Elizabeth Hasselbeck had to eat her McCain/Palin words.

Pretty soon, AT&T will own damn near everything, including your soul.

Military uniforms make great women’s fashion for the fall.

Ever thought Barack, Michelle, Sarah, and John would appear on TV together? Well, South Park got them together in a jewelry heist.

Boy bands are all the rage and ‘NSYNC’s Lance Bass wants in on the action.

Having lots of sex? You may need this.

California has disappointed most, especially Ellen.

Want to sing in the rain? This umbrella has you rockin’.

Sexy Scarlett Johansson to wed? Perhaps!

Obviously, there aren’t enough celebrity gossip sites on the Internet, and obviously, Ashton Kutcher is the guy everyone thinks of when they think “celebreality comedy gold”, so of course Kutcher and his production company (Katalyst Media) would put out a blog / website hybrid dedicated to making fun of Hollywood culture — as well as all girls everywhere.

Blahgirls is Kutcher and Co’s website; which so far includes a blog with random celebrity pictures and funny captions, as well as two animated shorts featuring the 3 “Blah Girls”; Britney, Krystle, and Tiffany.  There’s also some guy named Stewart, who’s like, totally gay and totally into celebrity culture, bitch!

Besides being not funny AT ALL, the Blahgirls webisodes are hard to understand.  What the hell is Kutcher and his team trying to lambast?  Old celeb gossip?  Gay men who talk with a lisp? Or stupid women who are so annoying and stupid all they do is care about celebrity gossip?

While I’m sure (at least I’m hope I’m sure) Ashton doesn’t think all women are stupid and annoying, his BlahGirls are in no way funny or timely enough to satirize anything, so all they end up doing is asserting stereotypes.  Why anyone would bookmark this website is beyond me, and it’s also beyond me why anyone would think to build it.  There’s nothing new here, Ashton.  Aren’t you like..26 years old?  How are you so behind the times? Read More »

My TV watching habits are pretty well documented. You guys know that I watch at least two (pretty bad) reality shows and that I never got into “Sex and the City.” But I do like good shows with real writing, like “Lost”, “South Park” and “The Daily Show.”

Do I have any right to declare that a show is so terrible that even I cannot watch it? I think so. I mean, I’ve seen episodes of “Ice Road Truckers.” Freaking “Ice Road Truckers.” I am aware that I watch crap.

And given that love for crap TV, it might surprise you to learn that I never watched “A Shot at Love” when it was on MTV. For real. It was too fake for me and I never thought that a show would come along that was too sh*tty and fake for me. I mean, this is ME.

Now enter “That’s Amore.” Read More »

• Apparently, the kids are calling it “juking” these days. But back when I was in high school it was just called acting real slutty and awkward. (Chicago Sun-Times)

• Students could learn a lot from this kind of dedication. Minus the dying. (Yahoo News)

• Jack Hanna and a flamingo got stuck in a turnstile. For real. (Associated Press)

• I don’t think South Park or Family Guy would think this comic was all that funny either. (WTNH)

• Cosmopolitan Magazine and its evolution over the past thirty years! Prepare to feel stunned and better looking than the cover model from 1987. (Jezebel)

• Oh Mary Kate Olsen, if there’s one thing I didn’t want today, it was a visual in my head of you running around naked wearing only jewelry. Real visual? Maybe. (People Magazine)

• Am I crazy or have I been seeing satin shorts in Forever 21 for at least a year? Take that Vera Wang. (FashionchickNYC)

• So now all the smug vegans can drive around in their hybrids feeling smug for yet another reason! Good for them! (Yahoo News)

• “People would walk past the serious work I was doing as a painter and want to see the Etch-A-Sketches.” Ummm…Etch-A-Sketch is serious work. (UK DailyMail)

• If you’re unhappy you get more ice cream! But then what if you’re happy and don’t get as much…doesn’t this make you unhappy? Yes it does. Genius! (wemakemoneynotart.com)