David Duchovny has it. Halle Berry keeps getting involved with guys who have it. And you can supposedly add Michael Douglas, Lindsey Lohan, Britney Spears and a slew of other celebs to the list(s). But really, what is sex addiction, and do you or I have it?

Sex addiction is not about having a lot of sex or really, really enjoying it. Sex addiction is when someone’s sexual preoccupation causes their life to become unmanageable, demonstrated through a range of behaviors including pornography, voyeurism, masturbation and promiscuity. Over time, the behavior can become more intense as the addict’s need intensifies as they attempt to use sex to escape their problems.

In a case like Duchovny, whose addiction was to internet porn, simply having more sex with your partner will not satifsy the addiction. So much of the thrill and enjoyment lies in obtaining the sex and afterward, the addict often feels ashamed or embarrassed after the episode only to go on to repeat the behavior again and again because they cannot control their impulses.

Like drugs or alcohol, sex addiction dominates your life and is just as potentially destructive, as addicts may turn to prostitutes, go into tremendous debt, lose their jobs, put their health at risk and destroy relationships. It’s not a joke nor is it an excuse for infidelity.

If you’re curious and want to learn more or if you want to know where you stand, you can visit the sex addicts anonymous website or take the 45 questions assessment at sexhelp.com.

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People are always telling me that it is better to have loved and lost then never loved at all. And depending on the day, I tend to believe that.

That feeling of being in love is like nothing else; it is surreal, divine and really can’t be put into words. Being able to experience that – even if it ends badly – is totally worth it.

But the real question no one is asking is if it is better to have f*@#ed and lost than never to have f*@#ed at all.

I never really thought about it before, but my friend (and not the proverbial friend….really, a friend) is currently experiencing a long (looooooong) dry spell and is going absolutely crazy.

Having spent a good long year in a relationship filled with sex – sometimes 4 times a day – her current situation is hitting her hard making it nearly impossible to forget that delectable sextuation (get it? Sex +situation = sextuation!) she had before. Read More »