Though we’ve been led to believe otherwise by movies and dramatic episodes of Dawson’s Creek, let’s face it—sex can be awkward.

Instead of perfect lighting that makes you look hotter than Heidi Klum, you have your date’s lava lamp casting a faint glow on your cellulite. You don’t always fall effortlessly into bed, your bodies completely in sync. Sometimes you have to move your cat, half-eaten can of Pringles, and dog-eared copy of “He’s Just Not That Into You” out of the way first.

Passionate tearing off of clothing? Sure, sometimes.

But then there are those times where he’s fumbling with your bra clasp for so long that you don’t even help him because you’re curious to see how long it’ll take. Read More »

The alarm screams at 7:54 AM, tearing me out of dream in which I was awkwardly going back to my high school prom.

I am already not a fan of this day.

I do my best to get up and into the shower without falling asleep and slamming my head against the tile wall. Running downstairs, gulping a few spoonfuls of cereal and grabbing my keys, I
make it out the door just in time.

The rain and 45 degree day seem fitting. As does the asshole who cuts in front of me and then stops short to stare at a dead squirrel in the middle of the road. I’ve forgotten how much I hate driving. Going back to New York will be a blessing in one big, public transportation way.

Snagging a gynecologist appointment at home was a stroke of luck, but as I pull into the familiar parking lot, I can’t help but feel the pre-visit jitters. It’s not that I’m afraid of those stirrups and cold metal speculums, I’m just not happy to see them. Ever. Read More »

Aw, man…Celebrities. I love ‘em. Just can’t read enough TMZ, US Weekly, Hello. I’m disgusted by the antics of Paris Hilton and her evil cohorts, but man do they make good reading material! It must be such a great life when the rest of the world revels in your stupid behavior. All that ever happens to me when I do something (normally alcohol induced) stupid is that my friends make sure to bring it up every time we are in the presence of other people.

I just recently came across this great list—The Drunk Tank; 10 Wasted Celebrities—and man, are these clips fuuuuunnnny. While I’ve seen many of them before (who didn’t see Paula Abdul off her rocker on live morning television), to have them all in one place is such a good laugh.

Personal favorites? Puff Daddy, or P Diddy, or—what is he called now?—talking about ProActiv. He’s not nearly as hard core when he’s had a few wine coolers. Brit Brit having a drunken convo with K-Fed. She should really just never, never talk unless she’s singing. Never. And my number one? Ben Affleck wasted during an interview trying to get the host into bed. I don’t know what’s better about this one—him being all over her, or the fact that she wants so badly to do him when the camera shuts off.

So, on this lovely spring day, please enjoy the public displays of drunkenness. And on your next night out, remember no one is safe with camera phones and YouTube in the mix!

Sure, the perfect romantic evening for me would entail sitting on the couch with my boyfriend, eating fried chicken, drinking cheap wine and watching American Idol (that Simon just makes me wanna cuddle!). But, that’s just me. Call me naive, but I truly believe that romance still exists, even with all the crappy guys out there in the cruel, cruel dating world.

Among all this week’s paternity tests and ignorant and racial slurs, there have been several uplifting stories of romance sure to make up for the recent lowlights.

Take Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams. They’ve been together ever since they met during the filming of The Notebook; only like, the most romantic tear-jerker of our time! I watched that movie by myself, and went into it thinking, “No way am I going to cry. This ain’t no Titanic.” By the end, I was a sobbing mess.

There have been rumors of a wedding on and off now for a couple of years, but now mags like Us Weekly have been reporting that these two really good-looking Canadian love birds are actually getting married this time. Even cuter? They grew up in the same ‘hood, but didn’t meet until The Notebook! They probably passed eachother on the street all the time as kids, but fate eventually took its course.

Sigh. Read More »