Late Night Binge

You woke up early to work
out before class. After an hour
on the elliptical and thirty minutes
in the weight room (20 of which
were spent staring at the dudes at
the bench press), you head home to
get ready for your day. You shower,
throw on a pair of jeans, and grab a
yogurt and some fruit on the way
out the door.
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Hello, My Name is Cutout Dissection.com (For Real)

cutoutdissection_com_license.pngDo you volunteer your time for your favorite cause? Volunteer to work on the presidential campaign? Pass out pamphlets for women’s rights? Throw paint on people sporting fur coats?

I know I do some of those things. I am a huge supporter of animals’ rights, but even I think that PETA is a bit extreme when it comes to getting their point across. And it appears that some of their members are taking that extremism even further.

PETA intern, Jennifer Thornburg, Cutout Dissection.com convinced federal courts to change her name to support Cut Out Dissection Month in October.

Now, I don’t know if it’s fame, pure insanity, or a real dedication to the cause, but this girl is making a bold statement. This is originality and creativity at its finest. All in the “name” of community service!

So why did this 19 year old intern do this? She wanted to raise awareness about the six million animals that are killed for dissection each year. The animals suffer painful deaths. She hopes to raise awareness amongst students and teachers to say no to dissection, and yes to alternative ways of anatomy.

Around PETA and to her fellow interns, she is known as simply Cut Out, but her parents still call her Jenny. She loves introducing herself as Cutout Dissection.com because it engages people in conversation about dissection efforts, thus leading to ways they can get involved and help the cause.

Although, I can’t help but wonder what strangers think when she introduces herself at the bar:

“Hey, pretty lady. I’m Jon.”
“Hi Jon. I’m Cutout Dissection.com.”
“What?”

Tell me what do you think: is this amazing dedication or just plain crazy?

They Say Your Twenties Are The Hardest…

Remember when we were in high school and our teachers and parents told us that we’d better get ready for the ‘real world’? Maybe you didn’t hear these words of advice (which always seemed more like a threat) as much as I did, but I know I wasn’t the only one out there being warned of how hard my twenties would be. Across the board, particularly from older friends, I kept hearing horror story after horror story about the ‘terrible 20’s’.

But you know what?  I disagree with those stories.

I think life is what you make it. I think that if you want to be happy, you will find a way to be happy. I think that if you’re meant to be in college, you will study hard and learn and enjoy it along the way.

I’m 24 and my twenties have been my favorite part of my life so far. Granted, I’m constantly trying to have the best time of my life, so I’ll probably be bouncing off the same sentiments when I’m 40, too…but what’s wrong with that? Read More »

Hey Parents: Teachers Are On the Internet. Get Over It

chrishanson.jpgRemember when you were in High School and you saw your teacher in the supermarket, buying milk or some crap, and it was all “Ms. Jones, you drink milk!??

Suddenly in the dairy aisle you had the realization that teachers are people and all of sudden you stopped being such a godd*mn prick in your classes.

These days, it seems that there is equal amount of shock when teachers, GASP, use the Internet. Now I know most students probably already realize teachers use the net tubes to do research or write on the library message board, but what about when you find them on Facebook or Myspace? Should they even be allowed? I mean seriously, isn’t that where kids openly talk about their debauchery and then get all ‘you read my diary!’ when they get grounded for the pictures they posted of them doing shots of Jameson with underwear on their head?

Apparently, yes, and ALSO, according to people in Missouri, Facebook and Myspace are directly related to teacher/student sexual relationships. Genius.

In Missouri in particular, a rash of student-teacher sexual relationships have spawned crackdowns on social-networking friendships. Web site badbadteacher.com, which keeps track of teachers disciplined, arrested and convicted of inappropriate behavior with students, lists 11 such teachers from Missouri within the last two years.

Which is why state legislator Jane Cunningham is sponsoring a bill in the Missouri House of Representatives that would ban elementary school teachers from having social-networking friendships with their students. (Cnn.com)

Here are some tips for parents who think Facebook and Myspace are responsible for teacher/student sexual relationships. Read More »

Blast To The (sort of) Past: Visiting My Old High School

HighSchoolI know people who look back at high school and wish they could go back. I know people who want to leave it in the past and never look back. And I know people who could really care less either way. I don’t really know where I fit in that, but I know that my high school – the second one, since I transferred halfway through – and a few of the teachers had enough of an impact in my life that I feel like I at least owed them a visit. So I did.

Now, let me explain something real quick to you guys; teenagers scare the living shit out of me. No, really, they do. After being teased and taunted for years, a group of teenagers giggling and laughing anywhere near me automatically puts me on edge. But I was willing to walk through the halls infested with these loud cockroaches to see my old teachers.

I went to a school with a mild crime problem, so of course there was a security van parked in front. When I passed by, the guy honked at me, and I groaned to myself. I really didn’t feel like dealing with security, but I turned and went over to the car. Turns out it was one of my favorite guards, and he greeted me pretty happily before I went in.

I made the rounds to my favorite teachers. Two of them – two of the most important to me – weren’t there, so the chances that I’ll go back to see them before the year is up are pretty high. I was surprised how everyone remembered me so well. Probably the funniest reoccurring question was, “Are you seriously a senior?” Three years didn’t really seem like a lot, but it was. The auditorium and the music wing were both redone, and all of the kids had LAPTOPS. At the risk of sounding like an old grump, when I went to school, we didn’t get laptops. We had to crowd around one of the four computers in the room and share. Dang nabbit. Read More »

Teachers Pull Guns on 6th Grade Class!

Class Trip in Tennessee

I understand that school systems all over the country are trying to fight back, but this could be a little overboard.

There used to be a point where teachers were a source of knowledge and wisdom that transcended their role of disciplinarian. Now, teachers are more sex crazed and mentally unbalanced than half the students out there!

In case you haven’t heard, in Murfreesboro, TN, a group of teachers turned an elementary school class trip into an episode of 24. These models for academia, yelled out to the scared 6th grade children, that this was not a test, and that they need to hide under anything they could find. Furthermore, these teachers never even informed any parents or chaperones of their planned festivities. To add the realistic allure of the shake-down, 2 teachers branded real unloaded handguns. Luckily, the Assistant Principal was in on it and thought it would be a learning experience.

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