I am sorry.

As it seems, I am currently suffering from a WICKED case of PMS. I have never really fallen victim to this monthly debacle, but in the last 24 hours I have felt overwhelmingly compelled to freak out on nearly everyone I have come into contact with, and, well, have.

For that, I’d like to make amends.

My dear, sweet boyfriend:
Sorry for freaking out on you after you felt compelled to repeat - verbatim - nearly the entire dialog from “Tropic Thunder.” I know you enjoyed the movie, and in a sick way enjoyed how irritated it made me for you to continue doing it, but that was no excuse to smack you on the arm with the blunt force of a car crash then scream at you like a fire-breathing dragon. It was mortifying to see you look so terrified of me.

Waitress at the Goose:
I understand how it can be working in food service; I have been there too, sister. With that in mind, I am sorry for being a total bitch after finding out we were merely 4 minutes late to order food last night. Sure, my eye rolling and walking out of the restaurant without a comment to you was rude, but, in my defense, I had just spent 2 hours watching “Tropic Thunder” and was famished. If I didn’t eat something soon, I was going to lose it and my poor boyfriend was going to be my target practice. I’m sorry for being so rude. In hindsight hanging around, having a few pitchers and enjoying the quick buzz may have been exactly what I needed. Read More »

Summer is not coming to a close! Do not listen to your television blaring “back to school” commercials at you! Keep on loving the sun and living the summertime life. Here are my five favorite things about summer - the good, the bad and the sweaty.

1. Venti Starbucks Iced Passion Tea Lemonade (with two pumps of melon):
If you haven’t tried this drink, walk… no, RUN, to your nearest Starbucks. Don’t worry; if you live in America it will probably be no further than a block away. This drink is the greatest non alcoholic summer beverage I’ve consumed. I’ve even attempted to make it the greatest alcoholic beverage I’ve consumed. Do not mix with vodka! Not good. Anyway, it’s sweet, tangy, caffeine free and most importantly, it’s pink.

The bad?: Friends mock you for embarrassingly long and girly drink order and local Starbucks staff start knowing you as “Two Pump Melon Girl.”

2. Rainbow flip flops
Obvious summertime staple! These go with everything and flip flops are the only shoe of choice for the summer. I have a beach pair, which are completely destroyed and a nice pair, which are on their way to being completely destroyed. Can wear these to class, bars and the gym. But only to the gym if you plan on just walking around observing, in lieu of legit exercise. My kind of gym shoes! Read More »

Live from prison, it’s the Dark Knight!

LOL, Jessica Simpson wants to be a singer!…Wait, but, um, isn’t she?

Speidiwood: punishing the troops, one Iraq trip at a time

Oh, she’s just being Lindsay–I mean Miley–I mean…THEY’RE THE SAME!?!

Remember when Dina Lohan won an award for motherhood?

In other news, this 12-year-old makes me feel really bad about myself

I don’t know if this is better or worse than a tequilla shot

I. Hate. Happy. Couples. Even if they’re dirty hipsters.

It takes a certain type of person to fight at a Waffle House–and his name is Kid Rock

Wendy Williams vs. Omarosa: fight to the death. No, really, please?

“The Dark Knight” is upon us! WHO ELSE IS FREAKING OUT?!

Keeping up with the Kardashians…in jail

Sarah and Jimmy split–the Matt Damon video is just awkward now

It’s not the happy ending most girls grow up dreaming about…

“Hey, um, Papa Hulk…were your girlfriend and I separated at birth?”

I don’t know if Hitch would have prescribed an “open relationship”

The new power jobs are in–”socialite” ain’t one of ‘em, Paris!

Off-topic, but I think Jeff Goldblum is really sexy

Radiohead’s new music video is awesome. ‘Nough said.

18-year-old waitress hooks up with a Rolling Stone–and it’s not even Mick or Keith!

[Photo courtesy of Mollygood.com]

Has Lindsay Lohan turned Miley Cyrus into a promiscuous devil child?

Perez 1, McCain, 0

Those Real World kids continue to make our generation look like idiot douchebags

Early reviews of Heath Ledger in The Dark Knight: Fabulous and Frightening

What if dudes didn’t exist?

A cross wearing Bible-thumper…dealbreaker?

Jay-Z likes his watermelons to look like Beyonce’s …well…melons

I will never put my dog on Prozac. End of story

Sleeping around via Cragislist

Dear New Yorker: That cover was stupid. Just admit it

Hottie of the Week
I can’t believe that I’m going to say this – but if you forget the infidelity and the fact that he probably gets his hair Japanese straightened, Mario Lopez has a smokin’ body.

Song of the week
Katy Perry, “I Kissed a Girl”.
I hate this song.

Freak Show
Verne Troyer/Mini-Me sex tape. Why don’t they just pour acid on our eyes?

Am I the only one who thinks that Jennifer Lopez would be absolutely frightening if you pissed her off even just a tiny bit? FYI, you may get the store discount if you ask nicely and don’t have your bodyguard show a gun to the shop girl. Read More »

“The Dark Knight” is already my favorite movie ever

I get “blackout” to level the gender playing fields

This guy is truly the voice of a generation

Tom Hanks is a celeb endorsement I’d trust

Isn’t bird poo on your face normally a bad thing?

Jason Mraz, I love your words–but are they yours?

Admirable: Britney Spears stays grounded…even in flight!

Yay, Seth MacFarlane is stickin’ around

Planning a wedding is no easy task

Another “The Hills” parody–this time, with Lo!

The body of Heath Ledger was found today in his Soho home.

From TMZ.com “He was found dead in his bed in one of his residences in Soho by his housekeeper…Law enforcement sources tell TMZ they believe it was not a crime.”

While the official details are yet to be released, it is suspected that he died from a drug overdose. The New York Times is reporting that Heath’s housekeeper and masseuse found the actor a little after 3 pm today, unconscious, with pills nearby.

Heath’s newest movie, The Dark Knight, was scheduled for a May release.