[Every week our style guru takes a celebrity look and breaks it down for you, our poor college fashionista. What does that mean? It means that while the celebrities are spending $5,000 on an ensemble, you don’t have to.

All you have to do is click on the goods and - boom - you can buy the entire ensemble. Yes, we know; there is a spot for her in heaven.]

Lately, Katie holmes style has been reminding me of a mixture between my brothers and my mom…circa 1992. Baggie Jeans, a mom haircut - I’m sort of on the fence about it all. And by on the fence, I obviously mean never buying into the trend. Ever.

But, every now and again, I find myself loving a piece of hers, writing it off as “in my dreams,” or “when I win the lottery.” Between her paychecks from Dawson’s Creek syndication and her husband being - um - Tom Cruise, the girl has a budget of Loubitons and lavish meals, whereas I am stuck with Target finds and Ramen Noodles.

That is, until People.com revealed this jacket is only $75.00. Yes, you read that right. SEVENTY FIVE! This little slice of info made my weekly Celebrity Chic on the Cheap more like Celebrity’s Cheap and Chic finds, giving yours truly some extra time to sleep in this Thanksgiving Weekend.

So I bring you this weeks’ Celebrity Chic on the Cheap: Katie Holmes’ Mom Haircut leads her to Mom Website, Leads her to Fabulous Find. Read More »

It might go against Scientology to record my thoughts but my thetan level is low enough that it might not matter until later, when I may become a master of the universe. I have to guess what the levels are called since Tom says that I’m not high enough in the order yet to know - much of anything.

While he is spending his time channeling L. Ron, I have tried to find the meaning of life in the temple of Barney’s. Did I say that? Because I didn’t mean it, in case you’re reading this my Scientology handlers. I meant that I just enjoy shopping. Because my life is so empty. By empty I mean FULL, though, it’s full of - shopping bags and hair cuts and love for L. Ron.

As first lady of Scientology, I must hold it together at all times  and no one knows the pressure that I’m under. Not only am I a fashion icon, I am an important actress and a vessel for scientology’s future. Even if I don’t have sex with Tom.

I must stop writing now. Tom is calling me and it’s time for my auditing, to free myself from the traumatic incidents of my life. Like my marriage. He worries when I start thinking or having friends, even ones as vapid as Posh.

Vapid. I love that word. I used words like that when I was living in Capeside. Oh, how I miss Dawson. He always knew me better than anyone else. I don’t wanna wait for my life to be over, I want to know right now what will it be… Dawson, I’ll leave my window open for you - please come.

Oh, no, Tom’s here. American Express, take me away…

Katie Holmes seems to spend her life in a constant state of grim understanding: she’s married to Tom Cruise whether she likes it or not, Tom Cruise is weird and removed from reality, Tom Cruise does not want her to be more famous than him so he uses his Scientology mind powers to render everything she touches unsuccessful, Tom Cruise’s first batch of kids look to her for help because their adoptive dad has completely forgotten about them, and the Paparazzi will never let her go because they’re just waiting for the day when she falls to the ground, pounds the pavement with her fists, and tells the world she just can”t take it anymore.

You know how I know Katie Holmes lives with these thoughts everday? Because of her face. The girl don’t.ever.smile anymore. Let’s go on a photo journey to exemplify this:

Is she smiling? No. Read More »

Everyone and their mother was out Thursday night for the arrival of Victoria and David Beckham at the Los Angels International Airport. Cameras were flashing, people were screaming, Victoria was wearing something tight and black…a repeat of every other time this family has been photographed.

What I don’t understand is why CNN felt the need to cover it.

Much like the Paris Hilton overload, I can’t quite understand why we’re all so interested in this family. Sure, David Beckham is a great soccer player, who also happens to be hot. And his wife likes to shop. And wear outfits that push her boobs up to her chin. But other than that, are they interesting? Read More »

I’m not sure we need any more signs that Tom Cruise is officially off his rocker, but when I read this little tidbit, I had to pass it on. I don’t want to hate on Scientologists, but… alien souls in my being? Really? Tom Cruise going from hot fighter pilot to crazy tabloid staple? Something is certainly wrong here. And why, oh why give the crazy bug to baby Suri? This girl is going to have enough issues to begin with….

Turns out little baby Suri already has a weekly hair appointment. Now, maybe I’m just jealous since I can’t do this and have horrible roots down to my ears, but—she can’t have that much hair! I think it’s a toupee. Even stranger, says the tipster, is the fact that she is always naked and no one is allowed to speak in her presence.

Holy crazy people, Batman!

Read full story (and other interesting celeb goss) here.