular belief, I’m not (quite) that lazy. The good news is, if you are that lazy, you can buy pre-mixed natural peanut butter; I just prefer the Smuckers glass jars of it. Essentially, I go through about a jar of this stuff every ten days, and I think you get the idea of how much I love it. Before you judge me for eating it out of the far with a spoon, I am going to share with you the amazing and different ways to enjoy your PB au Natural: Read More »

Jared Fogle, the man responsible for selling millions upon millions of delicious Subway sandwiches, is known for becoming spokesperson for the company while still attending college in the late ’90’s.

What we didn’t know, was that Jared Fogle was not only infamous at his college for eating nothing but Subway and losing over 200 pounds, but also for being the go-to-guy for whenever college students wanted some good ol’ porn.

Best Week Ever has uncovered Jared’s dirty little secrets. While attending Indiana University, he ran a pretty successful pornography business straight from his own bedroom, and apparently had a “wide” variety of porn videos, which he only charged a dollar to rent. Get it? Wide! Read More »