I have never thought of myself as a “sorority girl.” Like many people, when I thought of the term “sorority girl” I didn’t have a whole lot of positive connotations. I thought they were fake, perky, skanky, High School queen bees, who did a lot of partying and a lot of drugs.

Okay, so I guess I let Hollywood feed me that stereotype.

However, once I started freshman year I started meeting some great girls (who were none of those stereotypical adjectives) and who were also in sororities. The contrast baffled me, so I decided to investigate.

Sororities are pretty big on my campus and something like 35% of girls go Greek. That fact and all the nice girls I had met led me to sign myself up for the 2 week long process of rush. My floor friends all signed up too, but I was still pretty iffy about the idea. I told a few home friends and their reaction was…well less than enthusiastic. I got responses like; “Are you serious?” “Why would you do that to yourself?” and “You are not a sorority girl!” Even my mom, who went Greek in college, said that it might not be for me. These people were the people that knew me best, so I thought that they were probably right, and I prepared to pull my name off the list of about 700 girls. Read More »

Do you know who Bruce Ivins is? Flashback to 2001, way too close to September 11th… remember the Anthrax scare that had this country freaking the f*ck out? Someone was mailing letters stuffed with actual anthrax to public figures, and not only were handlers of the letters getting sick, but people were actually dying from the shiz. Bruce Ivins, a 62-year-old Army biowarfare scientist who reportedly committed suicide Sunday, July 27th, was recently named by the FBI as the number one suspect of the Anthrax mailings.

So now that you know a little bit about Ivins, perhaps you’d be interested to find out that the man supposedly had a weird obsession with Princeton University’s Kappa Kappa Gamma sorority. Since the entire story is being heavily shrouded by the government (motivating some people to cry foul on Ivan’s link to the Anthrax letters), it’s not entirely clear how Ivins acted out his “obsession”, but a few reports indicate that Ivans was “rebuffed by a woman in the sorority” during his college days at Cincinnati University, and…I guess…never got over the burn? Read More »

We’ve all been there: the noisy hallmate, the rude hallmate, the one that leaves the bathroom messy or is playing loud music during exam week. But this past year all the forces of evil converged on one hall and ended up giving me the truly infernal hallmate experience. Read on, and pray you never have as bad luck as I did!

Things didn’t seem to be getting off on a good foot when I discovered myself and my boyfriend, also on the same hall, were completely surrounded by freshmen. We were juniors, with a buttload of junior independent work to get done in the course of the year, and we didn’t have as much patience for freshmen shenanigans as in the past. But still, we vowed to be good sports. The freshmen started things off with a bang by constantly converging in the hall right in front of my door to chatter loudly about inane subjects. On weekend nights, the music coming out of their rooms shook the floors, no matter how many times we asked them to turn it down.

The girls decided to label me as a spoil-sport because of this polite request, and insisted on giving me dirty looks in the bathroom. They continually stole the chalk from my chalkboard, left dirty dishes in the sink of the kitchen, and had atrocious hygiene when it came to disposing of sanitary items. That, however, was only the beginning. Read More »

Thanksgiving is a-comin’, ladies! Time for some turkey, stuffing (my absolute favorite treat on earth) and reuniting with all your old home friends. Oh, and hopefully a major shopping spree with mom. Is there any other reason to come home?

For those of you lucky ladies who are finally 21 (or those of you with a really good fake), Thanksgiving also means taking part in the biggest bar night of the year! I remember my first Wednesday-Before-Thanksgiving bar experience…at least until I blacked out due to the extreme levels of awkwardness and puked in my parents’ house.

Try explaining that one to dad when he finds you passed out next to the toilet the following morning.

Anyways, being that it is the biggest bar night of the year, there are so many things to know! And, being that I have been doing it for a little while now, I feel I am the perfect person to enlighten you on what to expect and how to deal.

What to Expect: Running into people you never liked and still don’t like.
How to Deal: I tend to hightail it to the bar, but if you don’t want to end up looking up at your dad from the tile floor the next morning, perhaps playing nice is a good idea. You know; pretend to care what they have to say, tell them how good they look and politely bow out when you (pretend to) see a friend across the room.

What to Expect: Saying the same things over (and over and over) again.
How to Deal: I recommend printing a t-shirt that includes the following information: what school you go to, what (if any) sorority you are in, and an acknowledgment to the fact that you gained/lost weight. When you realize that these are the topics discussed all freaking night long you will thank me. Read More »

Nerds and Sorority girls. They go together like a John Hughes movie and the 80’s.

Which is probably why Washington State’s Linux Users Group (the university’s largest computer club) has decided put out a memo to all the sororities on campus: “Make us over, and we’ll do your homework.”

In an effort to attract more women to the computer science program (and get a free haircut), the “nerds” of WSU’s Linux Club plan to host a “nerd auction”.

“You can buy a nerd and he’ll fix your computer”, their website explains, “help you with stats homework, or if you’re really adventurous, take you to dinner!”

But before the computer loving dudes go through with the auction, they’re looking for a few good sorority girls to make them more appealing.

“If anyone’s going to bid on us, we’ll need some spicing up. And who better to help with that than sorority girls who like nothing better than a makeover?”

While the whole “Beauty and the Greek” (sound familiar to anyone?) event is still in the planning stages, WSU’s computer program has garnered national attention because of it.

Will the idea bring more chicks into the lives of these self-described nerds? Of course!

Will the girls stick around? No f*cking way. Read More »

If I was still in college right now, I’d be peeing my pants with excitement over this awesome new development in alcoholism.

The Portopong!

Yes, yes, the summer is almost over (10 days and counting) but if you have access to a pool and a group of fun-loving friends, the Portopong is where it’s at. What college student doesn’t love a good game of pong? And in a pool no less? Yea, how about no less than amazing.

Just to make sure, we’re talking about this kind of pong, not this kind.

The Portopong is inflatable, which means you can squish it in your backpack and head over to the pool party after class. It comes with pool strings, patches for leaks and, if you buy one by tomorrow, it’s 40 bucks - 10 bucks off the normal price.

The only negative thing I can say about the Portopong is, if you’re gonna market to college students, find attractive people to sell your product. I think I see some man boobs. Read More »

The View has finally announced that Whoopi Goldberg will be joining the daily gab-fest.Goldberg is set to stat the day after Labor Day. And apparently, Barbara Walters is still looking for a 5th host (Hey Babs- I am totally available!)

I must say, the first fifteen minutes of The View is always entertaining. Watching “Hot Topics” is like fast-forwarding a scene at my sorority house kitchen table to twenty-five years from now. Gossiping about stars, shouting over each other to be heard and not really caring (or listening to) what the other girls at the table have to say. It is great to know not much will change in my life between now and the year 2030 (and thanks to Botox, really, nothing will change!) Read More »

I’ve been home from college for what? Two months? And already, my parents are worried I am going to become an old maid, living with them for - gasp! - the rest of eternity. So what if I’m more into yoga than Jaeger bombs? I enjoy the time I spend in bed napping, DVD watching, and blogging for all of you about how I’ve turned into a grandma at the age of twenty-two. My parents (and now my whole surrounding world of people), however, will have none of that.

Aren’t parents supposed to be the ones who are against going out to the bar? I guess in that respect my ‘rents are so not 1969. But their dating tactics? Well, it’s more old school than any of my kick-ass, super-soft vintage T’s (and I have some verrrry old ones).

My parents met in the 70’s when they were set up on a blind date. Therefore, they think that I should be set up on as many blind dates as possible. Lovelyyyy. Read More »

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• Perez challenges Gummi Bear Davis to a duel.

• Duke University hates your iPhone.

• Every Sorority has that one fat guy.