A newly-decorated dorm wall–for cheap!

Alright girls, it’s now officially Back To School Season. Does the thought of dorm décor make you sweat worse than the Summer heat? Do the prices in the PB Teen catalog make you woozy? Fear not, because Sarah is here to make it all better. I went to boarding school, so I’ve got double the dorm years under my belt—that means I’ve got double the tips, tricks and shortcuts to transform your dorm from cinderblock cell to palatial pad (without spending your Summer savings). So put away the lava lamps and movie posters, and let Sarah be your guide.

We all know that those PB Teen and Teen Vogue “dorm makeovers” are a sham. Why? Well, for starters no college student can afford a $200 duvet cover or a $50 pillow. We’re lucky if we can afford to eat lunch. And second—I don’t know what college these kids are going to, but at my lovely institution there is no way in hell we could ever paint the walls, swap out the furniture or even put nails in the wall (have you ever tried to hammer nails into cinder block? Not. Fun.) Read More »

We all have our weird habits. And we have all learned throughout our lives that it is best to keep those things hidden. I mean, no one needs to know that I end an evening at the bar with a 100 Calorie pack and a jar of peanut butter.

We were discussing these things the other day - our guilty pleasures - and wondered if we were the only ones who had em. I can’t possibly be the only person out there who dances around to Britney Spears in my underwear, right? Right?

In an effort to make ourselves feel better (or less weird), we asked our writers this week to share their guilty pleasures. The good news is: ours aren’t nearly as embarassing as we thought.

Kathryn S: The most dirty, vulgar songs ever recorded. I love listening to my “Perv Mix” on my ipod at that the gym: the little old ladies on the treadmill next to me have no idea that I’m listening to Blink 182’s “F*** a Dog” or Liz Phair’s “Hot White C*m.”

K - NYU: Singing in my car. Back in the glory days when I had a car and lived in a real place instead of Manhattan. “Invisible Touch” by Phil Collins is wayyyy up there, as well as “Escape” by Enrique Iglesias. Read More »

[Yes, LC, we realize this Hills update is late. No need to make that “holding corn chips incredulously” move of yours. This week sucked for your dear editor. I apologize. Now, on to the awesomeness…]

Yesterday I had a serious case of the Mondays. Even the Boston Creme donut I had didn’t make me feel any better. Or the giant sale on Bloomingdales.com (but I may not feel the good vibes from that until my brand new jacket arrives in the mail!). I was ready to retire to bed with a cup of tea and a good book until I remembered something awesome: The Hills is back. I have gotten so used to Mondays without my blonde and super tan frenemies that I nearly forgot. I turned on the TV and was blessed with even more good news: TWO EPISODES!

It was like the clouds parted and the sun began to shine.

Two full episodes means there is a lot of ground to cover. I took three pages of notes! Sure, a lot of that includes, “What the hell is Stephanie wearing on her head?” and, “Heidi looks like she wants to cry right now – she is trying so hard – but her face just…won’t….move.” But so much happened!

There is no way I can really discuss everything I want to – like Heidi and Spencer’s fight over who paid for which super-sized flat screen - so here is a brief rundown of the happenings on episodes dos and tres of The Hills. Sort of a Cliff’s Notes guide to last night’s drama.

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Considering that every episode of The Hills includes Heidi drinking at some Hollywood hot-spot, it came as quite a surprise to me to find out she wasn’t yet 21. But, alas, last night was the big two-one for Ms. Montag. And what did she do to celebrate the big event? Why, spend the evening with the one and only person in California that is still speaking to her: Spencer.

I can’t imagine a worse way to spend my birthday – besides the ridiculously sexy Chanel bag, of course – than dining with Spencer Pratt while he plays with his iPhone in a hideous dress that makes me resemble the left-overs of the entire meal my anorexic body couldn’t handle. But who am I to judge? To each their own.

It is not like Heidi had a choice; even if she were still friends with Lauren (or anyone, for that matter) she would not have been able to celebrate with Heidi because everyone who was anyone was at the Young Hollywood party. Which, by the way, LC and Whitney rocked. Way to handle a large group of obscure young “celebrities” and Hilary Duff, ladies! Read More »

I hate Heidi. Everything about her from her fake face/boobs to her super shiny and bouncy blonde hair. Oh, and her giant teeth.

Yet even I, president of the I Hate Heidi and Fake Face/Boobs and Super Shiny and Bouncy Blonde Hair and Big Teeth club feel drawn to her this week. There is something about the sheer douchiness of Spencer that makes Heidi look, well, good.

Last night’s episode of The Hills made Heidi look like an actual responsible and semi-intelligent adult. For the first time in our long and tumultuous history, Heidi actually seemed to be taking her job seriously.

No more “I wanna get paid for doing nothing.” The Future Mrs. Pratt is actually putting her personal life on hold for the sake of her serious new position. And I can’t help but respect that. I also can’t help but notice that she is working longer hours than me. And that makes me feel like less of a person.

What happened to old Heidi? You know, skip out on work to get lunch Heidi. Or drop out of fashion school after one day Heidi. I know one person who misses her: Whiny, Bitchy Spencer. (Sidenote: I kinda miss her too. She is so much more fun when you can really hate her.) Read More »

MTV has gone above and beyond lame by giving Lauren Conrad her own fashion line—and making it expensive as hell.

The annoying blond from The Hills (doesn’t narrow it down at all, does it?) has been an intern at Teen Vogue for a while, and I guess after two years of licking envelopes and putting dresses back on hangers, MTV decided she had enough training to put out her own line of boring, expensive crap.

Looking like stuff you could pick up at Forever 21 or H&M for $20, Conrad’s designs (named after herself. How imaginative) range from an $85 to $150 dollars, totally slamming the door on any of her teenage fans who don’t have their parents credit card handy.

After clicking through the small array of rayon shirts and dresses (and a headscarf that costs $25.00), I can’t decide which pisses me off more; the fact that MTV has become so obsessed with money that it no longer applies to normal people, or the fact that girls will actually buy expensive stuff designed by a chick who has no official training whatsoever.

All I’m saying is, if I’m going to buy something that’s almost 90% rayon, I’ll push past the 10-year-olds to the Wet Seal at my neighborhood mall.

Check out the entire Lauren Conrad Collection after the jump! Read More »

It finally happened.

After months of waiting – and an amazingly saucy lesbian version of Engaged and Underage – season three of The Hills finally premiered. I had no doubts that the show was going to be top notch, but after watching such a ridiculous ep of Engaged and Underage (full of lesbian fights, make out scenes and a whole lotta white dresses), I really didn’t know if my show could live up to all of my original expectations.

Well, my friends, did it ever!

Let the recap begin! And there is no better place to star than at the beginning.

Like with Whitney (shockingly!!!) getting a full time job at Teen Vogue. Oh, and LC returning for her third consecutive year as an intern…because everyone gets a three year internship! I mean, one semester isn’t standard or anything. All huge fashion mags invite their not-famous-at-all interns back for a few more years. Read More »

As any child of the 70’s, 80’s, and 90’s knows, these days, MTV is a virtual wasteland. A repetitious, celebrity obsessed, materialistic channel that now seems to hire VJ’s based on their height and weight rather than their music expertise. My Super Sweet Sixteen makes any girl who had less than 1500 people and 17 white ponies at her birthday feel like she was cheated, and if you happen to be out of high school, there’s almost nothing—with the exception of True Life—that deals with your issues.

And I don’t have to even get into the music video problem. Or the fact that the channel’s completely lost its bite. The argument is old. Everyone knows MTV has sold out to big business and bling.

The show that highlights everything wrong with what was once our beloved edgy escape? The Hills.

This show is trash. Pure garbage. White 20-somethings bitching and whining that their deep pockets aren’t deep enough and their amazing jobs aren’t amazing enough. Bleach blond, breast-implanted bimbos who aren’t doing a thing to make this world a better place. Interning at Teen Vogue and working the door at some Hollywood club? This is supposed to drama? This is supposed to interesting? This is supposed to be camera worthy? Read More »