While Halloween now is more closely associated with finding a (slutty) costume and drinking Halloween inspired beverages, as a kid, there was nothing better than going door to door loading up on enough candy to last you till the 4th of July.Only problem is, my mom - the smart woman that she is - knew her life would be torturous through July if she let her three hyper children keep that much sugar around.

So every year, my two older brothers and I would have to dump all of our coveted, prized candy into the middle of the table. My mother then carefully separated the candy into piles - Milky Ways in one pile, Twix in another, Candy Corn in another, and so on. She then handed a bucket to each of us and, one by one, we would go around taking our pick and filling our buckets.

Once they were filled, the rest of the candy went to inner-city kids whose neighborhoods were too dangerous to trick-or-treat in (which now I see was a very noble thing but at the time I couldn’t understand why they deserved my candy gold. After all, I spent three long hours in the cold with clown makeup on my face, saying stupid poems at people’s doors while they filled my bag up with all that deliciousness). Read More »

Halloween used to be a holiday where people dressed up to spook others. Then it turned into a holiday where people dress up to f**k others.  And sometimes it’s a holiday where people dress up to honor others.
This year, why not do all three? Dress up as Sarah Palin!

She scares the crap out of me, my guy friends wanna f**k her, and, somehow, it’s an honor to dress up as this gun toting, beehive wearing, American Vice Presidential hopeful.

[Photo courtesy of Gawker.com]