August 1st. Can you believe it? Where has time gone?

Perhaps it’s time to stop blacking out/macking on totally unavailable men and start enjoying the summer days. Although, with all the crazy sh*t that went down this week (earthquakes? lumps? embarassing doctor’s appointments?) can you blame me?

Alcohol seems to be the best (and only) remedy for forgetting things I wish I never saw, getting over the fact that he didn’t call and, of course, my growing credit card bill. (I guess I should be glad I didn’t fork over the cash for that cosmetic surgery.)

Usually I would turn to music to get me through the tough times, but even that has been ruined for me.

With only 4 weeks left of summer, I better get crackin’ on finding a summer fling. It has been far too long since anyone has parked their beef bus in my tuna town. Yeah, I said it. I guess that’s what the weekend is for. Well, that and movie marathons.

Let’s face it, when you’re a college chic on a budget it’s hard enough to afford the actual fashion and celeb magazines (what are they these days $4.95?), let alone the glorious, “I will be poor for the rest of my life if I actually buy that” fashions that are inside.

It’s like that boy you love that you know has a girlfriend and yet you flirt with him anyways…a major tease that you knowingly setting yourself up for disappointment only to be left without the boy (or in this case, Jimmy Choo’s).

So what’s a girl on a major budget to do (aside from salivating all over this month’s Vogue)?

Consider me your new best friend (or personal shopper). Your own Rachel Zoe, if you will. Each week, I’ll take a new celeb or couture look and do all the leg work for you. I’ll find a similar style on a real girl’s budget. Now all you have to do is order it, throw it on and go.

This Week: Jessica Simpson’s Red Wrap Dress

Red Wrap Dress from Victoria’s Secret. A wrap dress is such a great wardrobe staple. This one is a little bit of a longer sleeve than the one Jessica is wearing, which is a great piece to take you from summer to fall. Wear it now with a wedge and in October with tights and a great boot… and if red isn’t your color, it comes in Black and Blue too! Read More »

Got 10 minutes? Got 13 bucks? Got frickin’ tastebuds?!

Then, boy, have I got the dessert for you.

Seriously. It’s called Mint Chip Pie and the only downside (the ONLY downside) is how retardedly addictive it is.

So take ten minutes and make this delicious summer dessert. It’s about 5 servings, so invite some friends over…or don’t and have lots of leftovers. Your choice. I won’t tell.

And now, without further ado, I give you:

Mint Chip Pie Read More »

When one of my friends gets a new boyfriend, I either hear an “Oh, we’re going to be together forever” speech or an “I don’t think I like him that much, we’ll probably break up soon” comment. I’ve always thought of myself as falling in the middle of these two categories, but an argument with my boyfriend made me think of how long I thought we could really go.

Even though it’s still the summer, my best friends and I have started talk of what to do for spring break. We were thinking of more people to invite and I brought the request up to my current boyfriend.

“If we’re still together by March, would you want to come to Mexico with us?” I asked.

“What do you mean ‘if’?” he replied. “Are you saying you think we’ll break up in the next few months?”

This exchange of words was followed by a rather long argument in which he thought I was being mean and I thought he was being unreasonable. I mean, if you’ve only been going out for 5 months, how far in advance should you really plan? Don’t get me wrong, I’ve planned parts of relationships before but they’ve never quite turned out the way I wanted. Read More »

As we approach August, we may have started to take summer vacay for granted. In the dog days of summer, it’s easy to sleep until 2 p.m., get caught up on Maury, and not realize we still have our PJs on until it’s time to go back to bed. But with the countdown to Fall Semester ticking fast, it’s important to make the most of every spare minute. Whether you’re working your ass off or dedicated to being a lazy bum until a full courseload kicks back in, it’s time to get in gear and create some glorious summer memories.

1. Take a roadtrip. Sure, gas prices are skyrocketing, but you’re only young once, right? And once you’re shackled into a nine-to-five, you’re going to crave the spontaneity that’s currently yours for the taking. I’m a self-professed workaholic, but even I’ve been known to squeeze in a few quality roadtrips between May and August each year. One summer, I took a fourteen-hour drive to Ohio with two girls from work I barely knew, for the birthday party of one of my brother’s grad school friends. And no, my brother didn’t go. So, three random girls showed up at a party in the boondocks (aka Wooster), and promptly put on our party shoes. Liquor flowed, regrettable hook-ups were had, and the girls and I totally bonded over the experience. Even if you can only spare one day, find a town you’ve never been to before, and head out to explore. You never know what adventures might arise. Read More »

T.G.I.F.

Remember when that meant a night of Full House and Family Matters? Now it just means a night of heavy drinking followed by a day of serious sleeping. And I still love it just as much.

This week was a long one. We lost Estelle Getty. Our boyfriend, Christian Bale, was arrested for yelling at his mother. And we found out that all the not-so-hard work we are putting into college isn’t worth crap anymore. Awesome.

But even though another week has passed, crazy girls are still around, we are still too picky when it comes to picking boys, and freaky guys are still all about peeing on us in bed. WTF?

Maybe we should stick to being single? It is far too hard to find a tall guy anyway. And getting into a relationship only means adding another ex to the list…who you will never be able to avoid thanks to our generation’s problem with oversharing.

Ugh. I need a shot.

At least boys are starting to appreciate more comfortable undies. I’ll keep that thought close to my heart as I enjoy yet another awesome summer weekend.

You know how it feels really sexy and naughty when you sidle up to a cute bartender and order a Sex on the Beach?

Well, it does.
It feels sexy and naughty.

Anyway, you can recreate that feeling when you throw your own sexy party and act as bartender.

Here are a few sexy-sounding drinks to serve to your hottie brigade of guests. Make sure to giggle annoyingly when they order.

Orgasm
1/2 ounce Vodka
1/2 ounce Amaretto
1/2 ounce White Creme de Cacao
1/2 ounce Triple Sec
1 ounce cream
Shake with ice and enjoy.

Tap That Ass
2 ounces Alizé (1 ounce red, 1 ounce yellow)
1 ounce Hennessy
a little cranberry juice
a little soda water
Pour the Alizé and Hennessy over ice. Top it off with the cranberry juice and soda water to taste. Read More »

Nothing says summertime like copious sunburns, drinking outside and picnics. You could be “that girl” and bring coleslaw, hot dog buns or worse…the dreaded bag of chips, to your next backyard bash, or you could wow the hell out of your friends and bring the best damn fruit salad they’ve ever had.

Now don’t get ahead of yourself. Fruit salad is not for the faint of heart. It can be time-consuming and expensive if you don’t plan it out just right. Here are a few tips for making this healthy, fun summer treat.

1. Use fresh fruit. This should go without saying but I’m saying it anyway. Frozen fruit is for smoothies, margaritas and ice packs..not salad.

2. Search for bargains. To make a good salad you could be buying 8-10 types of fresh fruit. The price tag can get pretty high if you don’t shop around. Try to buy at least half of your fruit on sale. This isn’t tough to do in the summer with so much fresh stuff in season. Because you’ll be cutting and chopping you can also take “scratch and dent” fruit (the stuff with small bruises). Read More »